Do you think seperation anxiety causes this?

[Lica]

Hello everyone. I am new here and need your help

My son just turned 2 a couple of weeks ago. I am a full-time mom, and  7 month pregnant with the second baby.
The whole situation becomes more and more unbearable since I don't have enough sleep.

My son asks me to hold his hand while sleeping in his crib(this situation has lasted for 2-3 months after kicking off his pacifier), and usually it takes him 30-60 minutes to actually fall asleep.Ar... killing me

The worst part is that he still wakes up 4-5 times during the night, and need my help to fall asleep.He would cry for me to hold his hand during the night wakings. If I resist, he will cry his head off and scream. Sometimes, I end up shouting at him and then he can go back to sleep on his own. 
(his crib is in our room)

I have tried to put him to bed earlier, but no luck...he would stay awake until 830-900(his usual bedtime)and still have a lot of night wakings.

Any advice or is it just a phase of a 2-yea- old?
 

[elfin]

What does his day look like?  What does his nap and bedtime routine look like?  Have these problems just started?  Is moving his crib out of your room an option?

Post back and we will try to help!

[Lica]

thanks  for the reply,

here is his day routine

7-8am wake up

830-9am breakfast

12-lunch

130pm- nap (1hr-1.5 hrs till 3-330pm)

6pm- dinner

715pm-bath

815pm bed time(usually takes 30-45 minutes to fall asleep with me holding his hand)

between 3-6pm, he'll have some fruit and some physical or art activities with us

Nap and bedtime routine are the same.  he brings one of his favorite toys, and give me 1-2 books to read to him. I turn off the light, turn on the soft music. He knows it's bedtime, but he will ask me to hold his hands during nap time and bedtime. If I don't, he cries hysterically, and is difficult to settle down.

Last night, he woke up crying at 3am, 4am, 5am, 6am, and scream at 7am for I kept telling him "go to bed, no holding hands".
In the end I had to ask him if he wanted to sleep or went to the time-out spot to make him stop crying and screaming in the hope that he didn't wake up a living-in not so healthy grandma

I thought about moving him to another room, but my DH said it would probably make the situation worse because my son is a touchy kid.

help~

[jessica and emilys mummy]

Hi
Are you going to put him into his own room when your baby arrives?
If you are,then I would do it now so that he can get used to it
without feeling pushed out (that's not how it would be obviously,but
you know what kids are like )

Then I would start by going in and out.
Lay him down for bed,kiss him and go out of the romm.Count to 10,go in,lay him down,
go out and count to 10,repeat this until he's asleep.
The first night is a nightmare,but I assure you it will get better by night 3.But persevere.

You can still do this in your room,which is fine when you put him to,but maybe dh could
do it during the night,it would mean getting in and out of the bed.

I know you said you've tried putting him to bed earlier,but I would try again,but
only by about 10 minutes and keep it at that for a good week or so,then another
10 mins.
It sounds as though ds is overtired and has a bit of sep anx.
I have been through all of this,so I know how you feel.
But it will work,it just doesn't feel like it at the time

[Lica]

Jessica and Emily's mummy

Thanks for the reply.
My DH and I decide to put our 2nd one in another room so my DS and lo won't affect each other's sleep.

So far I am making some progress, not much but some.
DS can literally fall asleep without much help now.
First night it was really a nightmare to put him to sleep as he insisted holding my hand while I insisted patting on his back without other physical contact. I told him I'd pat on his back for 5 minutes, and I'd put my hand on his back for 5 minutes. He cried hysterically while I removed my hand from him. But I kept doing putting him down, and reassuring him I would be there watching him fall asleep.

Amazingly, he did fall asleep on his own eventually within 30 minutes and slept through the night for 9-10 hours.
We kept doing this and he did well for the first few nights,but he became an early riser, sleeping for 10 hours at night in average .( I guess I have to solve this after solving night waking problem )

For these 2 nights, I was waken up by his loud dreamtalking but he settled down with a little help quickly.
I think I'll hang in there until he, my DH and I can truly have a good night sleep.