Author Topic: routine Qs 9.5mo - where to start from?  (Read 3057 times)

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Offline seaflower

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routine Qs 9.5mo - where to start from?
« on: April 26, 2006, 08:32:51 am »
Hi, I've posted before regarding DD's routine (or lack of it) and constant night nursing... Unfortunately, as I went back to work, nothing has changed since. There are few problems I'm planning to tackle, and not sure where to start from:

1. She sleeps in our bed - need to move her to her cot, and possibly to her own room.
2. Nurses during the night - mainly out of habit, I'd say. It was easier to settle her to sleep that way at the begining, but it is taking its toll now. I haven't stop that until now as I wanted to be sure she is getting enough milk overall, as I am not with her all the time during the day, but I'll be off work in few weeks, so time for change.
3. Naps only 45mins most days, last few days put her in the pram in the garden, seems th e fresh air got her to sleep longer, but can't do that every day as I have to sit next to her and watch her.
4. Doesn't have a routine as such - sleeps every 2.5-3.5 hours, but since the nap lenghts vary, so it the nap times. No routine for BFs and solids either, again eats around every 3 hours.

Don't really know which one to start with, to be honest. I was thinking of gradually trying to intorduce a routine during the day for the next few weeks, and then when I am off work (in a bout a month's time) to start on eliminating night feeds (and giving her water instead) and getting her to nap and sleep in her cot. Does it sound right?

I'm a bit scared to make any changes as I take it so seriously and usually get stressed if things are not 'according to plan'. Few times when I tried to do it, found I was watching the clock all the time and ended up more tired and worried than beforehand... Hope it works this time!
My little princess is 2.5 :) Textbook/Angel/Spirited toddler
My little munchkin is few weeks old and doesn't understnd EASY!

Offline corrina01

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Re: routine Qs 9.5mo - where to start from?
« Reply #1 on: April 26, 2006, 13:02:10 pm »
Do you get her up at the same time in the morning?

How many days do you work?

How many days do you have off to try and implement a routine?

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She sleeps in our bed - need to move her to her cot, and possibly to her own room.

I think she needs to be in her own room and her own cot, to implement the naps and bedtime.  Do you have a bedtime routine?

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Nurses during the night

I think this is the last thing you have to do.

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Naps only 45mins most days,

Does she go to sleep independently?  Most babies at this age have A time 3 hrs or more.  How many naps does she have?  Can she go through the next sleep cycle?

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No routine for BFs and solids either, again eats around every 3 hours.

You will want to change to feeding every 4hrs.

I'll post my routine when my DD was about your age.

6.15am Wake and play in cot
6.45am Feed
8am Solids
8.45-9am Sleep
10am Wake
11am Feed
12noon Solids
1-1.15pm Sleep
2.45-3pm Wake
3.30pm Feed
4.45pm Solids
6.30pm Feed
6.45pm Bed for the night

Try not to get too stressed out if things are not going according to plan, as your DD will pick up on that, so you and she will both get stressed and things will definitely not go according to plan.

Just go by her tired cues and note the time down.

HTH
Corrina
Mum to Faith
A very spirited toddler with a touch of angel



Offline seaflower

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Re: routine Qs 9.5mo - where to start from?
« Reply #2 on: April 26, 2006, 13:35:50 pm »
Thanks for your reply, Corina01.

She does wake up at (around) the same time every morning - 5:45-6 am (we've been away fro two weeks so hopefully she will be back to her usual 7am wakings soon).

I teach, so only go to college for the classes, it differes every day, but the childminer is keen on setting up a routine too. I'm off work for the summer in few weeks so planning the big changes then, until then would love to get set times for feeds and naps, and possibly get her to nap/sleep in her cot. Think it will be easier to move her to her own room then.

Bedtime routine - we have a short one - bath (every second day), nappy change, in her grobag and BF to sleep. If her dad is getting he to sleep he walk with her in his arms.

She sometimes goes through the next sleep cycle, at the moment for example she is still asleep 1.5 hours later (2:30 pm currently). I usually nurse her to sleep, but last few days would leave her in her buggy in the garden and she is asleep within minutes, no rocking, etc - is that 'independently'? :) she would have 2-3 naps depending on their length.

