16 month old..wakes up crying and is up for 2 hours at a time

[vibha]

hello,
          iDG and i are beginning to feel like a complete wreck...i dread going to sleep at nights in anticipation of what else is to come...
my son has never slept through the night but there were days when he did sleep from 7:30 to 5:00 and had a talk to himself and slept till 6:30.
but now he wakes up screaming and up till 2 days ago at the same time...
just when i thought i would try the wake to sleep he wakes up at 12:05 then again at 1:50 and doesn't go to sleep till i give him his milk bottle at 3:40...in between he cries on and off and everytime i go in and put him down again and again leaving him to cry for  longer intervals...
we also gave him some calpol to rule out teething as his incisors are breaking through.
now its 9:30 in the morning and DS is already showing signs of sleepiness so put him to bed for nap to make up for lost sleep...don't know what else to do...
i have posted before ,DS has a good routine and is wonderful otherwise...he sleeps independently at nights and at naps,i just put him down and leave the room..
don't know how to bring him back on track...he naps around 1:00 to 2:30 in the afternoons,but in todays case will have 2 naps.
long mail....but any advice is welcome.
cheers,
vibha

[rach]

Hi Vibha

Sorry to hear about the problems you're experiencing with your little one.

Have you tried staying in the room with your son while he tries to settle himself back down?  Lay him back down in his cot/bed and stay in the room with him.  He may still cry, but as you're in the room with him he'll still feel secure.  Try to avoid conversation and eye contact, but if he needs some reassurance, when you lay him back down, simply tell him that its bedtime.  If he needs it, you could rest a hand on him to settle him.

By sitting on a chair in his room, you are able to gradually every 2 or 3 days move slightly closer towards the door until you are able to leave the room when he is awake and he's able to settle himself down.

HTHs, please keep us posted on your progress.

Rachel xx

[vibha]

hi Rachel
thank you for the reply and advice.,
had another bad night yesterday,although he went to bed ok at 8:00(  as he had a late afternoon nap) he woke up at 10:30 ,i went in to give him a cup of water,he had a drink and went to bed straight...but same story again at 11:45...i went to put him down again but said to him its night time go to sleep in a stern voice as i was soo tired...i guess it worked a little as next he woke up at 3:20 and again i just put him down and again at 4:30 when DH against my telling gave him a cup of milk...then he woke at 5:30 to start the day...some how i got him to stay in his cotbed till 6:30...
i am really at loss as to what is causing all this ,i am beginning to lose the plot with him.
maybe i will try to stay with him a bit longer like you said..
cheers,
vibha

[rach]

If need be, for a couple of nights, could you sleep in his room? Then start with trying the chair tactic?

(((((HUGS))))), I know how rotten it is at night, you feel like you're the only one going through the nightmare.

Take care, we're all here for you xx

[vibha]

hi,
    dint know things could get any worse but they did last night.
DS went to bed at 7:15
woke up at 10:30
again at 11:30
again at 2:15
agiain at 3:45 then
at 4:40...at which point i was on the verge of crying
i don't know what made me give him a bottle but he drank a bit
went to bed then
only to wake up again at 5:15 at which point DS wanted to start his day , i was having none of it so i went to his room and slept on the floor and he went to bed...to mu suprise i woke up at 7:45 when DS also woke up crying to fine me sleeping on the floor....he started to smile and laugh
now my problem is....will he expect me to be on the floor next to him always???
am i doing the right thing?
should i give him a bottle...did that make him sleep that bit longer?
please help me...
thank you
vibha

[Harrisonsmummy]

Hiya, You have my complete sympathy, I am going through something really similar with my 17mth old. It started following a cold, he is also getting eyeteeth. I have been giving meds before he goes to bed, (much to my dh disgust). I have concluded following reading every book I can find, that the lack of sleep gradually builds up over a period ( just the loss of an extra hour or so each day), until they are almost in a chronic state ( even though my ds is ok during day). We recently transitioned to one nap - and that seemed ok, but probably after cold produced some rough nights - he hasn't caught up.

Anyway the upshot of a this is, I am trying to get max sleep into lo, and some extra early bedtimes where I can. If he isn't overtired he goes down fine, and I do sit in room at night when he wakes as he settles much quicker, and I hope that the sooner he catches up the sooner he will sleep through.

Sorry for ramble - but may give some food for thought.
Justine