Need an E.A.S.Y. mentor

[mrsmynub]

I have been posting here for a week with problems I have been having implementing EASY with my (almost) 8 week old son.  THe past two days he has been taking (2) 2 1/2 hour naps as well as a 45 minute nap in the late afternoon before retiring for bed at between 7 and 9.  The only thing is that I can only get him to take naps by swaddling him and holding him unti he is almost totally asleep.  Otherwise, he screams.  Cries and screams.  THe pat/shush does nothing for him.  I am wondering if there is a seasoned pro out there that is willing to help me.  I thought that I would keep track of his days starting tomorrow for four days (like the book says) and post them altogether on Saturday, and then was hoping that a mentor of sorts would look at Dante's schedule and tell me what I should be doing differently.

I really don't want to be an "accidental parent" but feel like I have been at this WAY too long.  Now I understand how easy it is to simply "give in" with children!!!  I would do anything to get Dante to sleep.  (The other day I told him I would buy him a car if he would stop crying  !!!!!)

Thanks to anyone willing to take on the challenge!

[*Natasha*]

Hi There,

It is great you are starting to break this habit early as the earlier you start the easier it is. I use a combination of shh/patt and what is called walk in walk out. What you do is put baby down as usual and walk away and of course he will start to cry. Wait 2 mins before going in and calming him down now i use shh/patt until they stop crying. Then i walk away again. If they start crying again wait 4 mins before going in to calm baby down. Then walk away and continue doing this waiting an extra 2 mins everytime to go in but do not go past 10mins as i don't think they should be left longer than this as it will make them to hysterical. I believe (i never have gotten to this stage though) if in an hour he hasn't gone to sleep pick him up for a few minutes to calm (just some reassurance) then put them straight back down and continue the settling. It will be hard at the beginning but each time and each day it gets easier and quicker for them to fall asleep. I found it works quickly with my DD but expect it to take up to a week.
I hope this is helpful to you, feel free to ask anymore questions you might have and good luck.
***Big Hugs to You****

[nathansmum]

Hi!

Do you put him to sleep in your arms  or does he finish falling asleep on his own in his bed? That is the big difference! It's part of the 4 S' Tracy talks about in her second book. I still swaddle Nathan and hold him until he's calm and drowsy in my arms and then set him down. And he finishes falling asleep on his own.  Remember 8 weeks is still pretty young and you are TEACHING sleep. Give him time to learn. Just make sure he is not completely asleep in your arms.

Let us know how things go...
Hope this is helpfull. I know how hard it is to do this several times a day and always wonder what we are doing wrong. I still ask myself a million questions a day. But it does get easier as time goes on!

The car thing was too funny!!! 

[mrsmynub]

I have to say that he is much happier now that he is not crying all day.  He is still not on a regular schedule - some days he sleeps for an hour at a time, some days it;s 2 1/2 hours twice a day.  He is not totally asleep in my arms- his eyes are slits, but he definitely is not asleep.  I just worry - like all parents so, I guess.  Thanks for making me feel better about the whole thing.

Does it sound normal that he is not sleeping for the same amount of time each day?

My husband heard my car offer over the baby monitor and hasn't stopped laughing about it since

[HeatherC]

Hi.  I'm having a rough time with the website, as I'm sure others are experiencing, so bare with me.  I will certainly check into any post and try to offer help.  I'm no "seasoned pro," but with the wealth of knowledge on these boards I'm sure we can find answers for you.  First off, you are doing great.  If he will take that long of naps even some days, it's a great success.  Just like us, babies are going to have changes every day, especially at his age.  I find that it's haywire for lack of a better word at the moment up to 3-4 months when you might see longer stretches of similar patterns, a few changes, a steady stretch, and so on.  At his age, you are doing just what you should to help him learn to sleep.  As I know you've read the book, as parents we have to teach sleep and not expect them to just know what to do.  The BW community does not recommend leaving baby to cry for any length of time.  However, if you feel yourself getting frustrated, you should step away momentarily to regain your composure and try again.  It sounds like, though, that you are absolutely on the right track.  It can take quite a while for baby to catch on, but the more reassurance you give him, the better off he'll be feeling so comfortable that mom is right there for him.
When his nap lengths vary, just adjust your routine as best you can.  The most important thing about BWing is to read your baby's cues and thus respect his needs (meaning don't feed a crying baby if he's crying b/c he's tired).  By having a routine, you'll be able to anticipate his needs and you'll both feel more secure and comfortable.
Keep up the great work and I'll look for future posts.

[mrsmynub]

What a difference a few days make!!  Now that I know my ds's cues, life is much easier.  Even if he isn't a textbook BW baby and needs to be rocked to get into sleep mode, it is SO nice to know that he is on a routine and gettign sleep. 

Anyone out there have a baby that isn't on the routine at the same time each day?  My ds is off by about an hour or so it seems.

[Lªuren]

Hiya again
My DS stays awake between 2 - 3hrs now so his naps are not always at the same time everyday, and they are never the same length. I agree with nathansmum, as long as you are letting LO fall asleep on his own that is fine and is part of the 4 s's
Set the stage - prepare you LO room for sleep; remove stimulation, darken room, lullaby....
Swaddle - (I used to swaddle now I use a gro'bag with his arms swaddled)
Sitting - Quietly without any stimulation, and when necessary..
Shush-pat
...start the 4 S's 15 -20min before a nap?

You are doing a fantastic job on your new schedule 

[nathansmum]

Hang in there with all of us Dana. You are doing great!

[mrsmynub]

Thanks for all of your encouragement.  I am trying to hang in there.  You all know how the little ones change every day, so I feel like I am challenged every day.  Today, Dante took two, one hour naps, and has been fighting sleep ever since.  Also has eaten about 10 ounces in less than 5 hours.....maybe he is going through a growth spurt, but I am whipped today.