I was looking at the routines in the other thread, and picked one very similar to the one you just posted. So far so good for today. I will try and get the times sorted out, and then will try and get her to nap at this times in her cot. She is very adaptable baby in general... (textbook/angel/spirited... didn't even know this combination exists :))

Will keep you posted how are we getting on. I have to do more reading of the other posts when I get a chance.

My little princess is 2.5 :) Textbook/Angel/Spirited toddler
My little munchkin is few weeks old and doesn't understnd EASY!

Offline corrina01

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Re: routine Qs 9.5mo - where to start from?
« Reply #3 on: April 26, 2006, 20:24:13 pm »
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but last few days would leave her in her buggy in the garden and she is asleep within minutes, no rocking, etc - is that 'independently'

Yes that is independently.  As she can go to sleep independently, I would do it for all her naps and bedtime as well.

What you have to do, is not BF her to sleep, or your DH getting her to sleep in his arms, this is accidental parenting.  You can BF before the nap, but put her down before she is asleep, so she knows how to go to sleep on her own.  If she falls asleep at the breast, gently rouse her, before putting her to bed.

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(textbook/angel/spirited... didn't even know this combination exists


Just my DD  ;D

They are very adaptable, but if they don't like they will let you know, but do it all the same, they will come round to your way of thinking sooner, rather than later.



Corrina
Mum to Faith
A very spirited toddler with a touch of angel



Offline HeatherC

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Re: routine Qs 9.5mo - where to start from?
« Reply #4 on: April 27, 2006, 01:32:18 am »
Hi!  Just wondering if you have the "Solves All Your Problems" book.  There are very good cases in the book directly related to your #1 & 2 questions.  I'll type them out for you if you do not have the book, or if you do have it I'll give you the pages to reference.
Like Corrina said, you'll want to space her feedings at 4 hours apart.  How manyl solid meals is she currently having?  I would assume 3 at her age.  If she has a wake time of 7, you could either bf then offer breakfast, or wait 30 mins - 1 hr later for breakfast.  Then, after being awake probably 2-2.5 hrs, she'll probably be ready for her nap.  At her age, timing for naps is the key as they need enough awake/activity time to make them tired enough to have a good nap.  If she is consistently napping for only 45 mins, you should take note of how much awake time she's having and find which length of times promote better naps.  Just as not enough A time can lead to short naps, so can too much A time.  If a lo is overtired, they have a hard time settling in for sleep and as they go through a sleep transition they can't fully make it back into a deep sleep and become aggitated and wake.
So, say she's bf at 7, had breakfast by 8, then napped at 9 or 9:30 until hopefully 11, she'd then need to bf again, and start the cycle over with lunch and dinner.  She would have another nap probably around 1 or 1:30, perhaps nap until 3, bf again, have supper around 5 (for example), then do your evening activities such as bath, and bf before bed which would probably be about 7.  Now, none of this may suite you or your dd's needs, but these are just examples.  She may be able to tolerate much longer A times since she has some textbook and angel in her, so you would need to watch her sleepy signs to know when exactly she'd be ready for a nap. 
Kelsey, Feb. 4, 2005
Landon, Jan. 2, 2007

Offline seaflower

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Re: routine Qs 9.5mo - where to start from?
« Reply #5 on: May 06, 2006, 10:21:38 am »
Thanks, Corrina01 and HeatherC!

DD has been cutting a new tooth, and had blocked nose for few days so our plans were a bit postponed. I've been introduing a routine during the day, mainly for the naps - at 9-9:30 am and 1-2pm (depends on how long the first one was). She is starting to have at least one of the naps 1.5-2 hours :)
Also put a blackout curtain in our bedroom, so she sleeps until 7am in the morning :P

The feeding times still wary a bit as I am nursing her to sleep sometimes, but that will be the next to eliminate once she settles in a routine. So I've given myself another week or two to establish the routine, and then will work on the other issues.

PS Don't have much time to read/post recently, hence the delayed reply. Thanks again, you are a great help and motivation!
My little princess is 2.5 :) Textbook/Angel/Spirited toddler
My little munchkin is few weeks old and doesn't understnd EASY!

