Author Topic: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week  (Read 3256 times)

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Offline sacmommy

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2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« on: February 08, 2006, 22:20:54 pm »
I'm writing out of a little bit of frustration over my daughter's sporadic napping. I feel like I've tried so hard to establish great sleep habits since she was born, and it frustrates me to no end that she skips 1 to 2 naps per week. She just hangs out in her crib and talks for up to 2 hours, but doesn't sleep. I've had some success with extending my pre-nap wind-down routine, but still she skipped 2 naps last week, and I think she's aobut to skip her second nap in a row today.

I know others have this problem, I'm just looking for support (again!) I think I should just leave her, not intervene, and hope for the best. But I'm more stressed with my 4-yo when she doesn't nap and can't spend as much time doing fun projects with him because I stress about noise, etc. Plus it makes afternoon activities really hard because she then has to go to bed at 6:30! I'm just writing out of irritation.
Rose
Karina - Jan 24, 2004
Calvin - Sept 23, 2001

Offline Carmela's Mom

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #1 on: February 09, 2006, 01:29:08 am »
We always seem to be at the same point!  Carmela was doing much better with her naps and then last Wednesday and this Wednesday she wouldn't sleep!  Both times, I went in after 1.5 hours and just stood there.  She wouldn't play with me in the room and she finally got bored and fell asleep within 20 minutes.  I'm not sure if that's the right thing to do or not.  Last Wed she only slept for 45 mins and this Wed for 1.5 hours.... but then tonight when we went to put her into bed..we did so 15 minutes later, and it took her 45 minutes to fall asleep, which is a little out of character for her..normally it's within 30 minutes...so I'm wondering if I should let her be and just not make her sleep when she doesn't fall asleep on her own.



Offline tylersmommy

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #2 on: February 09, 2006, 03:00:55 am »
Right there with you! Tyler's always been a great sleeper, but he started skipping naps on occasion around 21 mo. He does the same thing as your DD, just hangs out in his crib chatting for 1-2 hrs. It's sometimes related to illness, but not always. He'll skip his nap half the time for a couple of weeks for no apparent reason, then will go back to taking long naps consistently for a couple of weeks. I've heard of some other moms having the same issue, so I think it's normal and I've tried to go with the flow as best I can. I know it must be frustrating, since that's your alone time with your 4-yo, and I wish I had some advice for you. Sometimes if I go in and remind Tyler that it's time for night night, he'll go to sleep, but not always. Annoying, isn't it? ::)
Melissa
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Offline Carmela's Mom

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #3 on: February 09, 2006, 11:49:26 am »
I don't think I am going to help her nap anymore.  Yesterday she woke up at 3:30 which made for a little over an hour nap...great.  Well then I put her to bed at 7 and she didn't fall asleep until 8:00 and then she was up before 6 a.m. this morning...waaaay to early for me so I'm thinking it's her bodys way of regulating the sleep she gets???



Offline sacmommy

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #4 on: February 09, 2006, 18:03:40 pm »
Thank you both so much! As you know, sometimes you just need a little support and reassurance that you're doing the best you can given the situation! It's funny, both of your kids have seemed very similar to Karina for a long time! I remember Tyler and Karina went through similar stages before their first birthdays as well.

It's good to know Tyler skips regularly and then goes back to full time naps. When Karina skips 2 in a row I get nervous that she'll get out of the habit. But her no nap days are very calm recently - I can hardly tell she's awake she's so quiet, so at least she's definitely getting a rest. She's been sleeping fine at night when she doesn't nap, so who cares?!

Jackie, I think you're right on limiting intervention. Sometimes it's helpful - but if you're standing there the whole time, it starts to sound like too much!
Rose
Karina - Jan 24, 2004
Calvin - Sept 23, 2001

Offline sacmommy

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #5 on: February 09, 2006, 22:32:17 pm »
Well, she's missing her nap for the 3rd day in a row. I'm so frustrated.
Rose
Karina - Jan 24, 2004
Calvin - Sept 23, 2001

Offline Carmela's Mom

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #6 on: February 10, 2006, 00:17:11 am »
It IS frustrating.  I always get extremely frustrated as well.  How is she when she doesn't nap?  Is she a bear or manageable or the same as with a nap?  How is her night sleep?  I've heard they will extend their night sleep a bit when they are transitioning to no nap.  I'd still be consistent and put her to bed 12:45 or 1:00 and give her 2 hours alone...let her play, wind down, etc. and that's all you can do.  Eventually she'll either appreciate the quiet OR start napping.  I know it's frustrating.  I pull my hair out too.



