March/April '05 Thread #4

[Arwyn's mom]

Hello ladies...

Don't have much time... Arwyn is suffering from Short Nap Syndrome and Multiple Night Waking Disorder so... mommy is plain knackered.

Andrea... I sooooo hear you on the routine breaking trauma. While you may not be seeing results now, you can bet that they will be evident later. I always ask myself, "Could it be worse?" and the answer is always, "Yes." You can trust that you are bringing up Taylor the way you feel is best for you, her and integration into your family life. You sound a bit like me in terms of schedules, deadlines, routines, etc... anything to do with planning... and I couldn't imagine having a baby that wasn't on any sort of routine. The unpredictability would drive me nuts. I know that Taylor's short naps are unpredictable too... however, you have a lovely routine that you can plan your day around (at least loosely).

The trouble with "throwing it all out the window" is that you may not be able to let go mentally. Unfortunately, once enlightened, you can never go back... especially if it is something that you really believe in. And a routine sounds like something you really believe in.

I wish you all the "pick my up" vibes I can send your way. I know it is sooooo frustrating when you put in so much work. Raising children is like that... tonnes and tonnes of input, to get an ounce of output.

Traci... Girlfriend, you and I have to just escape and sleep for a night or two. If you feel comfortable with it, just continue to feed Cole once in the night. My doctor says that some babies just need to be fed and can't make it through the night until over 1 year. I know it is not very BW advice but you, my friend, have been at it for a long time and Cole doesn't seem to be able to go without a feed. He sounds super active and maybe his body just needs more. BTW, do you know if he is waking due to moving around? I find that if I "pseudo-swaddle" Arwyn, she falls asleep faster. I hold her over my shoulder, put the blanket on her and tuck the two ends between her and I so that her arms can't move. DH is able to restrain both arms just while holding her but my limbs are not long enough.

Hayley... on top of a terrible eater, yes, I have a screaming baby at the end of EACH friggin' feeding. I keep telling her, don't scream, tell mommy, "all done" and do the sign but it has not sunk in yet. :roll:

{{{{{HUGS}}}}} to everybody. Sounds like everybody needs one... the back to work moms, moms of screaming or ear-pulling twins, routine-breaking babes, non-eating munchkins, and non-sleeping through the night bubs. Anybody not have one of these, just sit back and drink your coffee. :wink:

My DH held Arwyn back to sleep last night :twisted: when I was out running errands. We had a multiple night waking night again (what else is new?) and the random nature of them is driving me insane. Sometimes it takes me up to 40 minutes to put her back down. I feed at the middle waking and this morning at 5:20, I also fed... :oops: and I figured she didn't need a morning BF... I was wrong... ate tonnes at 7:10 after fussing like crazy in her walker. Growth spurt? or just plain nuttiness?

Ta ta... baby will wake soon... gotta get some breakfast.

[Carter'sMama]

Congrats to all the new Mods!!!!  We are such a bunch of talented ladies aren't we??!!! 

Our night was better than we have been having but worse than the norm.  We had one long waking at about 1:30.  Dh decided to try and handle it but the cries kept getting louder and longer and more desperate.  I intervened after 40 mins or so and noticed Carter was soaking wet in pee again!!  I think DH doesn't know what to do when he goes in there.  He knows I tell him to rub his belly and don't pick him up unless you have to etc so he never knows what to do.  I know if I let him do whatever he wanted then he woudl walk around the whole house rocking Carter in his arms which is what I don't want.  I guess I might as well just do it myself.  Anyway, ended up changing Carter while breastfeeding but with DH's help this time!!  Then he slept until 7:30 which was very nice.  He was a total bear to pu tto sleep last night and it took me almost an hour.  FInally he went to sleep at 9:00pm which is why he slept so late.
He had a great morning nap for the first time in days so I am feeling alittle more positive.  Decided to pray for all March/Apr mama's to have just ONE night of no night wakings (ie atleast 10 hours of consecutive sleep).  Will have to see if it works.  I mean we all definitely deserve it so we can function and be nice to our babies!  Or else we will be all locked in our bathrooms!!    LOL

Micky:  Love the pics!  Jack is the cutest!!!!  You look exactly like I pictured you (I am usually dead wrong) ... even though can't really see your face.  The beach looks wonderful btw!!!

Roz:  I always make sure to "point downwards" and it used to work.  Then I realized DH never did it but now he always does as well and it doesn't seem to matter at all.  Must try the plastic pants that Nancy (I think) was suggesting.

Hayley:  Carter cries at the end of every meal!!!  As soon as I try and take the dish away he starts screaming.  He just loves to eat!!!

Andrea:  Yeah for Taylor!!!  Carter is finally at the rocking-in-the-crawling position stage.  That's about it though.  Oh ya, he can turn circles while sitting ... :roll:  :roll:   Whoppee!!! 

