i need help

[millsmum]

this is my first post so scuse me if i waffle on....
Can anyone help me, my DD is a year on Monday, she has always been a spirited baby (!) but has slept through from 8 weeks, the last weeks i have had hystericks at bedtime, we have always had a decent bedtime routine, tea at 5, bath 6.30 and bed at 7, give or take her day.
She used to go down and i have always done the shush /pat, but now as soon as i put her in her cot she yells, nay screams and thrashes about, pulling herself up and fighting with me, i pick her up to comfort her and she throws herself back down, oh she is very mobile, has been walking since 10 months and is a busy lady!I must admit i think ive got into a bit of AP as she has had a constant cold for four weeks and (visits to the doctors who tell me give her paracetomol and fluids, i do not like drugging my girl) i did take her downstairs when she was waking up coughing, as i have an unsympathetic partner 'who needs sleep', (tell you what, its lucky she has been such a good beby up to now!)
She started at the childminders 3 months ago and has settled brilliantly, but would not sleep there for the first month, she now sleeps in the buggy or on the CMinders bed, about an hour in the day, maybe twice a day, she only goes there three days a week.
I just dont know what to do, last night she was hysterical, sobbing and throwing her head back, 'real tears' as they say, i dont want her to hate me, i felt dreadful so went downsatirs -no lights or tv- and cuddled on the settee for about an hour, she then went straight into her bed and slept till this morning, but i feeldreadful, what am i doing wrong, well i know, but i dont know what to do, i am quirte isolated and the mums i do know have 'perfect' babies- i just want M to go to sleep, get a good few nights in and i feel that will help her cold tooo,
Any help would be grateful,
kind regards :roll:

[Katet]

Sounds like a normal case of separation anxiety... try to stay with her in the bedroom until she settles & off to sleep for a few nights, then gradually every few nights leave slightly earlier until you leave at the "orignal time"

She may also need more "wind-down' time after the bath, I know my toddler does, he needs about 15mins of stories before he is ready to settle down for sleep, so maybe try having a bit of a quiet read of stories or cuddle before you setle for bed

when you are there, tell her you will stay until she falls asleep & then will come back if she needs you at night... reassure her along the way with "it's ok night night" type phrases...  then when you gradually leave earlier explain each step... "night night Mummy is leaving, I'll come back if you need me" & do just that... it may take a week or 2 & may be a few steps forward & back over the course, but she needs to feel secure about bedtime.

[millsmum]

Thank you so much for that, i have been trying it and things are getting better, obviously a bit mad over the xmas period but we are getting back on track....keep up the good work, this is an excellent forum, so much info