anyone want to chat about the 2-1 nap switch?

[becky1969]

I've been eyeing this thread with dread for months - knowing someday I'd be doomed to haunt the 2-1 halls along with the rest of you!  Looks like that time is NOW! ARrrrrrghhhhhh! The scream of the damned! 

Well, I was an idiot and thought we had the 2-1 nap thing kicked at 12 months. He magically started taking a long nap around 12 pm! Bliss! Then that all went to hell after about 2 weeks. I don't know if that was just a brief mistake, or if the molars started interfering. At any rate, we ended up going back to 2 naps with much success - it cleared up our 6 months of night wakings, and he was sleeping thru the night again! Yahoo!

However, now we're having bedtime problems. It's taking him 1-1.5 hours to fall asleep, where normally it takes him 15-30 minutes. I'm wondering if it's time to ditch that 2nd nap. Yesterday we skipped it, but only b/c we're having our house sided and their working on LO's wall. ugh. He got a 15 minute cat nap in the car, and that was it. Hence, a NW from 4:30-6:30. Mommy very tired. Daddy very tired. Baby very tired.

Did you guys have bedtime problems? Was there a certain time of day where you had make sure you didn't nap past? I've been waking him at 4, but maybe that's too late? We've been doing a 30 minute nap at 11, and then a longer nap around 2:30. It's hard, because he's not sleepy earlier in the AM, but he needs a good 3-3.5 hours of A time before that 2nd nap. So, I think we're in the squeeze that makes you resort to 1 nap. Boo.  Part of the problem is his wake up in the morning is usually 8 am. If I woke him at 7 or 7:30, I might be able to cling to the 2 naps longer. But I so love that 8 am wake up! It's a shame to give it up!

Any advice??

[KathrynK]

hi Becky
I too used to wake Sophie at 4pm- then a couple of weeks ago we started to get those darn 5.30am wakings again, so I started waking her at 3.30pm, and hey presto! It worked almost immediately and she was going through till her usual time of 6.30 again.
Hmmmm, 8am, what's that like?! I can only wish...
I know from reading posts on various threads that some of the guys have trimmed that am nap to as short as 10 minutes in order to keep it for longer. You could try 20 mins and see how that goes?
dd's been a nightmare for naps this week and has just had 2 days at daycare which doesn't help. Her nap today was from 10.45 to 11.30 and that was it. aargh. Bed at 6 tonight. It's just me and her tomorrow so am going to have a low key day and try my hardest to get 2 naps out of her!

[M and N's Mom]

BabyBsMommy...I think it was/is overtiredness.  I didn't really see it during the day but then we started having earlier wakings in the morning.  So, I have ditched the 30 min nap for a couple of days to try to get him back on track.  Yesterday he had 45min in the morning and 1.25h in the afternoon.  Today he had 1h in the morning and 1.5h in the afternoon.  I'll see when he wakes up in the morning to see how much time I let him have for his am nap tomorrow. 

Thanks

[becky1969]

kathryn - i think i will try the shorter AM nap, thanks. The PM nap seems to make all the difference - if we have to shorten something, it definitely should be the AM.

I read your earlier posts, and had to read outloud to my DH the part where your DD was waving to the other babies and saying "Hiya!".  I know it's annoying about the napping, but how cute is that?!?!? I also could totally relate when you said how stressed out you get on bad nap days b/c you usually have a good sleeper. Amen, sister! That's totally how I am. Owen has always been a fabulous napper (though his night sleep has needed work on more than one occasion!  ), and a bad nap day just puts me on edge. Plus, I work at home while he sleeps, so when he doesn't sleep, I don't work and make money. VERY frustrating! So hugs to us both - hopefully we'll all make it to the other side of the 2-1 transition in one piece!

[BabyBsMommy]

Becky - DS started having a tough time at bedtime so we had to keep at least 3 hours A time before bed.  That changed to 3.5 hours minimum shortly before we finally got settled into one nap.