Offline corrina01

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Re: routine Qs 9.5mo - where to start from?
« Reply #6 on: May 06, 2006, 14:06:57 pm »
Way to go Seaflower, I wish my DD would sleep 2hrs, it only happens now and again.  Before 8 months she done 2 x 2hrs naps.

Keep it up, you are doing a great job  ;D
Corrina
Mum to Faith
A very spirited toddler with a touch of angel



Offline seaflower

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Re: routine Qs 9.5mo - where to start from?
« Reply #7 on: May 20, 2006, 10:20:21 am »
Hi, just a quick update and a few questions.

I concentrated on setting some routine for DD last few weeks and it is going OK. The main problem is that she is napping different lenght of time every day, so while her first nap is around 9:30-10am, the next one could be starting anywhere from 1 to 2:30pm. Not really sure how to go about this, tried to stick to set times (1:30) but some days she is just not tired and would take me an hour to get her to sleep, by then we both are exhauted!!

I also managed to get her to fall asleep in her cot, now only for the evening (7:30pm). After a breastfeed in our bed I transfer her to her cot a little sleepy but still awake. Last night it only took 5 minutes of complaing before she fell asleep ;D ;D She usually wakes up several times a night and I get her to sleep be feeding her, so she sleeps next to me - last night she woke up at 3:30 and didn properly fall asleep for ages! Wanted to play! So got her in her pram and put her in her room - sleep until 8:30am :) Guess it is time to move her cot to her own room, but for some reason I'm really scared to do it!

Do you think I should be more consistent with her nap times/places? I find it pretty hard as it is, tbh. I'm off work in few weeks and will be able to spend much more time day and night dealing with sleep issues...

She is also a very light sleeper, and DH on the other side is quite noisy walking around, turning in bed, etc... I'm really trying to find the courage  and energy to move her to her room :(
My little princess is 2.5 :) Textbook/Angel/Spirited toddler
My little munchkin is few weeks old and doesn't understnd EASY!

Offline corrina01

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Re: routine Qs 9.5mo - where to start from?
« Reply #8 on: May 20, 2006, 10:51:11 am »
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the next one could be starting anywhere from 1 to 2:30pm

I just go on my DD's tired cues for her afternoon nap.

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Guess it is time to move her cot to her own room, but for some reason I'm really scared to do it!

Go for it, you'll be able to get more sleep as she will  ;D

You sound like you are doing a really good job, keep at it.
Corrina
Mum to Faith
A very spirited toddler with a touch of angel



Offline seaflower

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Re: routine Qs 9.5mo - where to start from?
« Reply #9 on: May 20, 2006, 11:07:03 am »
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Guess it is time to move her cot to her own room, but for some reason I'm really scared to do it!
Go for it, you'll be able to get more sleep as she will  ;D
I think antispating the move is worse than the actual action ;)

Thanks corrina, think we may move the cot this weekend, if I don't chicken out!
My little princess is 2.5 :) Textbook/Angel/Spirited toddler
My little munchkin is few weeks old and doesn't understnd EASY!

Offline HeatherC

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Re: routine Qs 9.5mo - where to start from?
« Reply #10 on: May 20, 2006, 13:06:43 pm »
One way to stay consistant with the naptimes would be to wake her from the first nap so that you'll know she'll be tired enough when you want the next nap to start.  Otherwise, letting her get the sleep she needs is also a good thing, and go by her cues for the next nap.
I think if you transition her to her own room and own bed, you'll see the night waking decrease.  It's easier to wake over every little noise when they're sleeping right next to you, and she might be waking from noises you and your dh make.  Having her sleep in her crib every sleep time will take some work if she's not used to it, but you must be consistent and firm.  Use pu/pd for hours if you have to b/c it will greatly pay off.  Don't expect it to work right away, but it will work.  You might have to try the trick of sitting next to her each night as she falls asleep and then slowly move closer to the door each night until she no longer needs you.  Each time you give in and bring her to your bed you will have to start the process over.  You can do this!! 
Kelsey, Feb. 4, 2005
Landon, Jan. 2, 2007

Offline seaflower

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Re: routine Qs 9.5mo - where to start from?
« Reply #11 on: May 20, 2006, 14:05:23 pm »
She is asleep for her second nap at the moment, in her cot, in her OWN room ;D

Hope it goes well and we don't go mad in the next few days, I'll update you soon how it progresses. Thanks for all the encouragement!!
My little princess is 2.5 :) Textbook/Angel/Spirited toddler
My little munchkin is few weeks old and doesn't understnd EASY!

