Need feeding-schedule help for 8 mo.!

[Tru's Mommy]

Rowan is 8 months and one week-old.  I just can not seem to get him on a feeding schedule anymore.  We started a 4hour schedule at 4 months of age and then by 6 months he was eating solids 3x a day and still doing fine on a 4-hr schedule (breastfeeding 5x a day with one nightfeed).

We have slowly digressed into him not being interested in the breast at the 4-hr. mark.  There are times when at the 5-hr. mark he will eat from one side and then not want to nurse the other.  I'm always offering the breast (or sometimes the bottle) first and follow with solids 30 min to an hour later.

Here is a typical day for us:

Wake at 7 a.m.-ish - BF (though if he's had a 3 or 4 a.m. feed, he's not starving)
Cereal/fruit or waffle at 8:30 a.m.
Nap around 9:30 a.m.
Attempt a BF at 11 a.m.-ish
Lunch at noon
Nap around 2:00 p.m.
Attempt a BF around 4:00 p.m.
Dinner at 6:00 p.m.
Bath, BF, bed at 7:00 p.m.-ish

So, that's 4 breastfeeds a day but maybe we get two good ones and two mediocre.

What further complicates things are his nightwakings and different wake-up times.  I do try to do his first BF of the day the same time everyday, despite when he wakes up.

Also, ds#1 goes to nursery school 2x a week, so those mornings are a rush to get out the door and BF and breakfast is sometimes out of whack.

It seems like Rowan would rather play, watch his big brother, practice crawling, contemplate his toes, ANYTHING but breastfeed.  This has been going on for a few months, and it's starting to stress me out because I just can't get him to eat like he should and I'm losing the desire to keep trying with the breastfeeding.  I made it to one year with ds#1, but I'm constantly thinking of dropping the daytime breastfeeds and replace with bottles of formula (keeping the a.m and bedtime breastfeeding).

Not sure what I'm asking, but I'm doing something wrong--help!   :lol:   I looked at the sample EASY schedules and most babies his age are still doing 4 breastfeeds or bottle and solids 3x a day. 

Tru & Rowan's Mommy

[GraceKellysmom]

Hey girl, nice to see you.

I think his schedule sounds great. You're kind of in a transition right now - and will be for a couple months - to 3 feeds. Keep offering and if he won't, don't stress it. I am always shocked at how much Max could get in just a few minutes - I could pump 6-8 oz so I knew he was getting at least 4. Plenty for a mid day "snack". You could try to reduce the *amount* of food given at solids feeds to encourage the nursing more.

Max didn't have a regular "breakfast" until about 11 months old (I am SO lazy!  :lol: ) Some mornings it was just dry cereal while we ate. If he slept in I just skipped it all together and nursed him. Rowan's schedule sounds about what Max was doing. Max woke once a night to eat for a while, and sometimes I'd skip the first am nursing because he wasn't hungry and just go to solids. It was 4 feeds a day anyway. I've become horribly flexible - so hard for my formerly planner self.

Don't forget to look at the bigger picture, where you want him to be in a couple months, etc. Know that he'll let you know if he's hungry.  :wink:  And stop thinking of bottles!  :lol:  Do you really want more work?  :lol:  You have two babies!  :wink:  Lots of love ...

[Nikki~Nathan&Danielle]

Sounds the same as what's going on here.  D will get very distracted for her two middle of the day feeds.  I'm just going with it.  She still feeds once in the night too and I know it's probably to make up for what she's not getting, so I'm just going with it for now.  Also, I have sometimes been offering another feed straight after her dinner (instead of water)since she tends to be thirsty at that time, so it's a little more milk she's getting.  Those day feeds she really only drinks the letdown and that's it, she's off.  I'm not too sure it's anything to be majorly worried about though?

