HELP!! scream machine!!!

[mindyjo_p]

oh my goodness, what a nightmare!  Our son (a previously good sleeper) has been off track since we left him with grandparents for a week while we went to Hawaii for a week on Valentine's Day.  The problem was compounded when he got sick right after we got back and we basically co-slept for the first time since he was born (he's nearly 17 mos. now) for about 3 weeks - I could just kick myself!  We put an end to the co-sleeping about 2 weeks ago and he's still waking in the night once and either goes back to sleep within a few minutes or screams and cries for half an hour to 2 hours.  Our attempts at laying him back down and walking out until he got the message that he was not coming to bed with us seemed to be working as the tantrums were getting shorter and shorter, then last night he was REALLY REALLY angry and would not stop screaming and throwing himself around for an hour!  It was awful but he did eventually settle down and go to sleep.  NOW, tonight, he had a complete fit at bedtime which has never ever been a problem, he's always loved to go to bed and I just don't know what to do.  I hope that we haven't made him scared of his bed by refusing to let him out of it in the middle of the night...I don't know what to do!  Tonight I actually let him out once because I started to wonder if he had an ear infection or something and as soon as his feet hit the floor he was talking about trucks and looking for our dog etc.  We're just so frustrated and I need someone with a clear head to tell me that it won't always be like this and that we're doing the right thing and remind us that taking him to bed won't help but will just prolong the problem...

sooooo frustrated and discouraged right now...oh..and tired too! 

[alyssa1]

Well I think you are totally right.  If you take him out of his room in the night or to bed with you it will make the problem worse.  We made that mistake too.  Our son is 14.5 months and has just recenltly woke up screaming in the night and sometimes will not go back down for close to 2 hours.  At first we would try taking him to bed with us to see if he would go back to sleep but that just made it worse - we stopped that right away.  We are making a transition with him from 2-1 naps but it sounds like your guy is making a transition back to his own bed/on his own/not at the grandparents.  He is probably going to take some time to figure out that he needs to stay in his bed and sleep there.  From this waking in the night he might be waking up in the morning a little overtired as well.  How is he napping?  I found that my guy was so overtired that it killed the nap and he was overtired at night too.  I took some advice from this website and put him to bed 30 min. early last night and he slept through - yeah!!  I'm going to try get him to bed a little early everynight so he sleeps better until this transition is over.  You may want to try the same??  I know what your lo is going through is completely different but I do think you are doing the right thing but not taking him in with you.  We would go in the same as you and tell him it's time to go back to sleep and lay him down (he was really upset when we would leave) but we did not want to give in.  That's the only suggestion I have, hopefully you will get some more advice.
Good luck!

[imsmum]

You might want to try sleeping for a couple of nights on a mattres in his room to slowly transition back to sleeping on his own. You might want to check out a post by Luna's mom on this board for that method.  It's also in Tracy's BW Solves All your Problems book.

[Florencia]

The mattress method is useful for lo's who're really upset for being left alone. My ds is one of them, i just couldn't walk out of the room cause he'd freak and would be harder to console and the wakings would last hours.

Some lo's are just like that, they need the company and slooowly go back on track, be sure of that. It is really hard work but if you remain consistant with the timings and methods, be sure you'll succeed. For me, things got worse before they got better but there's hope, you just need to rest. Would your partner or a friend/relative would be willing to jump in the training? dh and i switched nights and although it was still tiring and hopeless we'd be ready for our night shift cause we had rested the night before.

Good luck and don't give up, it is so worth it!