Think I'm a prop for sleep - don't know when to ignore ?

[jueboo]

Hi there,

I'm a bit confused and wondered if anyone can help. I have never left my 4 month old boy to cry it out as I just don't agree with it, however it is getting to the stage that when he makes a cry or wakes up a bit I go into him, is this right? he wakes up every couple of hours now and I think it's because when he stirs a bit and i am not there he gets upset. 

My husband says I should leave him to cry for a couple of minutes ( not a screaming cry more like a 'mum come here!' shout)I find it really hard and don't know if I am making things worse ? I don't understand where the line is between leaving him to cry it out or just leaving him to see if he will re-settle.

any advice appreciated

julie

[Jaime]

it's definitely a very fine line - and sometimes so hard to tell, isn't it?!

with ds, i found that if i went into him and he got louder & angrier, i never should have gone in, cause it wasn't his "i need you" cry.  it took me a long time to learn how to distinguish that cry, but once i did it became much easier for me to respond to him.

especially around the 4-6 month range, he made lots of noise in his sleep.  most of it was normal resettling, and once i learned to ignore that, it helped him sleep better. 

also, fwiw, at night i only ever got out of bed if the cry escalated.  then i ran fast!   :lol:

[jueboo]

Thanks a lot

I think I have been going to him a bit too soon sometimes it's just easier in the short term at 3 am! but I know I have to be a bit stronger - If I know he is not in pain or hungry or has a wet bum! 

will try what DH says although not as far!

julie X