Offline sacmommy

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #7 on: February 11, 2006, 04:48:23 am »
I KNOW she needs the nap, but she just seems to need a stronger wind-down than some kids. My dh gets her down no problem, I'm just too high strung! She's actually mostly fine when she doesn't nap, just a little fragile (crying over silly things). But she sleeps fine at night... 12-13 hrs when she doesn't nap, so that part is fine. She was a wreck today. My dh came home at lunch and put her down for me :) We'll see what happens next week!
Rose
Karina - Jan 24, 2004
Calvin - Sept 23, 2001

Offline Carmela's Mom

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #8 on: February 11, 2006, 19:06:00 pm »
I am so frustrated today and thought I'd post under your post since I know you understand :) 

I am trying everything to get her down for a nap earlier...since she started this napping thing again (taking 1.5 hours to fall asleep) she's been waking earlier in the morning :(  So I've been putting her down at 12:30 but tonight we're having compnay and so I really wanted her to nap to see if I could keep her up later.....well I put her in at 1:04 and it's now 2:04 and no sleep in sight.  I'm hoping by 2:30 she's out....but that is getting way too late.  At least I was wondering what would happen if I put her in later, if it would solve the issue and now I don't have to wonder...I can continue with 12:30 (and maybe even 12:15) and that way she's sleeping by 2-2:15.....I wake her at 3:30 to protect bedtime but now with her waking earlier, I'm not even sure I should do that anymore.

What a mess!  I hear so many babies just going to sleep when they are in their crib -- guess that would be way too easy!



Offline Carmela's Mom

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #9 on: February 13, 2006, 17:56:07 pm »
Hey,

Just a question.  Does karina seem tired when you put her in her crib for nap time????  Carmela rubs her eyes so I think she is but then immediately the door shuts to her room and she's up playing.  I just don't get it.  I'm wondering if I should just put her in real late (like 2 p.m. late) and deal with the short nap then from being overtired!



Offline sacmommy

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #10 on: February 14, 2006, 04:51:45 am »
Karina is definitely tired when I put her down pretty much every day. I don't think with our girls it's a matter of being tired or not ~ I think they just need a more substantial wind down period. Karina didn't nap for 3 days, so of course she was tired enough! She just really likes to play if I don't give her enough time to wind down.
Rose
Karina - Jan 24, 2004
Calvin - Sept 23, 2001

Offline Carmela's Mom

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #11 on: February 14, 2006, 12:04:04 pm »
See the wind down thing isn't working for us ... I've tried so hard the past 5 days to get her to sleep with a LONG wind down and its resulting in the same thing.  I'm really considering just moving her nap to 1:30-2 and seeing how it works out from there.



Offline Carmela's Mom

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #12 on: February 14, 2006, 18:44:04 pm »
Have you tried pushing her nap back again?  I know you did to 12:45 but since then have you pushed it back again?



Offline sacmommy

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #13 on: February 14, 2006, 21:21:32 pm »
Sorry, I was gone over the weekend and didn't have much time last night to respond. I don't think moving her back that much later is going to help. Like the other day when you tried 1 pm, and Carmela still took a long time to go to sleep (if at all!) I think being consistent with a longer wind down and a fairly consistent time is the best we can do. Today I held Karina for longer than usual in her dark room (I'd say 5-6 minutes) and she still seemed wide awake so I finally put her down. Then she went to sleep fairly quickly and calmly. Sometimes I don't have the patience or whatever to do that, or I just think it's silly - but it seems to help her get calm. For my husband, she goes down very easily - he's just so much calmer than I am!!

If you think a later time will help Carmela, try it. Do a 3-day trial and see what happens. I assume you will get the same behavior you get at 12:45, but it's definitely worth a try!
Rose
Karina - Jan 24, 2004
Calvin - Sept 23, 2001

Offline Stacie:Emma&Josh Mom

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #14 on: February 14, 2006, 23:11:29 pm »
I just saw this post and just wanted to jump in and reassure you that dd is doing the same thing here.  Hit or miss on the nap and VERY fragile without it...melting much earlier in the evening so she definitely needs one.  And she takes atleast 2 hours when she does take one so it's definitely needed.  I personally don't know that it's about wind down so much as they're just taking control a bit more, a bit more independence.  I often think that she's staying up just cause she can, YKWIM.  She's figured out that I can make her stay in her room, but I can't make her sleep.  We do leave her in there for as long as we can for a rest period.  A couple of times, we've been able to go in and tell her to get back in her bed (if needed) and that it's time to sleep and she will, but not always.  I really think it's just a sign of asserting their independence and I figure atleast she's getting some alone time.  It is VERY frustrating for me with a new baby, especially if I happen to get the baby down at the same time and then dd doesn't sleep so I can't really sleep, though I doze as much as I can through her chatter down the hallway.  So, no magic answers for you, but definitely sympathy.  And the time doesn't really matter here either...I've tried early and late and being consistent with one or the other.  We actually let her sleep pretty late and she still goes down for the night miraculously enough.  Hang in there!

Offline Carmela's Mom

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #15 on: February 15, 2006, 17:52:16 pm »
I've done the longer wind down now for awhile and it's done nothing....she's getting worst instead of better.  So what I'm going to do is go for the later nap time.  I may hate myself for it, but I don't know what else to do.  Plus the longer wind down once I have the new baby I'm sure isn't going to work at all.  At night, she's fine with our wind down and that's the same one as nap so I'm thinking I have to do something else....

Stacie I do think your right that it's all about the power!  I wonder how long it goes on before they give in and just nap?  It seems we've been going through this for MONTHS now!!!!!!!!  I need a nap today sooooo bad.



