Why doesn't the dream feed work for us?

[Vanness]

Hi there,

My husband and I are desperately need some help here. Here is the situation with our little Matthew.....

- Matthew is 2 and 1/2 months old. He is currently on a 4 hours. Everything is normal during the day. He eats, stays up to play and sleep without a fuss. I usually swaddle him and give him a dummy and he falls asleep on his own. I know for a baby his age, he should be on a 3 hours routine. I have tried but he won't finish his full feed. He also putting on weight nicely on the 4 hours routine. So I don't want to go backwards. He has about 3 naps a day and all around 1 - 1 and 1/2 hours.

- Everynight he goes down around 7.30pm (last feed usually around 5.30pm). No problem with that, he usually sleeps right through to 1 or 2am. Then he will wake up for another feed. He will then wake up at 4am again. I have tried to cluster and dream feed him, but he is still waking up at 2 and again 4am. When he is awake, it usually pretty easy to get him to sleep again. I figured that his night time waking is habitual. So I have tried to set the alarm 1 hour before his usual wake time, but he still wakes up the same time. So we end up waking up 4 times in 5 hours!!!! I have tried everything Tracy Hogg has recommended in her book. But they do nothing but creating more problems.

We need some assistance here!! What should I do? Go back to no dream feed and let him wake up at the usual time?

[Mom to M&M]

I think it's OK for a baby Matthew's age to be on a 4-hour EASY, as long as he's eating and gaining and sleeping well. At that age, Marisa was between 3.5-4 hours.

The dream feed never worked for us either. It actually just disturbed Marisa's sleep and made her wake even more. We just dropped the dream feed and let DD wake when she would. Which in her case was only once a night to eat a full bottle.

If it were me, I'd drop the DF and feed Matthew at the first waking. If he takes a full feed at that time, you can TRY not to feed at subsequent night wakings and instead soothe him back to sleep with a quick cuddle and a little pat/shush. But if he's truly hungry, at his age, you should feed him.

Can you also add in a bit more calories during the day? Is he BF or bottle? If bottle, how many ounces?

[Colin Macs Mom]

I'm with Karen - I could never do a DF either, it just made ds angry for being woken, and distrubed him even more. We already have enough problems with night wakings!    I also suggest dropping the DF and feeding when he wakes for it.

[Vanness]

Thanks for your reply.
He is a breast feed baby. But because he has problem with attaching. I have been expressing and giving it to him in a bottle. He takes 200ml every time.

I have also tried the cluster feed. But because there is such a short gap between the 2 feeds, he won't take it. Or he will get confused the next day, wanting to have his feeds every 2-3 hours. So I end up having half bottles here and there.

[Mom to M&M]

The cluster feed never worked for us either. I'd suggest just trying to get as much in him as possible during normal feeds during the day, maybe feed the last bottle after 3 or 3.5 hours instead of 4 and feed at the first waking at 2am or so. Try to resettle without food after that if possible. Will he take more at the bedtime bottle - maybe even 240 ml?

Remember, sleeping through the night is also a developmental issue -not only food...