Michelle & Erin:  I am glad that you both have fairly positive experiences with daycare!  I am currently looking for one for Carter (have to go back to work end of Feb).  I was dreading it because I was worried that no one would follow his routine and he woudl never sleep and everything would be all messed up.  I have a meeting with a lady tomorrow night.  She does daycare out of her house and only has one other child at the moment so I know Carter will get loads of attention.  I hope it works out!  Don't know why I am bothering to go back.  I won't be making much money after daycare is all paid for ... however if I put in enough hours I will get another paid year of maternity leave with lo #2.

Well, I smell poop and hear fussing coming from the tigger jumper so must go!  Later ladies!!!!
Be back later!!

Oh ya .. got 3 cards in the mail today (Thanks Karen, Hayley, and Jo).  I love the letter Jo ... I feel the same way!!

[Olivia's Mommy]

(Warning: long post ahead!)

Well, last night was better, and I have to brag on DH. I took Liv grocery shopping with me yesterday afternoon so he could get some rest. He was feeling better, but still not well enough to be out of bed more than a few minutes at a time. While I was gone, he slept, then was feeling better, so he picked up around the house as it was a distaster from our rough couple of days. As I mentioned last night, bedtime was DREADFUL...so DH took over and sent me to bed at 9:00. He stayed up till midnight in case she woke (since he'd slept most of the day and was feeling better). He said she only woke once in that time and settled fairly easily. She woke again at 1:15, I went in and put my hand on her and she settled right down and went back to sleep. She woke again about 4:30, but settled herself before I got in there. Then slept until 8:00 this morning! She's down for nap #1 and so far it's been almost an hour! Maybe things are getting...never mind, don't want to jinx it!! Thanks to you all for being there for me!

JODY---HUGS to you for your rough day. And I'm glad today is better. I know what you mean about feeling like a horrible mother about the way you feel sometimes. I think we've all been there, and I think that's what makes this board so important to all of us...the support!!

MICHELLE--yeah for Molly's first day at "school" and a great night!!! And what's with you, Jody &  Micky sneaking off to a spa without the rest of us?!?! We want to go!!!    (Seriously, wouldn't that be great if we could all get away and go together!!)

ANDREA & TRACI (and anyone else for that matter)--the pages I mentioned in BWSAYP about the routine for 6-9 months are pages 36-39 (in the EASY section, not the emotions section...hope I didn't have you searching the whole book!)

MICKY--love the pics! How cute is he!!

JUDY--I am also guilty of ranting at an 8-month old. I admit it sometimes helps me feel better, but I know someday she will be able to understand even more what I'm saying, so I should learn to be patient now.

HAYLEY--Liv isn't really crying at mealtimes, but she has been fussier than usual. It seems like she's less interested in the cereal and more interested in finger food. She seems to do pretty well with the jarred foods, but all but refuses cereal and formula sometimes. I think she wants more variety now.

Has anyone else's LO started refusing the bottle and/or cereal? Have you dropped a bottle or cereal? I think it's still a little too early to do so, but if she keeps refusing it, I feel like I'm just wasting it all.

MACAIRE--[[[[[[[HUGS]]]]]] to you for your rough morning. I have been there. It's no fun, but as DH always tells me, "remember this, too will pass." (Sorry if it ticks you off as much as it does me sometimes when he says it!  ) I also suffered the whole identity loss issue when I stopped working. I had planned to work from home, then 1 week before I left for maternity leave my boss told me that wasn't going to work out. We definitely wanted one of us to be home with her, so I ended up quitting altogether (DH makes more, so it made sense). I am doing some freelance now, and that's going great, but it's not the same as having a career and prestige, etc.) It's sometimes hard at the end of the day to realize all I've accomplished is laundry, cooking, and cleaning....which will all have to be done again tomorrow!! I know motherhood is the most important job, but sometimes it doesn't feel like it! I've noticed it does help for me to get out...go to a mom's group, out to coffee with friends, or just get out and go to the mall or for a walk. It helps me feel like I'm still connected to society.

I also forgot to mention all of Liv's accomplishments in the midst of my desperate pleas for help. In the last week she has started:

1. Commando crawling
2. Waving
3. Clapping
4. Has 2 more teeth...for a total of 6!

I also forgot to mention the FABULOUS gift she got from my parents (I know we're kind of past the whole Christmas gift conversation, but I have to brag on the grandparents!). They MADE her (from scratch) a toybox/bookshelf combo. It's so cool, and the greatest part is...I had NO IDEA they could do anything like that. When they said they made something for her, I got really scared, b/c I've never known my dad to make anything of wood. But it's BEAUTIFUL!! And I know she'll treasure it always.

Well, my fingers are getting tired, and I'm sure you're tired of reading by now, so I think that's it...just wanted to get caught up. Sorry for such a long post!!

