Author Topic: March/April '05 Thread #4  (Read 93833 times)

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Nikki~Nathan&Danielle

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March/April '05 Thread #4
« Reply #60 on: December 31, 2005, 20:47:28 pm »
We posted at the same time Hayley, as far as DH's - well he's never read a parenting/discipline book he's happy to let me lead the way since we're both pretty much on the same track anyway.  I was reading UP yesterday and talking about some of the things in it and I find giving him analogies work best for him to absorb what I'm talking about.  Because we have this forum and we're basically living and breathing this stuff I find I just soak it up and there's no way he'd get the same level of understanding.  So yep, a bit of modelling but also explaining stuff as a situation arises.   Simon is still quite a way away from understanding it all though.

Sounds like you had a nice NYE.

Offline Little Bear's Mum

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March/April '05 Thread #4
« Reply #61 on: December 31, 2005, 20:48:38 pm »
Karen and Nikki posted while I was writing.

Karen, thanks for the quiche recipe, I was hoping it was your porridge/congee recipe. Could you post that too? Sorry if you've done it before but I missed it.

Nikki, yes the book you mentioned is what I've got. I must read it and see what it has to say but sounds like it won't be much good after all. I like the sounds of the book mentioned in the written interview from Bec's posting.

TTFN.
Hayley
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Nikki~Nathan&Danielle

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March/April '05 Thread #4
« Reply #62 on: December 31, 2005, 20:51:16 pm »
LOL Hayley.  I think it's probably still worth a read, reason why I say that, is you do get little titbits from all these book (in fact if you're wondering about Love & Logic then I think this is similar) - it's good to have those other tools under your belt or at least be able to make a conscious decision to NOT do some of the stuff suggested kwim?

Offline Little Bear's Mum

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March/April '05 Thread #4
« Reply #63 on: December 31, 2005, 20:53:16 pm »
Thanks Nikki.

And Karen, I just got your PM. So please disregard previous message on here.

 :D
Hayley
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Offline becca24

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March/April '05 Thread #4
« Reply #64 on: December 31, 2005, 22:26:57 pm »
Happy New Year Everyone!!  :D

Well I had a BIG night - Asleep at 9.20pm  :roll: Meanwhile my best friends - Selina and twins Alison & Jane - are down in Sydney watching the fireworks on the Harbour Bridge from on top of a building  :cry: Oh well maybe next year  8)

This morning at 7.30 Halle and I walked up and had a cuppa and toast with my grandparents for breakfast. I got THEM out of bed. OMG what a turn around. I remember the days when they would be dragging my bum out of bed at 8.00 because I had 'slept in' LOL

Judy - I think I will buy that book, maybe I will get some reading in next week while we are on holidays. I thought the holding bit was weird as well but it seems I am holding her against her will to dress her all the time  :lol:  :roll:

Hayley - so cute about your little NY'c cuddle  :)  Not sure what I am going to do about getting DH on board with the parenting stuff. I am still trying to tell him not to say the dog's name and NO in the same sentence after 3 years  :roll: He is walking around saying "ABBY, NO" all the time - the poor puppy doesn't know if she is coming or going :roll: 

It is probably going to be hard getting others on board with it as well. I could tell my Mum was biting her tongue the other day. Halle was opening and closing the little cupboard doors underneath the telly. Mum was telling her "No NOOOO  Halle Nooooo" Then she looked at me and said "Becca, tell her No, she can't do that" I said it's Ok Mum because that is going to be full of her stuff anyway, so it's her cupboard!  Well mum just did this  :roll: . LOL She thinks you shouldn't have to move anything because kids shouldn't touch- meanwhile everytime we go shopping she is grabbing everything !! If she can't do it, how does she expect a little baby to do it ??  LOL

Another filthy hot day today  :x DH has gone fishing (double  :evil:  :evil: ).

Offline Arwyn's mom

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March/April '05 Thread #4
« Reply #65 on: December 31, 2005, 22:50:47 pm »
Hello all...

