Author Topic: wont sleep in bed  (Read 1029 times)

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Offline prncss

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wont sleep in bed
« on: January 04, 2006, 10:13:44 am »
Hello, I am new here and just finished the book... i have to admit I have no idea how to implement it. My son is 10 weeks old and was sleeping in his bed (basket next to our bed) fairly well from the ageo of 6 weeks (we co slpet until then) Now he wont sleep more than 30 minutes in the basket. I pick him up and he falls asleep on me but if I lay him down again he fusses and ends up crying... at which point i feel the only way to get him to stop is to feed him He refuses the paci... i cant seem to get him on a sleep schedule and i really need to. This little man can feed hourly as well... He does nto nap during the day as well as he should either. He only takes maybe 3 naps between 9am and 9pm. none of the naps last more than an hour. i know he is tored but how do you force a child to sleep? Help!


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FrasersMum

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wont sleep in bed
« Reply #1 on: January 04, 2006, 23:13:31 pm »
Hi prncss

Welcome to the boards.

Sounds like you are having a bit of a rough time.  I want to try and help you out but first I have a couple of questions for you.

Now that you have read Tracy's book, have you started to try and implement EASY?  What does your day time look like?  I know you said that you are having trouble with day time naps as well, but what day time sleep are you getting and how much?

Do you do a winddown with your DS?  What does that look like?

Do you have a bedtime routine? Can you describe that to me?

Can you give me an idea of what/when/how many night wakings you are having and what you are doing when your DS wakes in the night.

Have you been using pat/ssshh at bedtimes to try and help your DS fall asleep?  When did you start and have you had any success?

When did you move your DS out of your bed and into the basket beside your bed?  Do you think the basket is big enough for him, enough room for him to be comfortable?

Sorry for all the questions - hopefully we'll be able to come up with a plan for you when we get a better picture of what is happening.

Cheers
Jo

Offline prncss

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« Reply #2 on: January 05, 2006, 19:02:26 pm »
okay, my days vary.we are up between 8 and 9. (He feeds at between 5-6 and then we have snuggel time in bed together) he stays until between 11 and 12. then a nap for 30 min or less then up. (He is feeding about every 2 hrs) he really does not nap a lot or for long.  There is really no reoutine. When feeding i read to him and focus on the feedings (most of the time... sometimes i have to get some things done on line). We do have activity time... on the play mat or in his bouncy chair or swing. Did i mention that he had open heart surgery 4 weeks ago and is recovering from a resp infection as well? I know that has much to do with where he is right now. He is small for his age... i think he fits in his basket... I moved hime there after the hospital 4 weeks ago.  a typical night goes like this... we have quiet time... usally a feeding then a bath then holding time... pat and ssssh (Only if he is crying) then to bedroom. It is dimly lit at all times. We listen to lullibyes (music on sometimes all night) one more feed until he sleeps then to basket. This sleep lasts for 3-5 hrs then up every 2 hrs to feed. He wakes quietly, never crying loudly... just cooing and sicking his hands. He hates the paci though we are trying it more now. Every 2 hrs it is the same. The only time he gets out of control crying is with his diaper change at night. I hope this helps as I need help getting him to sleep more. Even day sleeps... Again, how do you force a 10 week old to sleep? THANK YOU!


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FrasersMum

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« Reply #3 on: January 06, 2006, 10:52:35 am »
Hi prncess,

I know you've posted questions in a number of different boards and I don't want to confuse you by everyone giving you a different bit of advice, but my suggestions would be:

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okay, my days vary.we are up between 8 and 9.

Tracy suggests that, particularly when you are trying to establish a routine, you pick a regular wake up time and stick to that every day.  Most mums have a wake up time around 7am, but you need to pick a time that works best for you and your DS.

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he stays until between 11 and 12. then a nap for 30 min or less then up. (He is feeding about every 2 hrs) he really does not nap a lot or for long.

If your DS is waking up at 8 and going down for a nap at 11, that is a 3 hour A time.  That is a long time for a LO of your DS's age.  I would recommend that you have a look at the sample routines at the top of the EASY board which will help to give you an idea of how long other 10 week olds are staying awake.  I would think that at 10 weeks A time would be around an hour and a half.  One of the big reasons that your DS will be having short naps is if he is overtired - and I suspect that with a 3 hour A time he probably is a bit overtired.

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There is really no reoutine.


Tracy does not recommend a strict schedule but she does suggest that your routine be based losely around Eat Activity Sleep You time (EASY).  Many LO's of your son's age are cycling through that in around 2.5 - 3 hours (during the day).

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Did i mention that he had open heart surgery 4 weeks ago and is recovering from a resp infection as well

Poor little guy.  I would imagine all this recovery probably means that he really does need his sleep.  Hopefully getting some order to his days might help you both out.

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a typical night goes like this... we have quiet time... usally a feeding then a bath then holding time... pat and ssssh (Only if he is crying) then to bedroom. It is dimly lit at all times. We listen to lullibyes (music on sometimes all night) one more feed until he sleeps then to basket. This sleep lasts for 3-5 hrs then up every 2 hrs to feed.

All of this sounds really good, like you are getting into some good habits early.  I would suggest that you try not to feed him all the way to sleep as that will create a sleep association of needing to be fed to sleep.  Try and put your LO into his bed drowsy but still a little awake.  I know that can be quite hard for a LO your son's age but that should be your goal.  That first night sleep stretch of 3 - 5 hours is good - that means that DS is learning to distinguish night from day.  It does take a while.  It is also quite normal for DS to wake during the night to feed at his age.

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He hates the paci though we are trying it more now.

My DS was very similar - he never LOVED the paci - took it sometimes but not always.  It made it easy to wean though at about 4 months so hopefully it will be for you too.

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Again, how do you force a 10 week old to sleep?

Well, you can't force him  :) I remember my DH asking me the same question  :)   What you can do is try and help him learn how to sleep and help him to create good positive sleep associations.  It doesn't happen overnight, it will take time.  But you are doing a great job so far.  It is hard when you are feeling so sleep deprived and especially when you have had such a rough 10 weeks but you and your DS will both get there.

Good luck and HTH
Jo[/quote]

Offline prncss

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« Reply #4 on: January 06, 2006, 16:15:22 pm »
thank you so much this is a great help to me. Where are the sample routines again? I really apreciate your help! thank you!


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FrasersMum

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wont sleep in bed
« Reply #5 on: January 06, 2006, 23:02:02 pm »
Hi pncss

Glad this helped.

You'll find the EASY board in the Activity section of the website - you'll find links to sample routines according to age at the top of the board.

Cheers
Jo