[solnme]

Good morning Ladies!

Micky - LOL at Jack!  He looks like the King of that party. BTW, Sol is bathing again, TFA.  He's in the big tub and really loves the room. Both DH and I have to be there though or he fusses and looks for the missing parent.

Jody/ Andrea - {{Hugs}} Those Mommy blues are creeping into this house too.  I layed in bed this morning listening to the crying lo and wished myself on the beach. (Jo) the bathroom just wasn't far enough away.
Yay on Taylor's leaps!

Hayley - Snap!!! I could have written your post.  Yes Sol has started crying after and sometimes during meals.  This morning he started crying in the middle of breakfast.  I gave him some water and he settled down so I tried a little more food.  He ended up eating it all.  :shock:  I'm trying to remind myself to use the signs for "all done" and "drink" more since his crying seems to be more communicative. 

Erin - Weird dream.  These developmental milestones mean they are moving closer to independence.  I used to dread it going so fast but am feeling more ambivalence now.

Macaire - I think I'm feeling a lot like you.  I also mourned the absence of DH yesterday when he went back to work.  The house was so empty.
I had to drop in to my old workplace yesterday and everyone was so happy to see me and it was awsome to talk about topics other than baby. (aka office gossip)  I really thought I was done with that job but I really miss the interaction and the sense of accomplishment I got from working.  I know it would be hard to leave Sol but I know we'd both adjust with time.  So I'm now plagued with thoughts of 'Do I really want to work from home?' 

It's a yucky place.    Thanks for listening.

[Nikki~Nathan&Danielle]

Morning everyone! 

Nancy, what a fab gift for your dad to make for Olivia.    Sounds like things are getting better *fingers crossed* for you.

More hugs to those with rough nights {{Hugs}}

We still had a waking around 5am, I know I said I wasn't going to feed,  :roll: but it's a really bad time for trying to resettle since it's close to Nathan's wake up time, so did a quick feed and they both woke at 6am, so I'm sure I'll get there anyway.

What is it with non-sleeping babies - the number of times I've thought when one child isn't going to sleep WELL JUST LET ME LIE DOWN IN YOUR WARM, SOFT, QUIET, SNUGGY BED THEN AND SLEEP!!!  In fact I wouldn't care half the time if it was on the hard floor with no blankets.

Gotta go, will check in later.

[Nikki~Nathan&Danielle]

Nancy, meant to say - how cool of Liv doing all those new things!  It's so exciting when you see their little minds try to work something out and then see how proud they are of their achievements.

[Olivia's Mommy]

OK, must be quick...someone is waking up and will be hungry. Just wanted to post a couple of pics from our holiday.

The first one is of Liv sitting IN her new toybox Grandpa made.
The second one sums up Liv's whole attitude by the last day of our trip. (we couldn't resist!)

[Olivia's Mommy]

OK, I've GOT to figure out how to post my pics smaller...sorry!!!

[Colesmom]

nancy-if you're using photobucket and i think you are...you can resize them...choose 25% of original and repost the image code

[Erin M]

Nancy - LOL, I couldn't figure out why the web page was so wide until I made it down to life-sized Liv!  No biggie though - glad to hear last night went b*tt*r (will that keep from jinxing it?).  Yay for all of Liv's accomplishments - Katie just started clapping too and it cracks me up.  Oh, and Katie's noon bottle is pretty much hit or miss - she almost never takes more than 2-3 ounces.  She was that way with the BF before I switched over and for a bit she'd take more from the bottle, but not anymore.  We're pretty much done with that feed - and she'll be 10 months on Friday (where does the time go?)  Today I just gave her water in a sippy cup and she drank some of that.

Nikki, I'm with you, in the middle of the night I would gladly sleep just about anywhere, floor included - I once laid down on the floor with Katie to try to get her back to sleep - she was having no part of it though.

Cathy (((hugs))) for your rough night (is the moon full or something?) and my DH has no idea what to do in the middle of the night either (those 2 or 3 times he's actually gotten up).

Ankie - (((hugs)))) to you too.  That Arwyn is a tough cookie these days. 

Macaire - I had to laugh at your sheet tent (sorry, I'm sure it was anything but funny at the time).  I know EXACTLY how you feel....though I never have resorted to tents....I'll have to give that a try. 

Today, we are enjoying being at home - it seems like we spent every day in December running around crazily, so Katie is having two naps at home for a change and I've been catching up on some stuff.  I was on the phone with the insurance company before and they have one of those annoying voice activated menu systems - every time I got to where I wanted, Katie would yell blah, blah, blah (or one of her many other sayings) and the phone would say "I'm sorry, I didn't understand you" and go back to the main menu.  Frustrating, but very funny.