Micky... Your sis will be eating her words, I tell ya. It sure is frustrating though for people to say that kind of stuff all the time. I have friends and family who think I am nuts for "letting" Arwyn sleep at certain times and so early at night. Anyhow, hope she doesn't have an Angel baby. I have a friend who schleps her kid everywhere and claims there isn't a problem with his sleep. He only sleeps 45 min in his own crib but will sleep for over 2 hours in his carseat. :roll: Oh, no... no problem there!

And... does DH know you are sharing his letters :wink: with your BW friends? Lucky you... he sounds like he really misses you.

Hayley... AWWWW... what a wonderful way to start 2006!

Karen... knackered Sam... poor baby... sometimes we are just victims of our own success, aren't we? BTW, I did the same thing for our family dinner... don't think I will be invited to another one anytime soon. And we have the same hoo hoo resolution :shock: .

Bec... What? no champagne on NYE?  :wink:

Nikki... Hmmm... I kinda like Grandma's rule... of course, I haven't had to use it with Arwyn but I do use it at school all the time. Some kids do very well with it and some don't. However... school IS different. There are certain things the students MUST complete. Now that I have written that... I will probably use it with Arwyn. :roll:

Okay... somebody said to watch for if Arwyn is sleepy at the wrong times to know if there may be some residual injuries from her fall down the stairs. Does being awake at the wrong times count? :roll:  My darling miss was awake from 10 pm to 1 am last night. Both DH and I tried to put her back down. I nursed, I rocked, I jiggled, I paced, I lay down with her, etc. No go... Finally, DH had to hold her to sleep on his chest. :roll: So... my guess is that she is just fine :roll: as she woke at 5 am... fed and slept until 6:30 am and then decided it was time to start our day. Sheesh... and then has the nerve to only sleep for 45 minutes for nap #1.
Ankie
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Offline becca24

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March/April '05 Thread #4
« Reply #66 on: December 31, 2005, 23:00:06 pm »
Ankie - I can't believe she was awake for three hours in the middle of the night  :shock: 

Richelle - No it's not very Humid here but I am sure Jo and Lisa would be getting the humidity up in Queensland. The poor things  8)  How terrible it would be to live in QLD  :lol:   :wink: Just Kidding I LOVE IT !


Let's all post our New Years Resolutions. Here's mine:

 :arrow: CHILL OUT
 :arrow: Remeber to apply moisturiser to my face every day :roll:
 :arrow: Still thinking........................

Offline Little Bear's Mum

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March/April '05 Thread #4
« Reply #67 on: December 31, 2005, 23:34:21 pm »
Okay Bec you've challenged me.... I got home last night and I saw my tummy in the mirror and OMG I thought I looked about 4 months pregnant!!!! It's fairly small in the mornings but by the end of the day it's a little mountain on it's side again!  :oops: I have always been blessed/lucky enough to NEVER have to exercise and eat what I like and have a flat tummy and weigh about 55kgs. BUT NOT ANYMORE! The rest of my body is pre-pregnancy but not my tummy. If I suck it in it nearly all goes away, but if I don't it's really obvious. So I'm going to start exercising my tummy today. We've got a gym on base which I can use for free, so it's jsut a matter of making the time and effort to go there. DH points out I can do exercises for my tummy at home, byu t I don't. jdj   n h x (no I'm not drinking, that's Daniel's contribution to my typing). So my new year resolution....

Flatten my tummy by exercising every day

That's it, I only want to think about one extra thing to do and if I can achieve that goal I'll be over the moon!

Question for you. Daniel's not interested in my home made cooking and will only eat tinned/jarred food. What do I do? Originally it was mostly all my own pureed veges with the odd tin, then as Christmas came along and I'd run out of veges I started using more jars. Also, I couldn't get my head around doing meat for him, so the prepared stuff was good. But now he just won't eat what I cook. I've tried pureeing, and having more chunky, as he eats  more chunky jarred stuff, but it doesn't seem to make any difference. Previously he loved apricot chicken I made and now he won't touch it. He's not really into finger food that much, but I'm trying to give him more to try, he managed some bananas today. It's not a teething issue as he'll eat bought stuff. HELP. Any ideas appreciated.

