March/April '05 Thread #4

[Olivia's Mommy]

Well, it was a long night, but we made it...more on that later.

Michelle--good luck today, let us know how you and Molly do. I'm sure all will be fine.

Cathy--We also had a problem with soaking through diapers at night. I bought the plastic training pants you put over cloth diapers and I put those on her at night. It seems to help. At least I'm not changing her PJs and the sheets in the middle of the night. And she doesn't seem to mind them.

Richelle--I know what you mean about DH being home. Love it, but it is added work!!

OK, so last night Liv was in bed at 7:30. Up at 8:00. I did PU/PD until 8:30, then she went back to sleep. Up again at 10:15, did PU/PD for an hour! and finally gave up. Fixed a bottle, but she only took a couple oz and fell asleep. Up again at 1:00. Just held her to sleep. Only took 10 min. she slept until 4:30...I held to sleep again, this time for only 5 min. She slept until 5:30...figured she was hungry, so gave her a bottle (only ate about 4 oz). Slept till 7:00, held her for 5 min again and she slept until 9:00. And this whole time DH was sick...up most of the night throwing up (again sorry if TMI). So this is a fun household today!!!

I went to bed determined to do PU/PD through the night, but after it took an hour, I knew I couldn't do it by myself. She seems to respond to the holding, and it's gotten better. Used to take her almost an hour to settle. Now she settles in less than 5 min. So, I thought maybe I'll hold her and just decrease the time each time until it's basically a PU/PD. PU/PD just seems to upset her more. Any thoughts on this? I'm still not sure if her waking is due to off-routine, separation anxiety, or just plain over-tiredness from our crazy week and no sleep. I appreciate all insight as I'm almost at the end of my rope!!

Well, better go fix breakfast...have a good one girls!

[Erin M]

Nancy - ((hugs)) for your nasty night.  You do have to wonder if there's something else going on with Liv with all those wakings.  Here's my thought on the matter - since right now she seems to be going through something, you might want to try just holding her, especially if she's settling so fast.  I would just watch kind of closely to make sure it's not becoming a prop, and if it seems like it is, maybe then try PU/PD.  Not really 100% sure though - she may just need some extra snuggles with all the moving around that you've done the past couple of weeks.  Hopefully, your naps will go OK today and that will help get you back on routine.

Michelle - Hope all goes well for you today - are you back to work too, or are you just getting Molly used to day care?  It amazes me how well Katie has adapted to day care (even though she's only there two days a week) - she gets so excited when I bring her there now and her caregivers are wonderful.  I could deal without the constant colds, but at least you know that's coming your way.  Let us know how it works out.

Judy - Where are you?  Hope you and the girls are feeling ok.

Speaking of missing people, anyone seen Andrea lately? 

Naomi - I would just keep the junk food out of the house.  We are needing to do that too here.  My DH has no restraint when it comes to things like chips - he'll always eat just about the whole bag.  He gained more weight than I did when I was pg, and he hasn't lost it yet, but we're going to try to change that with the new year.

Cathy - sorry about your rough night - but I would still pay money to see you change Carter while nursing.  And good for you for getting to the gym.  That's a place I haven't seen the inside of in WAY too long.

Hayley - glad to hear Daniel is back to eating.

Roz - glad to hear your holidays went well.  Cheerios are a food group here too - for whoever was asking - Cheerios are breakfast cereal - whole grain little "o" shaped things.  I think they're pretty bland, but DH and Katie would eat them all day long - I have no idea what the equivalent would be overseas.  Oooh, putting an offer in on a house, how exciting - keep us up to date on how that goes!

Hannah - hope work goes well for you today.  Katie got three teeth at once a month or so ago - I found it easier as she was still up the same amount for 3 as she was for 1.  I was reading something about how "What to Expect..." is considered by some to be a bit too alarmist about some things - though if it's really bothering her, I might give the ped a call - though they'll probably tell you exactly the same thing that Micky did. 

DH is back to work here too.  I sometimes think that Katie has no separation anxiety issues, and then earlier I put her on the floor of her room and left to go to the bathroom and she got hysterical.  Poor sweetie.  Have a nice day everyone!