My best friend from NC had her baby the other day and I just got some pics.  She had a beautiful little boy.  I'm so excited for her, but I so do NOT miss having a newborn.  I like now MUCH better.

[Colesmom]

macaire-I so hear you on the "just go to bed what is your problem"  *sigh* i want to crawl under the covers every day.  apparently they just don't understand our frustration.  btw-my hat off to you for going to gym at 5am!  holy smokes girlie, that is dedication.

Arwyn is suffering from Short Nap Syndrome and Multiple Night Waking Disorder

  Ankie-even exhausted you manage to maintain your sense of humour.  I suppose you need to to get through your days.

Traci... Girlfriend, you and I have to just escape and sleep for a night or two. If you feel comfortable with it, just continue to feed Cole once in the night. My doctor says that some babies just need to be fed and can't make it through the night until over 1 year. I know it is not very BW advice but you, my friend, have been at it for a long time and Cole doesn't seem to be able to go without a feed. He sounds super active and maybe his body just needs more. BTW, do you know if he is waking due to moving around? I find that if I "pseudo-swaddle" Arwyn, she falls asleep faster. I hold her over my shoulder, put the blanket on her and tuck the two ends between her and I so that her arms can't move. DH is able to restrain both arms just while holding her but my limbs are not long enough

  He is in a grobag.  I think my issue is purely A time and has been for a long long while now.  I just thought it was the frigging teeth.  I think you're right...if he will go to 4:00-4:30, then feed, then up for day around 6 I would be a VERY happy girl.

Nancy-thanks for the page numbers...will look it up later.  Love the pics.  Poor little thing in the second...not a happy little girl.  what a wonderful gift btw.

Cathy-have you tried double diapering...or in the states you can get Huggies Goodnights...worth a try?

gotta go, nap ending (i just held him for 30 min to extend)  oh well.

[Colesmom]

me again.

Judy-with your short/no windown for the girls...what are they doing before that.  Are you sure to keep everything quiet?  i'm just curious as I wasn't 100% sure what time to put Cole down for nap 2 today.  I starting winding him down and tried for A of 3 hours and he fought, so A of 3:15 and he fought...then slept at A of 3:30...but only for 40 minutes.  I managed to extend once but left the room too soon and he woke again and I held him for 30 minutes to be sure he had a decent nap.  Anyhoo, what I'm saying is...even though he went to sleep after 3:30 A time I think because we were doing quiet activities for about 30 minutes he wasn't tired enough.  phew-took me a while to get to the point.

I know I was going to do nap 2 at 2:30 but that would have been 3:45 hours A and I thought that too long.  hmmm, not sure.  anyhoo, aiming for bed of 6:15-6:30.  wish me luck everyone.  I'll be back here shortly thereafter.

see...now that I'm back you just can't get rid of me :wink:

[Olivia's Mommy]

Nikki--thanks! And yes, it is so cool to see all the new developments at this stage! It makes all the other crap (night wakings, short naps, etc.) so much more worthwhile.

Traci--thanks for the photo tip. I'll try to remember to reduce the size next time. Good luck tonight!

Erin--congrats to your friend on her newborn!! I know what you mean...I'd rather have the problems I have now than to go back to that phase. Although, we do want more children, so I'll be there again someday....ugh!!

[Judy]

Sean and I cannot even sit at the table without them litterally climbing all over your legs...I can't give them enough of what we have! Please tell me that this stops??

Well I'm sure it does - but um well not by 3.5yrs in our house  :?

Ok Nikki, and anyone with ideas actually, give me some UP thoughts here.  The girls (Z&S) are having a snack of granola bars.  Zoe's has some peanut butter on the top and Sarah's has almond butter on it.  Zoe asked Sarah for a bite of hers and Sarah said no.  Fair enough (there would have been no more willingness the other way).  So Zoe snatches Sarah's and takes a bite anyway leaving Sarah in tears.  I'm feeding so I couldn't grab it fast enough.  Ok so I pick up Zoe's which is on the table and give a bite to Sarah - fair enough right?  Well Zoe get's mad and SPITS OUT the bite she took onto the carpet. :shock:  how not to get p!ssed off?  I AM p!ssed off.  I told her she needed to clean up every last bit before I gave her the remaining part of her bar.  She's lying on the floor claiming to be too hungry to clean it up.  I mean honestly - what is this a freakin' barn?  I know I'm just p!ssy and not in the right frame of mind for this right now.  SO of course instead I'm ranting at her about it.

Ugh!  Where's the cyber grunting emoticon??

[Nikki~Nathan&Danielle]

Judy, I'm sorry but you had me snorting my cup of tea over the barn remark!    I'm just logging off, I've been on here waaay too long and we need to get out of the house.  Will ponder on this, because I sometimes get a similar situation and well my hot-headed response still comes out.  :roll: