WEANING thread...Come and share your experiences and offer support.

[Anna & Baby Caleb's Mommy]

Between four and five months, we transitioned to feeding at 8:30a, 12:30p, 4:30p, 8:30p, and about 5:00a. 

is that 5 feeds total for 24 hour period?  took your advice and am offering larger bottle, 5 oz, he doesnt take it all except for twice, but we're working up to it. our routine is off right now, feeding too frequently, short naps, i wanted to mention one of my boobs doesn't yield a lot of milk so i'm having a hard time feeling confident about supply...hard to know if he's getting enough to tide over because of that and so i probably feed too frequently which leads to short naps and it's just a vicious cycle.  i am convinced that we will never be on easy until i stop bf   thank you for advice.   

[mrs_kat]

Please don't be insulted by this, but are you sure he's really hungry every time you feed him?  You may have discussed this in a previous post, so sorry if that's the case.  What happens if you don't feed him right away - does he just cry and cry? 

Also, I remember that we struggled with the 45-minute naps from three months to nearly six months, and that made it difficult to stay on EASY, especially before she was able to stay up for very long. At three months, I'd feed her, she'd be awake an hour, then sleep only 45 minutes, so it wouldn't be time for her to eat yet, but since she could only stay up an hour I'd end up having to feed her right before putting her back to sleep and the whole EASY thing turned into EASAESAE...you get my drift.  So anyway, with short naps tossed in, are you sure he's hungry and not just tired sometimes?  My lo was willing to eat any time I was willing to feed her (just like I'm always up for a snack even though I'm not always hungry), but that doens't necessarily mean she NEEDED to eat all the time...it could make the difference between her eating a little versus a lot. 

By the way, we didn't drop to five feeds until five months...your lo is younger than I was thinking when I originally posted.

Best of luck!  It may not feel like it but you're doing great.  I don't know where you stand as far as spirituality, but my comfort when I go through crazy times like that (we had a two week period recently where she pretty much had milk, two graham crackers, and a spoonful of baked beans for a few days in a row - at a year old!) is that God gave me my baby because He knew I could take care of her just the way she needs, and He'll show me what I need to do to sustain her and help her flourish.

[Anna & Baby Caleb's Mommy]

At three months, I'd feed her, she'd be awake an hour, then sleep only 45 minutes, so it wouldn't be time for her to eat yet, but since she could only stay up an hour I'd end up having to feed her right before putting her back to sleep and the whole EASY thing turned into EASAESAE...you get my drift.  So anyway, with short naps tossed in, are you sure he's hungry and not just tired sometimes?  My lo was willing to eat any time I was willing to feed her (just like I'm always up for a snack even though I'm not always hungry), but that doens't necessarily mean she NEEDED to eat all the time...it could make the difference between her eating a little versus a lot. 

this is exactly what's going on!!! i just wrote a long post in reply to yours about how dh and i are weak...i question my lopsided supply...his short naps make him cranky....he eats too frequently...i will stay strong today and not give any milk until 3 hour mark...3.5 would be even better...he's not a big crier...just fussy (probably tired) i hoping to fix one and cure the other, hee hee.  i will wean entirely this week, he's showing bottle pref. and bf going badly and i want to end with positive feelings...we worked hard to bf...never thought we'd make it this long...i thank God for that opportunity also thank God for all our other little victories...he's in his crib, in his nursery (i'm on floor) and wakes up once at night, and likes his new formula!!! a lot actually and drinks room temp., hee hee. but short naps are exhausting, putting him down several times a day  , then questioning whether he's actually tired (but i know he is!)  i need to stop second guessing myself and running an errand seems to throw us off for  the entire rest of the day!!!  well, thank you so much for your time and good advice

[mrs_kat]

Well, if you decide to go fully formula, you made it four months with bf and that's great!  You'll eliminate the stress of wondering if he's getting enough so maybe you'll have more energy to deal with the short naps.    There are plenty of suggestions on the nap board for dealing with it - some have had great success using the techniques and some, like mine, just had to grow out of it, but at least it wasn't long before she could stretch out her awake time and we could get back on EASY even with the short naps.  Best of luck!

[Anna & Baby Caleb's Mommy]

I couldn't agree more

  You'll eliminate the stress of wondering if he's getting enough so maybe you'll have more energy to deal with the short naps. 

thank you so much for the encouragement! i'm beginning to think lo is more spirited than i realized, also he changes so much, he's not quite the same as even a month ago   we didn't make the 3 hour mark, i guess we're working up to that his morning ff was only 3.5 oz (not enough ) but i guess we were pretty close, maybe 2 hours 45 min.  thanks again

[sofiasmommy]

Lisi's Mum....My little one will be 10 months this coming weekend and she is only 15lbs! We have MANY friends with babies much younger than her that weigh more than her! HA!! Dr. has never been concerned as she has always gained like a pund a month, never lost anything.

Now onto my weaning questions!! My LO is 10 months and is currently taking 4 bfs a day. 6:30, 10:30/11:00, 2:30/3:00, and then 6:30/7:00......I want her to be fully weaned by the time she hits her 1 yr b-day on Nov. 23rd. I am not sure how or when to start the whole weaning process. She has  no problem taking bottles of EBM, however I have a HUGE problem with pumping...my body does not respond to it at all! She also takes water and diluted juice in sippy cups with no problem. She really never seems hungry...we just eat on a schedule! She has solids 3 times a day and if I give her too much of those, then she DOES NOT want to bf! She sucks a bit and then is done!

Right now, she is the least intersted in her 10:30 feed. She only goes for less then 10 mins and is VERY antsy. The only feed she REALLY wants is her wake up in the morning feed. The other 3 are minimal compared to that one!

So, where and when do I start? How do I go about doing it? If there is a thread somewhere on this, please direct me, as DD doesn't give me enough time to read through all the posts!:) Sorry!!!

[Beata]

Sophiasmommy - I suggest you eliminatethe least important first. Maybe the day feeds...then evening, then you can always decide on the when to do the morning feed. Give yourself at least a few days to a week at each feed. Replace the ones in the day with a snack. or just lunch. I think a normal meal routine for toddlers in general is breakfast, lunch and dinner with 2 snacks, mid-morning and mid afternoon.

My pediatrician gave me the go-ahead at 11 months to switch to milk at about 5 oz (one feed) per week, but definitely as your doctor about that. If your lo takes formula maybe just switch to that.

Good luck 

[sofiasmommy]

Thanks Beata!

I will have to check with her ped to see if we can start milk. I did yogurt with her a month ago and she had a mild rash from it. I was going to try it again here soon.

I just don't really want to do formula with her. So, that is why I want to wait until she is 1 to get the whole milk into her. Just seems easier to continue to bf.

If I cut out a feeding, will she not be getting enough of the nutrients she needs from the milk? That is what I am most worried about.

[Beata]

Have you given her cheese yet? Or other sources of calcium. I would not worry about calories because I think you can replace those...like you said, ask your doctor what to do, especially since she had a reaction to yogurt - I know what it's like to have a dairy protein intolerant baby 

Maybe you can give a vitamin supplement?

[Lovejoy]

sad to be even posting on here - but i feel the time has come for dd to be weaned off the breast.  At the moment 2 feeds: a wake up morning feed and then her bedtime feed (once a week OH gives her a bottle of formula for bed routine)
How do i go about weaning her off - I'm thinking of replacing bedtime feeds with bottle
(or should i give her a beaker - can babies actually drink their milk from beakers?? she drinks water from them, but i don't mind that dribbled/spilt and wasted!!) 
And then slowly weaning off morning feed...gosh i feel sad typing this (we love the morning feed)  but i do want to bf upto 1 year max (she's 11 months old)

[deenz]

Lisi's mum - I got dd2 weighed the day before her birthday, and she only weighs 7.29kg!!  So she's very tiny.  In fact, she's 'fallen off' the NZ growth charts now!  At 9.5m she weighed 6.93kg so didn't put on very much weight in that 2.5m.  She is very busy, crawling, climbing, cruising etc.  I'm not sure whether anyone's worried, as I just took her to get weighed, not to see anyone or anything.  Not sure how I get her to put on more weight, other than feed her more high calorie food???!  Anyway, just to let you know there are other little babies out there... I get so sick of people commenting on her size (well, it depends on how people say it...!).

[MGardner]

I've posted before that I wanted to start to wean - slowly, my DS is 6 months old. I wanted to still BF morning and night. So I started to only pump once a day and supplement with formula, putting half breastmilk half formula in the bottles. Well I'm drying up. I know this because when I feed the baby he is just not satisfied, I think he is also having an issue with the flow too, like he is getting used to the bottle flow. he is just so fussy at the breast sometimes even screaming. It's a miserable experience for both of us. I usually end up giving a bottle to top him off and pumping immediately afterwards. It's like triple duty. What can I do? Is he weaning himself and should I just let this go? My main problem is that we are going on vacation in 4 days. I am so nervous about this in general, taking him on a plane, being in a different place, bringing him to event after event (it's for a family wedding). I REALLY don't want to completely stop BFing now - I didn't want to change anything before this trip! Help!!!

[lissylewis]

Hi there,

I have exclusively breastfed my DS for nearly 11 months, and although I have absolutely loved  it I have has recurrent mastitis and I am getting it more frequently now than I did in the early days.  I have had it nearly 10 times and needed antibiotics for over half of those times.

Anyway I am thinking of weaning but need advice on where to start as I am worried with my abundant supply of getting mastitis again and again.

He has three feeds in the day at 7, 12, 5pm and usually one night feed at aroung 3 or four in the morning.  Sometimes he is not waking for the night feed anymore which is great but it is not always definite.