Better go still in PJ's and it's 12.30pm! Nice though!
Hayley
Ohakea, New Zealand



Judy

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March/April '05 Thread #4
« Reply #68 on: January 01, 2006, 00:22:03 am »
Quote (selected)
Judy, what are your thoughts on Grandma's Rule?

I don't use that tactic but I don't think it would work either on my girls.  I can see it being very tempting if it did work.  What I might do though is ask the girls to say clean up the puzzles and if they didn't and I really wanted them cleaned up for me then I'd do it myself but perhaps explain that we'll do what they want in a bit, first I'm needing to clean some things up (but this would get a big no no on the UP site because I'm still being manipulative - but I'm ok with it since it is something that is important to me... otherwise if the house is in total chaos I tend to get irritable, so better to make them wait and be manipulative that way I guess than to be crabby IMO)  I remember once over a year ago when Zoe made a mess of 6puzzles and I asked her to clean it up.  She refused so I tried "grandma's rule" I guess (never heard of it though) and made some chocolate pudding and said she could have some after the puzzles were cleaned up..... she LOVES chocolate anything.  Anyway........... *I* finally cleaned up the puzzles a couple DAYS later. 

Quote (selected)
Judy, is is scary to think the girls are wanting to be on the computer already?

Gosh Zoe watches what I do very closely and she can open a new email message, click into the body of the message, then change the text size to 36 and type to her hearts' content - all without my help!! :shock:.  I also had her up at Nick jr. today and she was happily playing different games all on her own.  I can sit on the couch and say "ok click where it says O K, now click on Cancel, it starts with a C" and she can follow all my instructions really well. :)  Amazing!!  Sarah just clicks like mad constantly :)

Hayley my dh won't read a parenting book.  He doesn't really read much of anything and when he does he just falls asleep (which is why he usually doesn't bother).  I did get the UP dvd though, haven't watched it yet and he said he would probably watch it.  Who knows when though.  He generally says he follows my lead... and so since I'm not perfect :oops: he tends to follow the negative things I do... well he follows it all but if I point out something he's done that isn't the best approach it always comes back on me "well I'm only following YOUR lead".  Generallly I don't send them to their room for anything but every once in a while I get stuck in a moment and it comes out... then he'll do it and blame me... I really just wish he was full on trying to do the UP thing and could then step in when I was stuck.  But overall yes I hope that modelling works on him too ;)  I think as he sees the girls reactions becoming better to things and them being happier and being able to live their own lives he'll follow suit better and better, as will I.

Well it's 7.20pm NY Eve here.  Zoe has fallen asleep on the couch, Sarah has taken herself to bed, Kaia and Hannah are just finishing up their feed and off to bed :)  Ahhhhhhhhh... I'm going to go have a nice warm bath till say 8pm, have a tea, maybe work on a puzzle I bought myself or watch a movie I also bought myself :)  I imagine dh will be asleep on the couch by the time I'm done in the bath :lol:  oh - I hear him pulling the blinds in our room - means he's going to hop in the shower - well all I have to say is he better be quick so I can get my bath on the go!! :)

Happy New Year gals!!!  Wierd to think that for some of you 2006 is already here!

Offline kate585

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March/April '05 Thread #4
« Reply #69 on: January 01, 2006, 01:25:22 am »
Happy New Year!
We are waiting for our friends to bring us takeout (PF Changs!  Yummy!!! :D ) and then we're off to a party while my mom stays with Ryan.  He is already asleep, but has been waking up a lot, so we'll see. 

 :?: What is all this hoo hoo talk about?  I mean, I know what a hoo hoo is, but what are these resolutions?

My resolutions:
Lose 10 pounds and firm up before out trip!  (MIL and SIL will look really good in their bikinis, so I must try to compete.   8) )
Call friends and family more often.  (So easy to let months slide by and haven't talked to some people).
I think I'll steal Bec's "CHILL OUT."  I need it!

Micky, can't wait to hear about your sis's baby.  I agree with Judy, she'll have the easiest angel baby...but just wait for that second one to knock her feet out from under her. 

