ok well bw does not advocate cry it out in any way at all. that only breaks the bonds of trust between a lo and the parent so good for you for not going forward with that suggestion! i understand your lo is small - but is she gaining weight and thriving at this point?
if you start something - you have to be consistant with it. i know it is hard not to 'cave' after so long but not sticking with it will just show your lo is she screams enough she will 'get what she wants' kwim? you can't builld rome overnight and you have a few issues to work on first, before pu/pd i think. i would slowly start feeding a bit earlier before bedtime and at least if lo falls asleep be sure to wake her and go through the bedtime routine. walk around with her, talk to her, change diaper if you have to - just make sure she is alert so she knows what is going on. go through the bedtime routine, and turn the lights off and stay in the room with your hand on lo. you may have to do this for even up to a week...at all costs try and settle in the crib. stay until lo is completely asleep - this is the first step in teaching lo to fall asleep independantly. when you feel comfortable or 'like you can' you can slowly start leaving the room sooner and sooner.
as far as naps go i think you could go about it a few different ways to disassociate naps/falling asleep and eating. you could do the same thing as with bedtime or you could give her some water before lo goes down for the nap to keep her belly full until she wakes so she doesn't wake early, and still stay in the room and 'teach' lo how to go to sleep independantly also. you may have to resort to pu/pd if just keeping a hand on lo, or shhing, or patting in the crib fails miserabely. you may want to check out the pu/pd board to get more info/advice about that - as i did pu/pd for bedtime with my lo and kind of did my own version of it and isn't exactly 'by the book'... but you may have to alter it a bit to make it work for you too...just keep with the basics and try not to go too far off.
could she be overstimulated before bed at all? when my lo is overstimulated (
last night for example...
) she is up all night and i get a bright eyes dd in the early hours also.
