Help- several issues needing resolving

[AmyT]

Hello.

My 12 week old weighs 12lb 7oz. She is a very healthy and happy babybut I have a few issues that I am having trouble resolving and I am exhausted thinking about it all so any suggestions will be helped.

At present she drinks 4oz every 3.5 hours, with bed time at 8pm and a dream feed at 11pm.

She wakes at any time between 4 - 5.30am. Usually I hear her stirring and before she is fully awake I dream feed her and she goes right back to sleep until 7am.She will drink the full 4oz at this feed.

However she then wont take a bottle until about 10am. I decided perhaps I should wean her off this night feed in order to egt her to feed earlier in the morning as I would like to put her on a four hour schedule to see if she will increase her intake. ( however when she has gone 4+ hours between feeds she still only takes the 4oz).

Last night she very unusually took 6oz at 8pm and a further 5oz at 11pm/ She then slept til 5.30am. I offered her a diluted bottle of formula( with the hope of gradually just offering water in a few days until she stops waking) but she was so full she refused in completely and still would not take her breakfast til 9.30am. She is just not interested in her breakfast. As I could not feed her back to sleep I then had to get up with her. She does not cry so I find shh/pat pointless as she does not need calming really. But If I ignore her and leave her lie in her cot she will not drop back off and fusses and kicks about keeping me awake either way.

She gets into a very light sleep at 4am and makes a lot of noise in her sleep so I have not really slept much more than 11pm-4am for the past few weeks and am desperate.

As she is a very very good sleeper until 4am ( goes down ater 8pm feed and puts herself to sleep with no assistance) I am convinced here wakings are food related however I cannot get her to take more than 4-5 oz in each feed and this does not sustain her through the night. How can I wean her off the 4am feed and get her to sleep until say 7am? And if she is full from the night before and still wakes but refuses a bottle as she is not hungry what can I do to break the habit and how do I know if it habit or hunger? How do I get her back to sleep if she is not crying but is awake and refusing to settle herself back to sleep.

I visited a friend yesterday who's baby is 6 days older than mine and 1.5lbs lighter. Her Lo is taking 7oz per feed and sleeping 9 to 8 with no dream feed!!! I nearly cried with jealousy.

[Noelle]

Hello! 

I agree with Stacy that it could be more out of habit now than hunger, especially since she's not hungry right away in the AM.  She probably takes a "full" feeding too because she's still asleep and more relaxed.  It is very common for babies to wake between 4-6AM to play.  If left alone, they will most times go back to sleep on their own.  Both of my kids did this and they would play for up to an hour.  Granted I wasn't sleeping during this time either - I kept waiting for them to cry     I would suspect though if you weren't to feed her, she would probably cry because she is expecting to feed.  If this is the case, you could try pu/pd or pat/ssh until closer to 6:00am which would be a reasonable (to a baby  ) wake-up time.  HTH 

[AmyT]

Thanks both for your replies. I suspect you are right- she used to take her feed at night and by 7am be starving again. But for last week or two she just not interested in her breakfast which is why I suspect she needs to drop this bottle. It true what you said bout her taking the full feed if she sleeping- she more relaxed as if she awake I think it registers that she full and she doesnt take even an ounce of it.

I always put her down to sleep awake and she drops of relatively easily, but I do feed her last thing before she goes down so perhaps I have enforced the habit that she needs a bottle before sleep- I didnt think this was a problem as some days she wide eyed after her bottle and playing but I stick to her bed time, put her down and it takes up half hour of gurgling and cooing before she puts herself to sleep.

I will try graually extending a bedtime routine AFTER last bottle- perhaps just start with changing her pyjamas and nappy after last bottle rather than before.

She doesnt really nap well in day as I have found that when I take her upstairs to her cot she wakes herself up completely and fights sleep until it next feed time. She has been napping in her little bouncing chair and just nods of when she tired. But her naps then only last 45 mins as she wakes up after first sleep cycle.

Her naps are definitely another issue I want to resolve as I want her to have a longer morning and afternoon nap.

Unfortunately as I have only discovered the BW in last week I have yet to get her on EASY as I have had difficulty with night/mornign feed times.

I will try this week holding back on the 4-6am feed and see if I can get her back to sleep until about 6.30-7am. This will allow me to plan her day feeds and her naps.

I'll let you know how it goes.

[AmyT]

I just wanted to update you on the night waking situation.

Last night she woke as per usual at 4.30am but I didnt even sit up to look at her I just lay and listened. Within bout 20 minutes she was back asleep- no tears no whining. She then slept until 6.15am and played in her cot until 7am, which is great as she was put to bed at 7.30pm last night. She still wasn't hugely bothered about her breakfast and it took a lot of coaxing to get her drink 4oz, but she did eventually drink it and we on track now to go for a 4 hour EASY today.

She also without any real effort from me after an hour of A time napped for two hours which she has never done before- it's almost as if she knew I was ready to put her on EASY from today and just decided to co-operate.

I might reduce the amount in her last bottle before bed so she take more at dreamfeed and perhaps be more keen on her breakfast ( though to be honest Im starting to suspect it boredom that putting her off her food not lack of appetite as every bottle a bit of a battle now, she just always seems to have better things to be doing than sitting quiet eating).

Thanks again for your help-must say im starting to get hooked on this site as it so useful. I am 110% what Tracy would have refferred to as a 'By the Book' parent- I have an overwhelming need to research and look up issues I have and try and find solutions and this site provides them all.

[Noelle]

Hey!!! That's great!! yay!! 

If it were me, I probably wouldn't decrease the last bottle to get her to take more at the dreafeed as you want more calories during the day vs the night.  Plus you will eventually want to wean the dreamfeed 

[AmyT]

yes I guess so- its just frustrating that she wont take her breakfast, and this throws her off for rest of day then. She's gaining weight fine but is such a small eater. Been on 4oz a feed since 2 months old and still wont take anymore, even when stretched to 4 hours or mor, wont take any more than 4oz.

Her dreamfeed was 11.30 last night mind so perhaps that had a knock on effect. Perhaps if I see that her dreamfeed is 10pm she might have more of an appetite for her breakfast.