[Tru's Mommy]

Well, you both have made me feel better!  And, I have also gotten WAY more flexible about feeding times with Rowan because I really have no choice.  The "go with the flow" is nice most of the time, but it's disconcerting when I feel like I can't get into the groove with the nursing.  It was a lot easier with Tru because it was JUST him, and there wasn't anything distracting him when he was nursing.  Boy, have things changed!

Bottles are not hard--in fact, Rowan holds his own and can feed himself, sitting up or laying down.  So, when he only nurses a little, I will make him a small bottle and turn him loose with Tru and he'll take a few ounces. 

I feel like I'm in a vicious cycle of him making up the calories in the middle of the night, then he's too full for his first feeding, that throws off his schedule all day and then he's hungry again in the middle of the night.

He's actually only slept through the night (11+ hours) for one blessed month.  That was from about age 5 mo. to age 6 mo.  Then we're back to up once, sometimes twice a night.  Last night he went from 7 p.m. to 4:30 a.m. then back down until after 8 a.m.  That was WONDERFUL.  But eventually I'd like the 4 a.m. (or earlier feeding) to just go away.  Any thoughts on that, or just tough it out? 

Also, are y'all trying to start your day at the same time every day?  I'm so reluctant to do this.  Sleep is so precious now that I would NEVER wake Rowan up in the a.m.  Sometimes it's 7 a.m., sometimes it's after 8 a.m. before he's up.  So, that means our feeding schedule is off by over an hour some days.   Though, I try to just get in 4 feeds.  Is that okay?

Knock on wood, 45-minute naps are pretty much gone.  Sometimes he will do one when he's just not tired in the morning and will just need a short nap.  Then he'll do a good nap after lunch.  They just phased out on their own with no help from me around 7 mo.  Same with Tru at that age, and I tried everything under the sun to extend them, lol!!!

THANKS for the input!

[Tru's Mommy]

Just saw this...you are pregnant with twins, GraceKelly'sMom???  WWOOOWWWW!!!!  Congrats!  How exciting!

[GraceKellysmom]

I'd say let him sleep as long as he can in the am, up to a certain point which is likely 8 am? Then just adjust his nap times according to when he woke up. Yes 4 feeds is perfect for the age, but don't stress if some days it is 3 and some days it is 5.

I remember Tru being the king of 45 min naps. I'm glad Rowan is settling into a nice afternoon nap. Sometimes I would wake Max from the am nap by a certain time (let's say 10:30am) to preserve the afternoon nap at 1. Grace napped at the 1:00 and it was my only me time.

Max only slept through from 8 weeks to 16 weeks, and he has woken ever since. He stopped waking for a feed a couple months ago, now he just WAKES. Dh is on night duty - so I could care less how he settles him  :lol:  - yes you read it right TWINS  :shock:  :shock: are on the way and I need my sleep!    :wink:

[Tru's Mommy]

Yep, Tru was a 45-minute napper from 5 weeks to 6 months, and then they began to phase out.  Rowan did them from about 4 mo. to 6 mo. (pretty typical age for this, I know!).  Now he'll do about an hour and 15 in the morning and close to two hours in the p.m.  Tru and Rowan are both down by 2:30 p.m. and I get a blissful break.

Well, I'll just keep working on getting the feeds in, even if they aren't as scheduled as I would like.  It won't be long before he's on cow's milk and this will all be a blip on the radar.

[Nikki~Nathan&Danielle]

Danielle has only slept through about 4wks total as well.  Like Stacy did I wake her after a 1hr nap in the morning (so she's awake by 10-10.30amish) and then put her down for her afternoon nap around 1pm for a good 2hr one (of course this USED to time in with Nathan's nap until he decided he no longer needed it  :roll: ). 

I find now that D's older, I will mix up the feed times, so if I want to go out in the morning and she's woken at 10am, I will feed around 10.30 instead of 11am and it's no big deal since she'll have lunch around 12 anyway.  Same goes for the afternoon feed, it can range from 2.30-4pm depending how long/or short her nap goes, and whether we're going out or have been out.  That's the beauty of being on solids now, things are just so much more flexible.