[Erin M]

Hmmm...just noticed we seem to have some sort of sleep moderator explosion on our thread - Kate, Jo - good for you!  Was thinking of offering to help, but I was too chicken to volunteer.

[Nikki~Nathan&Danielle]

Morning, this will just be a quick one, so much to catch up on.

Well I've decided to not feed Danielle in the night anymore.  She slept through 2 nights in a row and then last night woke with her legs stuck through the bars, so I tried to resettle - she wasn't having a bar of it, but I stuck with it (usually I would feed if she got a bit snotty).  Nancy, I decided to not do pu/pd too but holding/rocking then put her into bed and continued to pat in there.  If she got grumpy I'd repeat.  For us it took an hour for her to fully resettle - I actually would go back to bed for 5mins cause she went quiet, but then would let out a little fuss now and again, she never actually cried at all, so I feel that it's just the feeding on waking that I need to conqueur first so not so worried about holding her in the interim.  In the end I got DH to go in and he just patted her back for about a minute and she was off to sleep.  Tonight I'm going to get DH to do it from the get go and see what happens.

Michelle, good luck with today, thinking of you.

Richlle, my house is constant mess too with DH home, he was working last week but is home this week, I'm constantly picking up crap.  :roll:

Hayley, yay for Daniel eating some of your food!

Catch ya later.

[Taylor's Mommy]

Hi Ladies,

Happy NEw Year everyone!  I am supposed to be doing DH's billing right now but am instead on page. 9 of our chat trying to catch up.  We had our dearest closest friends in from out of town since Friday till last night so no real time to come on here and chat without hurting anyone's feelings KWIM?

Just wanted to say hi and when I have "caught up" I will come back on.

I could really use some of your support, which you all give so well.  Feeling down about the whole routine thing and wondering why I even bother really?   :? 

[Judy]

Heya Ladies!  Haven't caught up on the last few pages yet - still reading.

Had a quick question though... For those finding their little people staying awake for 3+hours (Nikki I think you've mentioned Danielle has a longer wake time now)... how do you fit this in with breastfeeds?  We're still doing a 4hour EASY basically... so first thing in the morning the girls wake and bf then solids but they go down for a nap after about 3hrs A time - then they're up in just an hour because it's feed time again... not sure how I'd extent their A time and still get a reasonable nap.  I could try to hold off their eating during the day after they wake but first thing in the morning I'm not up for so much but feeding anyway.

Oh, I'm feeling MUCH better... but YES I will keep taking my antibiotics until it's finished!!

[Richelle]

Michelle - I hope today went well!  I too am unsure of whether or not you have gone back to work, so sorry if you have mentioned it  :oops: !

Yes I do notice the Mod explosion!  Well done Kate and Jo. 

Andrea -  I have a couple of questions for you regarding your routine woes:

 :arrow: Was it because of your dear friends visiting?  It is so hard when you are around people with no babies or older kids, epecially if you are on a routine.  People have trouble with the concept that babies aren't accessories, they are actual people.  I do mean that in the nicest way.  I said the other day that I would love to go to a movie and DH said, well let's go, can;t we just bring Sophie, she'll sleep no?  Well, she is not a purse and do I really want to subject her to all that noise and flashing asleep or not?

 :arrow: Do they have kids?  My friends that don;t have kids have, very inadvertently by the way, made me feel really bad sometimes about making sure Sophie has nice, warm secure naps and a consistent day to make her feel safe.  I figure if I don;t sacrifice for Sophie who will and I do take comfort in the fact that Sophie is very happy, as is Taylor - I mean check out that smile...would a sleepy, confused baby smile like that?

 :arrow: Did you have a hard time fitting in all the cheer over the holidays?  Christmas was definately a whole new ball game this year and I did in fact get a little down and stir crazy but then folks stopped by and well, you guys remeber my Juicy Lucy posts!

 :arrow: Are you feeling house bound and by now (8 months later) you are up to your eyeballs with the site of your own house?  It has been a long haul for you and you have put in some very long hours and have committed a lot of time to Taylor in the last 8 + months and have every reason to feel down and out!  Also it is very difficult with a baby to accomplish 1/2 what we used to but imagine if you just schlepped her wherever, you know those moms in the bnk/doctor's office ect.. with the screaming baby?  Well I don't find that getting a few more things done in a day with a screaming baby any easier than trying to maintain a consistent day for Sophie.