I feed him before solids as this way works best for him.  We tried the other way around and he wouldn't feed much at all, and sometimes refused.

Any tips pointers would be greatly appreciated.  He will drink from a sippy cup now which is great and we have tried formula and he will take it which is an added bonus.

Where do I start and how long is best to wean over ?

Mel

Ps Is it normal to be very apprehensive about doing this??  I am going to miss it but it is really wearing me out at the same time....

[lucmom]

Hi,
I weaned my LO very slowly over a period of months, but I have several girlfriends who got down to 1 or 2 feeds and did it over a weekend.  I started by dropping the feeds he was least interested in, which for us was the cluster feeds.  I continued to drop one feed a month (again, I know people who have done it a week apart, but I took it slowly to keep from getting too engorged, having my hormones go haywire, and because I wasn't in any rush to stop bf.   Once I got down to morning and night, I dropped them one month apart.  By that time he was over 13 months olds, and we were already off the bottle.  I worked on introducing milk from when he was one (he didn't like it, and drinks soy now) so once I was letting go of those final feeds, I just offered a sippy of milk instead.  (The first day, I had a bottle ready too, just in case, but he went for the sippy. 

The first couple days of the dropping of the last feeds (especially am) LO did look at me quizzically and patted the chair where we'd bf.  I told him "milk's all gone" and offered him the cup and he accepted that and didn't ask after a few days (which made me terribly sad, even though I was happy he was adjusting well).

lissylewis, it is totally normal to be apprehensive.  I felt that it was the right time for us, but I was really sad about it too, mostly because of the end of the special bonding, but also for the soothing power of bf!  The first month after weaning completely, I felt like I'd really lost something, but within another month, DS started reaching out for cuddling and snuggling more throughout the day (which he hadn't done before) so take heart that they find a way to replace the bonding time at their own pace.

By the time I was down to 2 feeds, I didn't have  a problem with engorgement at all, but with the daytime feeds, I sometimes needed to pump for a few minutes to relieve the pressure...it probably made it take a little longer for my body to adjust, but it helped make it a more comfortable process.

MGardner, how is it going?  Could you maybe try using a different bottle where you can control the flow?  Have you tried any of the teas or herbs to increase your milk supply (or even a beer after LO goes to sleep)?  Or maybe it's just the stress of the upcoming trip?  Your body may just be adjusting to the drop in pump and take a little while to readjust to what your LO needs.  It sounds crazy to say try not to worry about it, but you can only do the best you can.  Hang in there and keep us posted.

HTH --

[Samuel's mum]

So I started to only pump once a day and supplement with formula, putting half breastmilk half formula in the bottles. Well I'm drying up. I know this because when I feed the baby he is just not satisfied, I think he is also having an issue with the flow too, like he is getting used to the bottle flow.

MGardner - You do sound quite anxious about the trip so who knows what effect you might be having. I know you were planning on weaning slowly but it's always unpredictable how supply will respond. Some people can maintain only 1 or 2 feeds a day - others can't.

Here's my 2 cents. (adopting big sisterly tone)

I have watched you on these boards work so hard these last few months with pumping at work and worrying about supply (not without much reason but join the club ). You have given it 200%.
You have made a choice to begin the weaning process and it seems to me as though you have a few mixed emotions flying around. You've had such a powerful mindset and 'increase supply/protect supply/how's my supply' and it's difficult to drop that.
OK - so perhaps this isn't going to go at quite the rate you imagined and it might be faster than you'd hoped but weaning is what you decided was right for all of you. You have given it so much and you need to let go a little bit of some of this tension.

You are supposed to be having a reduction in supply. That's the point. It can't always be controlled precisely but overall that is the way it has to go. Have you read of some people recently on the boards with mastitis? - not fun! A reduction in supply it has to be.

Is he weaning himself and should I just let this go?

No - he's not weaning himself. You are weaning him with love and care and it's fine.

I can completely understand you not wanting any big changes before this trip but do you really want to be doing this triple duty thing and having unhappy feeds either?

As it seems as though you may not be able to maintain the feeds you want you have a choice:
Either back track - full force - resume pumping - cut back on bottles - take herbal supplements and change your mind (if you want to do this - it will be mega and it shouldn't be something you do for just a few weeks but a major shift in your thinking). If this is what you really want to do let me know and I can give you some pointers.

Or - and this is what I feel is best in your situation - accept your choice, celebrate all your incredibly hard work and continue on this path. So weaning may be faster than you had anticipated but think about why you chose it in the first place. In the meantime you could consider buying different bottles with variflow control. Or instead of this triple duty thing focus on one time of day where you want to try and keep your supply up e.g. nighttime and only pump then.

It's a miserable experience for both of us

In conclusion - 'miserable' is not good - There will be always be emotions when bf comes to an end (Your hormones are shifting for one). You will lose a tool on your mommy belt but you will find others to replace it that will be special too.

Let it go. Enjoy your trip.
Apologies for sounding bossy.