Offline seaflower

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Re: routine Qs 9.5mo - where to start from?
« Reply #12 on: May 22, 2006, 09:20:22 am »
Two nights later and I am ready to take her back into our bed. The lack of sleep is killing me, last night got 4 hours - 2am-6am, with a waking at 5am to take her for a feed (and we both fell asleep).

I'll have to go to the sleep forum and see how the others manags, I seriously doubt it I will :(
My little princess is 2.5 :) Textbook/Angel/Spirited toddler
My little munchkin is few weeks old and doesn't understnd EASY!

Offline seaflower

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Re: routine Qs 9.5mo - where to start from?
« Reply #13 on: May 29, 2006, 20:36:06 pm »
Hi, I'm back. We survived the first week of DD being in her own cot, she is getting quicker to settle (2-5mins as opposite to 45min to an hour!) but she still wakes up every hour screaming as if she had a nightmare. I've resolved to sleeping on the floor next to her few times as quicker I get to her, the quicker she falls asleep.

I also only breastfeed her during the night at 12am and 4am, will gradually strech it even more in the next two weeks as I'll be off work afterwards and will be able to ensure she gets enough milk during the day.

Any ideas regarding the wakings?
My little princess is 2.5 :) Textbook/Angel/Spirited toddler
My little munchkin is few weeks old and doesn't understnd EASY!

Offline HeatherC

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Re: routine Qs 9.5mo - where to start from?
« Reply #14 on: May 30, 2006, 00:26:31 am »
Is she waking with a scream at naps or during the night, or both?  It is possible she could be having bad dreams, or teething, or tummy pains that make it hard to sleep.  It's good that you're there to settle her so quickly.  Is she out of sorts like she is confused as to where she is?  Does she sit or stand up, or stay laid down? 
Kelsey, Feb. 4, 2005
Landon, Jan. 2, 2007

Offline seaflower

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Re: routine Qs 9.5mo - where to start from?
« Reply #15 on: May 30, 2006, 16:54:29 pm »
She is waking up like that all the time, sounds like nightmares to me as she is pretty confused trying to sit up but sometimes half asleep. When I go and  put my hand on her back goes quickly back to sleep, at least most of the time. I'm starting to feel like a hostige, have to wait until she is fast asleep to get out of the room... I know it is only a week since we started in her room, and we've gone a long way with the routine and no nursing to sleep... but it is so hard!!! I wish the results were quicker!

She is also going to a babysitter for the last month, and keeps cryign there, defenitelly very insecure.
My little princess is 2.5 :) Textbook/Angel/Spirited toddler
My little munchkin is few weeks old and doesn't understnd EASY!

Offline HeatherC

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Re: routine Qs 9.5mo - where to start from?
« Reply #16 on: May 31, 2006, 00:17:29 am »
I wish I had more to offer, but it could be separation anxiety.  Have you browsed the Sleep boards for any ideas?
Give it some more time.  You've made such great progress.
Kelsey, Feb. 4, 2005
Landon, Jan. 2, 2007

Offline seaflower

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Re: routine Qs 9.5mo - where to start from?
« Reply #17 on: May 31, 2006, 09:36:59 am »
Thanks Heather, I did post on the sleep board as well and got few ideas. Just wanted to post a follow up here as well. Not much time to browse these days :(

Left a night light on in her room last night, she slept a little bit better. Will buy a proper night light and try that as she seems genuinly scared.

Thanks again, really appreciate all the help and encouragement I get here.
My little princess is 2.5 :) Textbook/Angel/Spirited toddler
My little munchkin is few weeks old and doesn't understnd EASY!