Frantic Nursing

[gracecody]

Hi Everyone,

I'm new here as I have just started implementing EASY.  I have a 9 wk old boy and he is big (10 lbs at birth and probably about 16 lbs now).  He had been eating every 2 hrs religiously from birth to about 6 wks and then we were able to start stretching the feeding times a bit to about 2.5 to 3 hours, longer at night.  He is a good night sleeper -- for 2 wks he has done a long stretch (usually 4-5 hours) followed by a shorter stretch and then we are up for the day around 7.

So anyway...after reading the Baby Whisperer I realized I had a snacker on my hands because he tends to feed for shorter times (10-15 min) more frequently during the day.  He feeds much longer, usually 40-45 min, at night and then goes right back to sleep.  I thought it would be good to push him a bit and see if we couldn't get to all 3 hour intervals during the day and we haven't had much of a problem accomplishing that over the past few days.  However, now he feeds frantically.  His arms and legs start thrashing around and he breathes fast.  He pulls off the nipple about every 5-10 secs (ouch) and sometimes shrieks when he can't find the nipple again right away.  Needless to say it is quite the chore to get him to feed 25-35 mins. this way!  I give him plenty of burp breaks so it's not that, and it can't be gas as this is happening with every single feeding.  I have seen others post abou this but didn't see any ideas or solutions in response.

Thanks for reading my novel, hope someone might have some suggestions!

[LindseysMom]

Hello.  I think if feeding him every 2-2.5 hours was working then why change.  He may be getting too hungry and maybe that is why he is so worked up at each feeding.   He is a big boy so maybe he needs to eat more often, and personally, I would rather have him eating more frequently during the day so hopefully he will go longer at night.  I would just keep feeding on demand and maybe try stretching him out a bit more between feeds when he is a little older.  Not all babies are ready for easy at the same age,  Remember, every baby is different.  So, dont worry about what a book says should be happening at a certain age but just go by your baby's cues.  He will let you know when he is ready to stretch it out a bit longer.  He is still so young.  Just my opinion here.  Congrats on your new baby.  And welcome!

[gracecody]

Thanks so much, Lindsey's mom.  What you say makes a lot of sense.  I have learned some good tips from the BW book (I am borrowing "The Baby Whisperer Solves All Your Problems" from a friend).  One of the best is the sleep routine with the four s's.  Believe it or not we are first time parents and my husband had already figured out a few of these things -- we were already doing the swaddling and the shhhh'ing.  We probably weren't giving him enough time to wind down and he really seems to need that.  He sure protests when we start to 'set the stage' but mellows after 5-10 minutes.  The main reason I wanted to try implementing EASY is because I had been keeping track of how much sleep our baby gets in a 24 hour period and it ranges from 11 to 15 hours.  He does not seem to go to sleep or stay asleep easily and I wanted to try to help him sleep more.  I also had been trying to nurse him to sleep almost exclusively and was having frustrations with him not unlatching and with him waking when I would burp him or put him in his co-sleeper.

Anyway, I think I made the mistake of worrying too much about the clock and not enough about his cues where his hunger is concerned.  I wanted to make sure he wasn't overeating as he is just a huge baby and continues to gain rapidly.  His 2 mo. appt is tomorrow so we will find out what he weighs (I am guessing 16-17) and see what our Dr. thinks.  Funny, I thought extending the time between feeds would make him feed more efficiently and the exact opposite happened.  Today I have been just going with his cues and he has been feeding better -- still a bit frantic but not until the end of the feed, and feeding more like every 2.5 hours again.  I think that is just where he's at for now.

Thanks again. 

[annamum]

Hi,

I agree with Lindsey'smom about following his clues. Every baby is different and if he is sleeping well at night, I wouldn't change a thing. I know what you mean about eating frantically when you lo is hungry, they seem to be so worked up and frantic that eating is more stressfull for everybody involved.

I tried to extend my dd feeding intervals when she was 2.5 months old, she was before fed on demand and it was impossible for her to go longer than 2.5 hours, occasionally 3 when we were out and she was in a sling. She was on a 2.5-3 hour EASY till she was 5 months old.

I used to worry why my baby is sleeping less than an average one. Somewhere it was written she should sleep at a certain age that many hours per day and she didn't. I did my best and still she didn't. Even today she sleeps less than an average toddler does and I wish sometimes she had more sleep but this is her nature, she is spirited when it comes to sleep. She thinks it is more fun to be up and play instead of wasting time and sleep. She may be falling asleep and if you ask her if she is sleepy or if she wants to sleep her answer will always be NO!

When you put him to sleep and he won't unlatch, how long do you wait to do this? There is also an excellent advice on how to deal with such situation in http://www.babywhisperer.com/forum/gentle-removal-plan-vt24669.html

HTH ,

[gracecody]

The not unlatching is only a problem during the night nursing, when I am nursing him to sleep.  During the day he is fine about unlatching once he's had his fill.  At night he will rarely nurse less than 45 min and will sometimes start to linger past one hour, at this point he is still sucking and swallowing intermittently so he overeats and then spits up about 15 min after I put him in bed, regardless of whether or not I burp him.  Very frustrating.  When I try to unlatch him with my finger, sometimes he will be sleepy enough to just drift off to sleep but most often he will start thrashing around to find the nipple and that brings him awake very quickly.  I'll check out that link -- thank you!!

PS, my baby does sound like your daughter.  As soon as I take him into the bedroom to wind him down for a nap, he starts to protest.  ANd he's not even 10 wks yet.  Sigh.

[annamum]

I can only say that his night feeds are long because he enjoys the closeness and quiet time with you in the middle of the night. There is no rush to learn and observe other things, he can just relax and enjoy his favorite milk bar :lol:. I know how hard it can be if it is in the middle of the night and you would rather be in your bed sleeping... But I also think that this should pass as he will get more mature and older. I remember that in early weeks my dd used to nurse during a day for 5 minutes and in the night she was staying on my breast longer, not that long but up to 25 minutes. Later she naturally cut down her nursing time at night, too.