Offline sacmommy

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #16 on: February 15, 2006, 21:36:25 pm »
Well, it must be Wednesday. I think Karina skips her nap every Wednesday, because it is also our late day with swimming and gymnastics, so I can't put her to bed early!! And of course she seemed so tired all morning.

You are both probably right ~ I know Karina is asserting herself very much these days in terms of figuring out how much control she has over every situation. She's definitely started the power struggles.
Rose
Karina - Jan 24, 2004
Calvin - Sept 23, 2001

Offline Carmela's Mom

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #17 on: February 20, 2006, 18:06:34 pm »
How has Karina been napping?

We went on to a 1:30 nap which caused her to wake earlier (but I think it may have been becuase I was putting her to bed later as a result of her waking from her nap later)....

I am so annoyed with this.  Nap time is going to be 1:00-3:00 in this house from now on.  It's her choice to sleep or not.  Bedtime is 7-7:15 and that is it.  I find when she does this, I change things around and then things get worst.  So this is my new way.....strict strict strict!



Offline asher and noël's mama

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #18 on: February 20, 2006, 19:40:46 pm »
hi ladies, i hope you don't mind me joining in.  i have a 23 month old ds and a 11 week old dd.  i can totally relate with what you guys are going through.  asher, by ds is on and off with his naps these days and it is driving me crazy.  i definitely need the down time with a new little one in the house. 

rose... i remember reading something in tracy's book about over stimulated toddlers don't sleep or nap as well.  i wonder if the morning swimming and gymnastics is over stimulating her, and then she has a hard time winding down, even if she if very tired.  i have experienced this with ahser lately.  on sunday mornings we go to church and he is in a child care class that he absolutely loves, but it tires him out completely.  by the time we get home, even though he has been falling asleep on the way home and we try to keep him awake until we get home, and even though it is his normal nap time, he rarely naps on sundays.  he just talks and plays, and then starts to cry about an hour later.  so, maybe he is over tired and over stimulated and his body mind won't let him sleep though that is exactly what his body needs.  does this make sense?

today, monday, he didn't nap again, and i went in and told him gave him a hug and told him to sleep.  he was very mad that i didn't let him out, so he cried, i let it go for about 4 minutes, and now he is fast asleep.  i really don't like to let him cry, but we didn't do e.a.s.y. with him, so sometimes it is the only way to get him asleep.  we are doing e.a.s.y. with our dd, and i am so thankful for it.

any advice out there for moms of toddlers who didn't do e.a.s.y. and now are wishing they did?  do i continue to let him cry, usually it only takes a few minutes and he is asleep?  what are my alternatives.  pu pd is out of the question, he weight's 33 lbs.
~kellie

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Offline Carmela's Mom

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #19 on: February 20, 2006, 19:47:03 pm »
In Traci's toddler book she talks about S.L.O.W. ... which I interpreted it not as CIO but as to just be slow into going to them when they cry.  To listen to them first.  I know some kids need to cry for a few minutes before settling down so if your DS is only crying for 5-10 minutes, I'd let him cry and settle himself before running in. 

Carmela didn't nap today.  It is so so so so annoying.



Offline asher and noël's mama

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #20 on: February 20, 2006, 19:47:58 pm »
oh, and i was going to comment on the longer wind down.  you do really want to keep it short if you have a new baby coming.  ours in about 5 minutes with ds, and sometimes that is too long, when dd really needs me.

i don't think making in longer really does much.  i have tried that.  i think the best thing you can do for them is to keep in consistent, then they know what to expect.

~kellie
~kellie

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Offline asher and noël's mama

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #21 on: February 20, 2006, 19:51:55 pm »
is it a seperate book just for toddler's?  good to know.  i have wondered if i should try to "build back trust" as she talks about when you have lo's cry it out.  but now that asher is almost two, and he for the most part sleeps well, just an occasional cry for a few minutes, i am not sure i want to change things on him.

what do you think?
~kellie

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elizabeth noël 12/2/05
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Offline Carmela's Mom

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #22 on: February 20, 2006, 19:55:31 pm »
I so agree about the new baby coming and the wind down routines.  It's been taking 45 minutes to sleep at night -- if not longer -- and I am going to start experimenting to see if we stop our wind down routine completely, if it doesn't prolong that anymore.  If it does, we will continue, but if not, then into bed she goes.....same with naps.  I am sick of trying to wind down for 30+ minutes a day and night and having no results!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes Traci has a book just for toddlers....definitely buy it.  I wouldn't change much unless it was broken.  But if he's only crying for 10 minutes, I wouldn't say that is broken.  I know others disagree but that's just how I feel...now if you told me he was crying for an hour or more, I'd feel differently.



Offline asher and noël's mama

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #23 on: February 20, 2006, 20:46:06 pm »
what does you 45 minute wind down look like at night?
~kellie

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Offline Stacie:Emma&Josh Mom

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Re: 2-yo Skipping 1-2 Naps Each Week
« Reply #24 on: February 21, 2006, 00:20:43 am »
I also wouldn't say that short of a cry is "broken" especially if it's working...