45 min. naps, plus a toddler - a success story (so far)

[LisbonMom]

Just wanted to share a recent success I've had handling my 12-week old lo's 45 min. naps.
DD started having short naps, I think, because I had to wake her from her naps so often, trips to the doctor, shots, picking up big sister, etc. Basically, she unlearned how to transition between sleep cycles, which she used to do just fine. Or maybe it was just a coincidence and naps shortened on their own... Anyway, along with short naps came frequent night wakings.
With a toddler around sleep training got increasingly difficult. Shh/pat stopped dd from crying, but she was still awake after 30 minutes patting, and with sister interrupting me all the time, I would just give up and get dd up.
So today I tried something different. I went in BEFORE the 45 minute mark, and caught as it happened. With pressure on her arm, to stop the startling awake, she transitioned to another sleep cycle with minimal crying. This was for the morning nap, when sister is in school. So how could I repeat my success with her hanging around ? I told her BEFOREHAND what I was going to do (help lo sleep) and ASKED her if she could play quietly on her own (she does play on her own, but keeps coming to me to get her something, show me something, etc): I told her if she ABSOLUTELY needed me, to come in the room very quietly so as not to wake lo. So in I go before the 45 min. mark, hearing toddler play, caught the awakening jolt with pressure, and suddenly sister comes in the room! But she does it so softly, with her finger stretched towards me to kiss her boo-boo, which I do, and kiss her too, and off she goes. After a little bit she came in again with her chair and doll to sit next to me, but by then lo was sleeping soundly and I was able to get out. I thanked and praised toddler for helping me and playing so well on her own, and we played together until lo's next feed time.

Aahhhhhh, and how confident I feel towards the next naps, days, weeks !!!

Sara

P.S. Now, to handle the night waking too .....

[Caroline-Charlies Mummy]

Well done you, and well done Luisa too. What a thoughtful little girl

Thanks for sharing. It's great to hear the success stories, it really helps to know there is light at the end of the tunnel.

[vjg]

That is very inspiring and I appreciate the information. 

My new born son takes four 45min naps a day and I cannot get him to extend.  My daughter is 19 months and goes wild every time I try to soothe my son to sleep during the day.  She has a hard time not being engaged with someone at this point in her development.  And, its only me at home, so my poor son is getting shafted in the sleep department. 

I nurse my son and find that he takes a full meal every 3 hours.  So, I think it's his lack of good napping that is affecting his nighttime sleep.  I'm very consistent with our nighttime routine -- feed, bath, quiet time, sleep by six.  We do a dream feed at 10/10:30pm.  But then he's up at 2:30/3:00am; not incredibly hungry [when I thought he was in a growth spurt, I would feed him, but he'd only snack].  I soothe with a paci and he seems to fall asleep until 4:30/5:30am.  He takes a full meal, then sleeps for 90 minutes.  We do a morning feed at 7am. 

At this point I am just looking for some insight on how to attack this problem on any front.  I am not fortunate enough to have my 19 month old engaged at school during the day.  Nor do I have the resources to send her off, while I am home with my son.  It's the three of us or bust and I feel as if I'm at the busting point. 

[LisbonMom]

Vjg,

I know how tiring it can be. Does your toddler have a favorite video she can watch (like Baby Einstein or some such) ? I've found that tackling the 45 min. nap problem this way uses less of your time than waiting for him to wake up and then soothing him (which can take forever). Maybe you could try popping in a video and go to your son, and when he's asleep again, go back to your toddler. And PRAISE a lot for being able to sit quietly while you were busy with your lo.
To encourage you further, on the second day, for her morning nap, I went in the room before the 45 min. mark, she stirred but I didn't have to do anything and she fell right back to sleep. What a success! Other naps had to intervene as the day before, but it does encourage you to keep at it. Best of luck to you,

Sara