 :arrow: Do you have any days for yourself, I mean a full day AWAY form Taylor and DH?  This is sooo important.  The other day all I wanted was to chill out at home by the pool without having to worry ect.. about Sophie so I asked (YES - I always have to ask) and DH took her out for a few hours - it was heaven.  I also have my ex-nanny come around to watch Sophie for an afternoon or DH will do it on a Saturday so I can hve lunch with a girlfriend or get my hair done.  Is there someone who can come baby sit? 

I hope you feel better and know that you have taken a more difficult road and have every reason to feel blue or annoyed!!

[kq]

So much to catch up on...first of all, Hannah, about the bum rash, I think "What to expect.." wants you to get it checked out in case it is something else more serious than just a diaper rash. If you're sure then I would not worry. With Sam's bum, I wipe with whatever, sometimes wipes and sometimes a wet towel. I then dry with a hairdryer! I have done it since day 1 and have never had problems with bum rash ( doing Kate's anti jinx dance while writing this). The only problem is that we only have one hairdryer and the times I need to use it, Sam is either napping or asleep for the night heve the dreadful hairdos.  :wink:

Hugs to Michelle. Thinking about you and Molly, I would be exactly the same way.

Andrea, everything Hannah said and big <<<HUGS>>> Vent all you want! Know though that Taylor is so happy because of the routine, check out that smile!!!

Judy, Sam has just started staying awake 3.5 hours between nap 1 and 2. I have been giving lunch later rather than immediately after his bottle and that seems to tide him over for an extra half hour to an hour.

Welcome back Roz and keep us posted on the new house. How exciting!

Hayley, YAY for Daniel. You could use carrot, pumpkin in that custard recipe. Maybe I will make it for Sam for dinner...haven't done it in a while!

Nancy, hang in there! We are rooting for you! Sorry about the terible night!

Cathy, I too would pay to see you change Carter while breastfeeding. How did you say you did it again? I just cannot imagine....

Traci and Ankie, nights any better?
Have a great day all!

[Erin M]

Nikki - good luck with the not feeding at night.  Fingers crossed that you're working  your way towards restful nights!

Andrea - I cannot say it any better than Richelle did, but you do gets lots of ((hugs)) from me.  Just think, they're only this little for such a short amount of time that if the routine works and makes her happy, it's totally worth it.  Maybe Taylor could take a bit of flexibility in her routine at this point?  I find if I get one good nap in Katie during the day, I'm generally ok to mess with the second.

Judy - routine - ok, I know I'm not BFing full time, but I can tell you that we're on sort of a 4.5-5 hour EASY these days at least in the beginning of the day.  Towards the end of the day, I'll often feed before sleep just to get it all in and get the times right.  We're way off because of the holidays right now in terms of waking up time and all, but today Katie got up around 8:00 and BF, I gave her cereal and fruit around 9:15, and she napped from 11-1 (I should have woken her up as it wrecked her afternoon nap, but let her sleep instead).  Lunch was at 1 - I give her a bottle and her lunch at the same time -- if I had woken her up earlier, she would have been ready for another nap around 4:30, so I probably would have given her a bottle before her nap.  Dinner would then be around 6 and bedtime at 8 - our bedtimes and waking up times have crept much later these days because of all the Christmas chaos.  In a nutshell, I either feed her less often than every 4 hours or do EAESA.  Hope that makes sense.

[Taylor's Mommy]

well girls, I did read the last 7 pages, but know I can't comment on everyone, but will try:

Jo and Kate-Congrats on the Super Mod titles!  What boards are you moderating?

Michelle and Hannah-how did going back to work and starting daycare go? 

Haley-glad you are having some success with the solids.  I guess persistance is the key right?