Oh, man.  Our friends just called and they're on the way, so must dash and make sure the house doesn't look like complete doo doo.  (Another resolution:  cutting out my cursing.  Now, I'm setting myself up for failure!   :D )
Kate,


Offline mickymuscles

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March/April '05 Thread #4
« Reply #70 on: January 01, 2006, 03:14:33 am »
hi girls!

HAPPY NEW YEARS TO YOU ALL!! :D  I hope for a nice relaxing year, with a sleeping baby, and to be pg in the summer!

The hoo hoo resolutions are related to our chat last night Kate.  We got on talking about Brazilian waxes...who does, who doesn't, who would like too but is too chicken, etc.  So those of us that are saying they are going to have new hoo hoos in the new year I think are going to be brave enough to go for a Brazilian vs. the Euro Bush.  I, myself have not made up my mind yet...I still think I'm afraid of my lips being ripped off!  :shock:  :lol:

talk to you all soon!
micky
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Offline Erin M

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March/April '05 Thread #4
« Reply #71 on: January 01, 2006, 04:32:09 am »
HAPPY NEW YEAR!  It's about 11 PM here on the Eve right now. 

DH, Katie, and I made it back around 7:30 - a normally 6.5 hour car trip turned itself into about a 9 hour one back from the ILs due to loads of snow and ice on the roads (how does that sound Bec - so different from your 105!) - bunch of accidents (happily not us this time!), etc, etc - fortunaely Katie was quite the trooper - I sat in the back with her for a good part of the trip just to entertain her.  She has LOADS of new toys from all the family we've been seeing. 

Hmmm....sorry I missed chat last night, sounds as if it was quite interesting  :wink:

Thoughts about recent conversation....
ADHD/TV - I've got loads of thoughts on ADHD, don't really know if it results from TV or not, but I would tend to think it has some sort of genetic link, as most of the kids who I have taught who are truly ADHD seem to have parents whose behavior is remarkably similar to their childrens'.  Interestingly enough, they recently discovered the gene (well, genes, I think it was more than one) responsibly for dyslexia, so it does seem as if a good deal of it does have some sort of genetic basis.  They can do such ridiculously cool stuff with brain scans these days, it's nice to be able to prove things like learning disabilities really do exist instead of just blaming the kids for not working hard enough.

Another tangent -- I said "truly ADHD" above because I tend to think it gets overdiagnosed - kids are just active kids, or have some other sort of issue or just need a different kind of learning environment and they get slapped with the ADHD label and put on medication -- which is also so overused these days too.  I don't doubt it exists though and that medication can benefit some kids, as I've worked with some kids who truly are ADHD and who are helped tremendously with medication.  Has to be such a hard decision for the parents though - I always think about what would happen if Katie's teachers wanted her labeled and put in special ed. 

I always wonder if the ADHD label/TV link comes from the fact that some people let their kids watch WAY too much TV (as in, not a few Dora videos, but the parents who let the kids have a TV in their room when they're 6 and watch whatever whenever) which in turn can lead to them not having enough sleep, which can certainly lead to behavior problems.  I worked with a 3rd grader once who was having all sorts of trouble in school - turns out the kid went to bed around 11 every night - his parents said something like "well, he just doesn't want to and we don't know how to make him" - but with such a severe lack of sleep, he was such a behavior issue - no impulse control, no ability to handle things,  you get the picture....

The point is, I think ADHD has to do with a whole lot of things and blaming it solely on watching TV when kids are little is, IMO, thinking way too narrowly. 

All this being said, I think I miss my hyperactive 8th graders that I used to teach  :D

Anyway, I'm off - almost 11:30 now, I've had my NYE glass of wine (which may explain the rambling above, though it all does seem to make sense - one glass of wine goes A LOT farther than it used to  :D )

Hope everyone is doing well!
I've enjoyed seeing all the pics, and reading about everyone's holidays (though Ankie and Cathy, I did not enjoy the stories about your LOs sad accidents! - glad to hear things seem to be better!)

Oh, New Year's Resolution--
EXERCISE AND EAT BETTER!!! - DH and I are getting a treadmill as a Christmas present to each other - I think I weigh more now than I did when Katie was 3 months old - lots of crappy eating and not enough exercise, but will change all that with the new year!

