I posted in an answer to another of your posts that I thought your daughter might have a sleep association problem with her cot. Since I had to do sleep training on myself for insomnia, I learnt you sleep better if you keep your bed for sleep, and not for reading, watching TV, working etc. So I decided to do the same with my son. I only have couple of soft toys in his cot for him to cuddle - no exciting games or anything. I almost never put him in the cot for a play period (only do it if he asks to), I'll let him play on the floor of his room instead. If I hear him playing in his cot soon after I put him down for his nap, I go in and tell him it's time for sleep and leave. If he still doesn't fall asleep within 30 minutes for his afternoon nap, I get him out and try again in half an hour. THe downside to this is that he wants to get out of his cot as soon as he wakes in the morning, but I think it's worth it for the fact that he knows his cot is for sleeping. Iknow others will disagree, but it works for me!
At night if he wakes up and wants to play, I tell him it's time for sleep and lie down next to the cot and pretend to sleep myself. I wait till he's fallen asleep and then I leave.
I try to keep nap and bedtimes around the same time, give or take 30 minutes or so. Though sometimes I have to go with the flow if he woke early or slept in. Toby sleeps for around 10-11 hours at night, and about 2 hours during the day (a bit more or less some days) though his nap seems to be getting shorter since he turned 2. So that's around 12 hours a day. He sleeps well now unless he's sick.