Layla - Do you think you're lo needs more A time before the PM nap?  DS could go on FOREVER with a 30min nap in the AM.  He would wake at 7am, get put down for his AM nap around 10:00 and would sleep from about 10:15-10:45 (we had to wake him up about half of the time).  He could then do 3.5 hours of A time before a PM nap. 

[KathrynK]

becky - I know it sounds sooo cute but I just wish she would sleep! aargh We are at home today so I am trying for 2 naps- it's 9.45 and have just put her down so we'll wait and see what happens.... Glad we are going through this together! I have been really lucky so far that we have had 3 awful nap days in a row but so far nights have been great- 12 hrs solid without a peep from her! Keep your fingers crossed for me....

Layla- I would try more A time before 2nd nap too and see if that lengthens it. It must be hard for you and lo with teething and SA. We are coming out the other side of SA now. I haven't done W2S so can't offer a suggestion on that. Hope you have a better day today. {hugs} to you xx

[KathrynK]

Oh Layla I am so sorry you feel so bad at the moment, I don't know what to say I wish I could give you a hug. I think it probably is a combination of the time change and the SA causing her sleep problems. I think I read elsewhere your clocks have gone back? When ours went back in October dd's sleep went bonkers and I felt like it took weeks to get back on track. She was waking at 5 every day and at 11 months old it coincided with the start of this transition and having to cut her naps. I would go to bed at night dreading waking up the next morning - I would wake when dd did, look at the clock and just lay there and cry, as it said 4.45am or 5am. Also we have just had 2 months of full blown SA although I was really lucky as it didn't affect her sleep that much, but during her A times, boy was it hard going. Just like you I wanted to leave at times. All I did to get through it was keep telling myself it's not her fault, she's not doing it on purpose, she needs me, I have to be strong. I forgot about housework and cooking etc for the whole time and just spent all my time with her- I even took her to the toilet with me. It worked- now she is miles better and will let me leave the room again.
Maybe try stretching her first A time more gently, say 15 mins at a time. Or keep her up but try something different- if I want to keep dd up a bit longer without getting overtired I take her out in the pushchair.
You are doing a fab job, try not to be so hard on yourself. I know it's difficult, we are all our own biggest critics. Sorry I can't give more practical advice but remember it's just another phase and it will pass eventually, they always do. It just feels like forever when you're in the middle of it.
I have to go as if I don't wake dd now she won't go down again this afternoon 
Post back or pm me to let me know how you are and I will get on again a bit later xxxx

[M and N's Mom]

Just wanted to send you great big HUGS Layla!  You have given me good advice, I wish I could send some back your way    Is there someone who could watch the kids while you go out and do something fun for a couple of hours?  Shopping alone...lunch/dinner with the girls or DH...something else you enjoy?

Hang in there...this too will pass!

[UNCMomma]

Hugs Layla, hang in there!  This is the hardest of all transitions don't you think?  And after this, there is only one more (no nap) which isn't so bad so just keep going and you'll get through it!  These babies have their ways of making us feel like crappy mothers some days, but be assured that you're a wonderful mother who is doing a great job, otherwise you wouldn't be here!  Keep at it, and get a little time away to get refreshed.   

[debo620]

Layla, I have dealt with those ealy wakings before:
things that helped us were:
1.leave in crib til desired time, reassuring if necesarry
2.delaying am nap til desired time but then offer pm nap sooner
3. delay breakfast
so for us,
if Noah is awake at normal time and awake 3hrs before a 30min am nap then he is in his crib for the pm nap 3hrs later and asleep by the 3.5hr mark
if he woke early (like 40min or 1hr early) then I do the 30min am nap at normal time if possible but because he was up for so long before the am nap, I usually have him in crib 2.5hrs later and he is asleep by the 3hr mark. then 15min early to bed. 

