To me that was done as a pay-back (and too right :wink: ) which to me also translates to punishment for Zoe for snatching.
YES!! Very school-girlish of me eh? I thought of this last night in the shower (I do a lot of revisiting the day in the shower
) and realized I was in a very "so there!" sorta mood and of course she reacted. Zoe picked her flavour bar, Sarah seemed not to care. I guess I could have stepped in and said "Hey Sarah, maybe Zoe would give you a taste of hers if you give her a bite of yours" and Zoe would have either agreed or decided against needing the bite in the first place. I was nursing at the time - I find that a real trigger time for me because I don't feel like having to get up and get involved helping them, I just want to enjoy the time to SIT. Anyway I get annoyed at saying things and being 'ignored' - it really bugs me. I imagine this is something I need to solve for myself, their 2 & 3, it's their job to ignore me, perhaps it's something left over from my own growing up and not being listened to??? Who knows. Anyway, Zoe had reached for the bar a couple times and stopped when I'd said not to without consent from Sarah. Then picked it up and bit it all the while ignoring my insistence she NOT do it. :roll:
So the nursing - also why I was so darn insistent she clean it up. Usually if I just ask and let her do it in her own timing she will without all the fuss. I've explained that if she leaves it too long (say overnight) that ants and bugs will attract to it.... so eventually she asked on her own if the ants would come to get it by morning... so she gets this and doesn't need my harassing her.
Interesting eh? I wanted to blame her for the whole BIGness of the incident and yet it was MY reaction that set the tone. So often that's it isn't it? *sigh* another lesson learned for next time - and there's always a next time for trying again isn't there?
Thanks so much for your input.
I like the idea of letting them work things out and often have - but Sarah is in a real hitting/hair pulling phase when she gets frustrated with Zoe (who is in a real grab and dash phase with Sarah's things) So Zoe often just sits there crying while Sarah stands there and hits her repeatedly or pulls her hair. Finally today though Zoe did once get up and walk away toward me. That's always my line "Hitting hurts people. Your sister doesn't deserve to be hit" and to the victim "If it were me, I'd move away from someone who was hitting me"
Judy, do you find it difficult to read the Discipline forum lately now that you follow UP? I just find unless someone understands and wants to come from a UP POV, it would be hard to give advise.
Yup! In fact I often don't even read over there anymore (you know how hard it is for me to keep quiet!!). I get thoughts and worry that when I DO pipe up and give my opinion it sounds very judging. It's very 'normal' to assume a child is wrong or spoiled and needs to be punished so coming at it any other way can be frustrating for parents. I think I annoy people with my discipline input - or so I've thought in the past anyway. It IS interesting though to see that people DO assume children to be motivated to do 'bad' things rather than being curious. See now I'll be curious to go peak over there... and then I'll be compelled to reply to something.... Can you just guess that in real life I talk A LOT? :oops: :lol:
Andrea: I haven't had AF yet. Thankfully.
Not sure when the girls will go to 3bf a day... gosh I wonder if they'll ever wean!! At night before bed dh often takes them out of the bath for me - since Sarah usually has jumped in with them. So he'll take them and get them dressed and wait for me. As SOON as they see me they start to fuss and whine and cry till I pick them up. Same thing happens if I go out on a weekend shopping. They'll be fine playing and I can come in and put stuff away but as soon as they see me and I talk to them they smile... then CRY till I pick them up.
Erin: I'd go! Especially if she's on bottles and dh can handle it all. GO and ENJOY!!
Should go get this day started. We have a pedi/needle appt today. :cry: DH wasn't sure last night he'd be able to sneak out of work to help - yikes.. FOUR girls in a SMALL space where NONE of them will want to be... I think *I* will need some chamomilla before this one.