Nikki~Nathan&Danielle

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March/April '05 Thread #4
« Reply #72 on: January 01, 2006, 06:45:37 am »
Erin, it's so interesting to hear a teachers POV on the whole ADHD thing.

Micky

Quote (selected)
I still think I'm afraid of my lips being ripped off!

ROFTLMAO!!

Judy, I do find Grandma's Rule (wonder why they called it that?) does work and I'll reserve it for just a few situations like tidying up the house or to get him to eat some more dinner before getting some fruit (I know, I know probably a bad one).  I don't think I'd do it if he refused and it became a big drama because then what would I be resorting to???

I have so got to stop swearing at home.  This morning Nathan was walking around saying "Butterfly" over and over for about 5mins, I thought he'd seen one outside and how sweet it was, then I noticed him following a big blowfly around the house that he was really saying "bloody fly"  :oops: , guess I hate flys, didn't even really realise that I say that...

Well we had a really nice busy day out, so tired though, but both kids survived well on about 20mins nap this afternoon.

Offline Little Bear's Mum

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March/April '05 Thread #4
« Reply #73 on: January 01, 2006, 08:52:57 am »
Hi, it's quiet on here today.

Erin, good to hear you're safe and sound at home now. What a pain having the road trip take soooo long. Well done Katie!

Interesting comments about ADHD. I've often wondered if a lot of kids are suffering from too much sugar and preservatives/colourings etc which then causes overactive emotions and actions. IYKWIM. I have a friend whose son ate alot of bought quick food, like chicken nuggets etc and when she changed his diet his temperament changed for the better. She sees the difference in him as soon as he eats 'junk' food. He's still full of energy and character, but he doesn't have the tantrums as much.

Daniel didn't want his dinner again tonight, so I gave him some cheese to eat with his fingers and resorted to turning on BE. Both helped (I think) and I reheated the food so it was hotter. After a definite closed mouth and rubbing his face (sign of not wanting food) for the first little while, he ended up eating the whole lot! Half a can of food plus 1 cube of my veges. I'm not sure what did the trick, so I'm going to try with just finger food tomorrow night and see if he likes that. The strange thing was he was still really grizzly after dinner and so after about 45 mins we gave him some custard and he ate the whole tin, so he'd still been hungry. Therefore hunger (or lack of) isn't the issue. It must be something else. But what? Here are my thoughts on what could be the matter, any feedback appreciated.

 :arrow: wants to feed himself, even though he's not previously been very interested in finger foods, maybe he is now.

 :arrow: feeding dinner too early, not hungry enough (lunch is at 11.30am, dinner at 4.30pm)

 :arrow: bored with plain veges/meat, needs more seasoning as this is what the jars/tins are like

 :arrow: food too cold

I know these little ones are always changing, but why is it just when you get one thing sorted something else crops up? Can't they just eat, sleep and poop just as they should for a little while??? LOL.

Oh and the good news is Daniel now has 4 teeth. Yay!

Off to bed now for an earlyish night. 9.52pm, does that count as early?
Hayley
Ohakea, New Zealand



Judy

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March/April '05 Thread #4
« Reply #74 on: January 01, 2006, 11:25:11 am »
Mornin' Gals and Happy New Year.  It's 6.20am and I am up feeding already.  I went to bed at 11pm last night with a horribly sore throat, could barely swallow.  At 3am dh convinced me that it would be much quicker to go to emerg in the middle of the night than during the daylight hours and if I had strep (no other symptoms of anything just can barely swallow) I would need antibiotics. Soooooooo -  I've just arrived home :(  Dr. said yup likely strep.  Man it's painful.  Wouldn't you know last night at supper I was feeding the babies off my spoon - only the second time ever that I've fed them off my spoon - well here's to hoping and praying they won't get it.  Or the older two who drink out of my glass as a regular habit.  I try to convince them they shouldn't ever drink out of someone else's glass as often you don't know you are sick till it's too late... :roll:

Nikki - hey if the rule works for you then yeah I'd use it.   I just have never had success with it (unless of course we're offering ice cream after dinner :))