Judy-breastfeeds are getting quite tricky here with the Loooong A time.  We try to do something like this:
BF at 7ish when wake for the day
BF at 11ish when wake from 1st nap (first nap is usually only 1 hour)
BF at 4:30ish when wake from 2nd nap but I am actually thinking of trying to BF at 3ish before she goes down for her 2nd nap because I think my milk supply is suffering because of the long stretches in between KWIM?
BF at bed time
so 4 total, but the 2nd and 3rd feedings are definitely hit and miss with how much she'll take.  SOme days not interested AT ALL, some days will eat just fine.   :?

Richelle; thanks so much for caring so much to write out all those thoughts.  I think you are right on several counts:
1. I am just OVER the holidays and so glad they're done, but now the joys of putting all the crap away!  every weekend since thanksgiving it has been NON STOP!
2. I am tired of looking around this house and always seeing something to do  :evil:   It's like no matter how much laundry, dishes cooking you do, there is always MORE!
3. I have my mom and MIL help watch T 3 days a week so I can work on DH's business and Taylor Made, so there quite honestly is not a lot of time in there for me.  Except here, but a lot of the time I feel guilty coming on here during the day when they're here watchign her KWIM?

 :arrow:  :arrow: So the thing that frustrates me with the routine is when I really analyze things Taylor is so friggin inconsistent with her sleeping and her naps I just feel like what is the use and the point???  The longest stretch she will ever go with sleeping through the night is 7 days.  Then it can be anywehre from 2-14 days of night wakings!   :shock:   And her naps!  One day one nap will be great, the next day both naps, the next day none of her naps are longer than 45 minutes!  My gosh I swear I try to be as consistent as possible.  Wathcing her and the clock.  Winding down.  Making the room dark, etc., etc.  But still all this damn inconisistency!  It's like each day is a guessing game as to waht she will do!  When I look back, months 3-5 were the best.  Since then it's a crap shoot. 
She has slept through for the last 2 nights after 11 days of night wakings!  I guess I have to be thankful for small blessings.   :roll:

On top of all this, I am missing my old job pretty bad.  I can't tell you guys how much I loved my old job.  And now I just feel so blah and well, just blah!  Today I did my hair and am going to put a little makeup on so I can feel somewhat like a girl. 
Richelle, do you ever miss your job???

Sorry girls for the long vent.  Tehre is a lot more that has gone in with T's development lately, so will post that exciting news later, but for now will say TTFN!

thanks for listening!

[Taylor's Mommy]

BTW, the thing that got me on the rant about me upholdign her routine so nicely and it still turning into crap was that on NY day we went to my parents house for dinner with screaming toddlers, tons of aunts/uncles wanting to hold her and just about absolute chaos going on.  We get her home, quickly feed her and then have MIL put pj's on so we can scoot to the movies to see Memoirs of a Geisha (very good BTW).  As we are leaving, MIL takes her out to teh den where lights are bright and TV is blaring the game that Grandpa is watching :shock:  It is already almost 8pm!  I say it's time to go to bed and we take off.  MIL tells me when we got home that she rocked her to sleep  :x  Well, she ended up sleepign through the night which was the first time in 11 days!  WTF!?!?!

Then yesterday back to moms so we can take dear friends to the airport and mom keeps her up 4 hours  :shock:  and she takes a 2 hour 45 minute nap!  WTF?  She NEVER sleeps that long when she is at home in all the ideal surroundings with her comfy crib and warm blankie.  But at grandma's house where she has never slept in the porta crib!?!?!?!  DH and I both started wondering why we even bother!

BEc-I am really feelign very similar to you and wondering if it has anything to do with PPD???

[Judy]

Ok let's see what I can remember of what I wanted to comment on

Hannah - diaper rash... I wouldn't worry too much if it isn't gone in 3 days but I'd take a close look at it.  If it's really bright red and not improving then it's quite likely a yeast rash and not going to budge on it's own.  Zoe never had a diaper rash before going to a sitter at 11months.  The sitter didn't change her as frequently as I had AND fed her food with really HOT peppers in it - which the child LOVED but man, her poor bum was RAW... I mean RAW.  I had to tell the sitter to lay off the spicy food   Now Sarah, at about 11 months too, we went to my brother's wedding and the day we left she had a red bum.  Well we'd dealt with them before and they always cleared right away.  We couldn't budge the thing.  Went to the dr - yeast, got some cream from him by script.  Used the whole bottle and it cleared all but 1 or 2 tiny satellites (look like little teeny tiny pimples) then it flaired up again.  It was well over a month before the darn thing was gone for GOOD!  Poor kid - although she never seemed bothered by it.  K&H - Kaia had a tiny satellite there after a couple days with Huggies diapers (hate those things and threw out the rest of the box!!) so the dr. gave us a script and it basically cleared but every night when she gets in the bath she scratches and scratches till she gets as red as can be from the scratching (but all day it looks like normal ol' skin)... can't see to completely help her out there. 