we are dealing with multiple teeth at this point, he was up at 7:20am after asleep by 8, I didn't here him at all in the night--so I thought pretty good night for us. well he was having total metldowns over EVERYTHING and barely made it til 10am nap and went right to sleep. hopefully he'll wake in better spirits. We have had so many nights this week where he has only had 10hrs at night due to him being up in the night awake for 1hr for no apparent reason and not crying or anything. I think its the teeth. It so frustrating though to try and get him caught up on that sleep---doesn't seem to nap any longer nor does putting him to bed early help him add on sleep.

katnryn,
good luck with the naps today. wow that greats that Sophie will sleep 12hrs soid at night. I don't think I would get much for naps if Noah slept 12hrs at night. I can see that getting a bit tricky for you.

[KathrynK]

managed to get 2 naps in today- 30 mins this morning and an hour this afternoon. so we are back to normal bedtime for the first time in almost a week- am hoping she sleeps ok tonight.
deb- this is the first time ever she has slept 12 hrs- it's usually 11- 11.5. She wakes at 6.12am every day, you could set your clock by her. I would try W2S but am terrified that I'll wake her and she'll start her day at 5.12 am instead! aargh.

[UNCMomma]

Layla... could you do the 2 short naps and an earlier bedtime?  Or do early bedtimes cause early wakings for yall?

[becky1969]

Layla - I've been at the throw-em-out-the-window stage. It's so hard to keep your cool when they aren't sleeping! Sleeping makes such a difference in their mood and ours. I would have thrown in the towel ages ago if I didn't have this website to keep me going!!!!

Is DD2 a little touchy? My son is angel/textbook, but he has enough touchy in him that a little bit of overtiredness does us in completely. I'm thinking if she's having so little daytime sleep and rough nights, that she's just pure knackered. When that happens, I usually have to put him down way early for both naps and bedtime for a couple of days until he catches up, and then we can sort out the routine issues.  Once we get 1 good nap in (even if the other one stinks), then we can figure out where the glitch is - too little A time? too much? bedtime too early? too late?


Our report card for today: Last night went well! I didn't get him down for a PM nap until 4:15, so I let him sleep until 5:00 (AM nap was 1.25 hr). I'm giving him a longer AM nap right nwo b/c of the siding going up - the AM nap coincides with their lunch time, so it's the only time of day when I can count on 30+ minutes without hammering! So I let him sleep as long as he wants, just in case we can't get a PM nap. I was worried with waking him so late that bedtime would be a bear, but I put him in his crib at 8 pm, and he was asleep by 8:30! I was so happy b/c he was taking 1-1.5 hours to fall asleep. I now suspect overtiredness on those occasions. I started wind down earlier last night than I have been. I think he's more tired than I think - his sleep cues are so crazy now. He seems happy right up to the minute he's ready to drop from exhaustion! He slept without a peep until 6 am when he started sobbing in a weird way. I calmed him, and tho he was awake, I went back to bed. He must have fallen back to sleep too b/c I didn't hear from him again until 7:30.

Anyway, I think maybe we do still need 2 naps on most days. This is all so confusing! Today is probably a 1 npa day b/c he didn't go down until noon due to playgroup. Argh.

[Zoey]

Well - Owen woke at 7am, I put him down for his nap at 1130am and he slept til 2pm.  I really want his naps to begin at 1230/1pm, will that ever happen??  Am I just silly??  Can I slowly keep pushing it later and later and pray to the Sleep Gods?  Anyhow, I'm thinking a 630pm bedtime (thank Hagan) tonight is in order.

Zoe

[becky1969]

Zoey, my Owen will probably have a 6/6:30 bedtime today too.

From what I've read, I think that nap DOES slowly get later and later, as they stretch their A time. You seem like you're doing great, to be getting a 2.5 hour nap like that! When we do 1 nap days, it's tough to get him to sleep much more than 1.5 hours, which makes him even more tired by bed. He just woke from his nap - It was about 11:50-1:45, so not quite 2 hours. Taht's pretty good for him. I'm guessing the #$*O&@"$(*74 hammering woke him up.