thanks tons for all that information. I'm going to have to watch his schedule more closely over the next few days. he definately is a snacker though. I got into this really badly because of nursing to sleep.

before our trip (so between 2 and 3 months) he was eating every 3 hours or so.
now it's kind of hard to tell if he's tired or hungry sometimes, as he roots when he's tired too, but he does seem to be really ready to eat after two and a half hours. (I know i have enough milk. he doesn't even drain one side.)
I think perhaps part of this problem is that "foggy" time of morning where i'm denying that he's awake so early, so i keep nursing him, and I don't even know what time he really fed. So as soon as he wakes up, I guess I have to get up and be alert.
I don't think it's worth making him wake up later. ds1 gets up before 7 anyway, and crying with pupd would definately wake him up. I heard Spiriteds have early wake up times anyway. but i do have to get up right away in that case, to be on top of EASY.
Could I use those routines as guidelines, but bump them up and hour earlier? thanks for posting them.
I'm also confused about his A times. Sometimes he gets tired so quickly, but often if i don't get him to bed then, he'll "get over it" and be able to keep himself up pretty happily (though often needing more attention) for hours. This has happened if ds1 is having a bad day and won't give me enough time to get the lo to sleep.
here's today's schedule so far as an example of what i mean:
~5: E. I fell asleep with him in my bed.
6:30 woke up. Nursed him, but don't know if this was a "meal" or pacifying.
8:00 E
8:15 - 9:45 S
By 10:30 he was "kvetching" which has always meant he's tired, but when it comes that early it confuses me.
10:45 E
11-12 pu/pd with a break
12 S
I'll keep a log of the next few days.
I'd love to move him out of my room, and will do so as soon as he can fall asleep a little less dramatically.
Another factor at play, which I have mentioned, is that in the afternoon I can't always get him down, or do pupd if he wakes up too early, if it takes too long. It depends on big brother's mood!
ds will be home most of tomorrow and Sat. so ds's routine can be a little more ideal . (he can also help with pu pd!

thanks again for this help!