Michelle {{hugs}} hope your day went well.  Going back just sucks doesn't it?!!

Andrea.  Ok, want my take?  NO?  ok that's fine.  Let me know if you change your mind!

[Judy]

   Had to get you laughing!!

Ok.  I think the EASY routine is really important when babies are young and learning to go to sleep and learning what their day/life is all about.  Some kids thrive on routine for years and years to come and some don't.  I think it's ok to relax and roll with things a bit - especially if you have a happy easy going child.  Routine can mean many things - Up for 2.25hrs then sleep for 1.5hrs then bottle, wait 27min then give cereal and veg etc. etc. etc..  OR it could be that we eat when we get up and when we're tired of playing we go to sleep.  Similar to bedtime routines - I think everyone here likely has a different one, me?  My bed/sleep routine is this:  We walk to the bedroom, I put the girls in their sleep bags and say "time for sleep" and lay them down and leave the room.  With other children around I don't have the time (or desire) to have a lengthy wind down, singing and such.  (I say desire because when it was only Zoe that was my whole gig too - and it worked so why change it)  Zoe likes more routine for bed now - she likes her "B's" - breakfast (cereal snack she calls breakfast), books, bathroom, bed.  But some nights we read on the couch, sometimes in their room, sometimes she passes out on the couch before we get to any of it, sometimes we do it all up and she still won't settle down.

Anyway.  My point?  I have no idea what it is anymore

The long wake time at your mom's - Taylor may not handle such long wake time at home day after day because it is draining... but some children can handle it once in a while, especially somewhere different that is interesting enough to keep their attention and keep them from noticing how tired they are... and then with all the irregular stimulation she passed out and had a great nap.  I don't think that seems odd at all. 

If it's any help, naps are as up and down here too.  Somedays we get two 30min naps, other days we'll get 2hrs am and 2hrs pm.  I cannot figure out the difference from one day to the next and to be honest I don't want to have to worry *that* much about it.  I just try to not be bothered when they wake after a short nap - which is hard because each time I put them down I walk away hoping for 1.5-2hrs and it can be frustrating not to get that.

Gotta scoot - bedtime.

[Richelle]

Andrea - I think Taylor doing so well out of her surroundings is b/c of all your consistency.  Like Erin said I'm sure Taylor could handle changing it up nowadays and maybe this is just her way of letting you know  :wink: !   I do miss my job some days but then I get calls from the staff all the time bitching and telling me they miss me and asking if I can fix things for them.  I try to do the best that I can but am really trying to completely phase out.  it was very taxing and what I do miss sometimes is the mayhem!  I don;t think that I have been finished long enough to truly miss it yet, to be honest but I am sure that I will!

Nikki - I know that once I decided to stop feeding Sophie at 4AM she followed along after a few days, fingers crossed.

Judy - I wake Sophie up in the AM after an hour and after an 1.5 hours in the PM or I will not get 12ish hours at night, between that and feeding her solids and a bottle in the same sitting, it seems to fit in. HTH
 
I got a pile of Xmas cards today from; Bec, Hayley, Naomi, Erin, Holly,  and Macaire.

They are great, way to keep the Holiday season alive!

[Jayri]

okay, I got lisa's cards the other day and then today, I got a card from karen and another from jo.
Jo, I have to say I was very touched at the memo you put into the card, it was meant for a group yet it was so personal at the same time.
It gave me a nice perk after my crap day at work when the computer system could do nothing right.
Well, I am off to get the kids bags ready for tomorrow..
OH!!!! michelle and hannah, how did your girls and you all today?
Andrea, nice to know everything is okay....