Wake to sleep success stories?

[caf_uk]

Hi all,

I've been trying wake to sleep with varying success (or failure!?) for the past few days as lo is always waking after 30mins.  She's 8weeks, on 3 hour EASY. I wanted to hear other people's techniques that worked, and how long it took as I'm getting really disheartened that its not working at all!  I've been trying to apply hand pressure, going in 5mins before she stirs but sometimes she doesn't re-settle properly for up to 45min (she does a lot of mantra crying but doesn't seem fully awake), at which time the naptime is almost over anyway.

Help!

Catherine

[Caroline-Charlies Mummy]

Hello Catherine,

Have you tried going in a little (couple of minutes) earlier, and actually making her stir. With wake to sleep, you don't wait for her to stir - by then it's already too late, as you are not just trying to help her through her sleep transition, you are also trying to reset her sleep cycles. I always think of this as like a programme on a washing machine - you are resetting the programme before the last cycle has finished, therefore making it longer, and teaching her little body to be able to sleep longer (I know, rubbish analogy, but whatever works for you, eh ).

This is also a good link for you (has some success stories in too) https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=43311.0

[caf_uk]

Hiya,

Yeah today I decided to go in at 20mins and stir her but found she was in too deep a sleep.  Went back a couple of minutes later and tried again and she managed to get past the 30min wake up but then woke at 45mins.  I'll keep trying this and see how it goes.  It's all in the timing I think and I definitely found it was too late if she had already started stirring.

[Elphyrafire]

I have had success with it at naptime and about 50% success at night. (DS now does 1.5 hours twice a day and a catnap- it was about 5x45 mins before-terrible and cranky all day)

Anyway, there's 2 ways to do it. You described her in " too deep sleep"- that's it! That's when you do it! Yes, it's hard. With my DS I had to pick him up and flip him onto his other side. None of this "lightly brush his cheek": that didn't cut it with DS. I think Deep Sleep comes in the first 20 mins so I would go in at 20 mins and flip him.
Now... the other way. Go in at 40 mins and wait until lo stirs. He cannot see you or game over! This is tricky. When you see him twitch either apply pressure on his arms and legs or started patting his back. DH is much better at this than I am and I don't know why. Some say it's b/c men have bigger palms for the pat on the back- or should I say "FIRM pat." It's not a light pat. Also, try to cover his eyes with your hand- that was the clincher for my DS.

Also, I had to do it for EVERY nap for about 4 days. It was exhausting but now we have 1.5 hour naps so YAY! Just bring a book in the room with you and wait.

One other thing: If you are serious:
First, I would take a day to chart your babies' sleep pattern and it will help you figure out when to do W2S down to the minute. One day I sat and watched DS nap. For ex might look like this:
9:00 alseep:
Snoring
9:18- flinched/ snoring stops (every day... same time in cycle!)
9:22- moved head
9:31- restless- fluttery eyes
9:42- awake

Ok- so in my example, by 9:18 its' too late for my DS- he's already rising to the surface to REM sleep.
Hope that helps! Drop me a message if you want.

[caf_uk]

Thanks for the info.  Tried again today with some success in the last afternoon nap, she slept until feed time and she did do some crying at about 45mins but settled back down luckily.  She sleeps with a radio on static and I found that turning it off for a second stirs her very easily but she does seem to go right back into her sleep once I put it back on - is that what I'm aiming for?

Would you suggest that if she's waking up crying at 30mins and usually between 30-40mins that I need to be going in to 'wake' her around the 20min mark?  Once I've done that do I leave and see what she does or do I stay and hold her arms and legs etc? 

We tried holding her arms and applying pressure (I don't really pat her as it gets her more angry and revved up usually so I just hold her arms and shush her, maybe some rubbing of the back or tummy.) for about 5days, every naptime, going in at 25mins and staying until 45mins but it didn't seem to be working at all as she still did her cry bits at 30 and 40 mins and usually more.  Was I still not going in soon enough?

I will watch her tomorrow to see exactly what time she is stirring.  I just really want this to work as I'm at my wits end!
 

[Elphyrafire]

is that what I'm aiming for?
Yes, that's what you're aiming for. It seems to be diff for all babies.  For mine, he needs a full out flip in the air, for yours, looks like the radio may be the trick. Remember, you have to do it before the stirring comes (or at least in my experience). The idea is to wake them out of the deep sleep so they will "restart" the sleep cycle and add on more at the end. Then they'll get used to sleeping longer periods.
The other way ( the one where you apply pressure etc when they stir) is to "help" them get to the next cycle in hopes they will later be able to do it themselves.  This one didn't work as well for my DS as he would always open his eyes and see me before I dove to the floor.
Two diff theories.


"Would you suggest that if she's waking up crying at 30mins and usually between 30-40mins that I need to be going in to 'wake' her around the 20min mark?  Once I've done that do I leave and see what she does or do I stay and hold her arms and legs etc?  "
I would first watch her and see when her first stir is then the NEXT nap go in before that. In my example, my DS's first stir is always 18 mins past going to sleep so I need to go in before that to catch him deep sleeping.
Then you can leave and wait....if it worked then the stirring shouldn't happen at the 45 min mark b/c it resets.

 What did you do today that got her past 30 mins?

Edited to say: I'm not an expert in this (I don't want to step on any moderators toes). This is just something that worked for us. We still have a myriad of other problems 

[caf_uk]

I'll take all the help I can get1  To get her past the 30mins I have found turning the radio off at about 20-23mins worked.  She still woke at around 40/45mins though.  I'm going to watch her this morning and see what she does from the start of going to sleep to check if that is early enough.  Will let you know how I get on.

[EASYconfusedMom]

Hi there,

I just wanted to add that we had a similar problem with DD waking around 20-30 mins and again at 45 mins.  What I did first was just sit and watch her sleep for two or three naps, and wrote down every time she stirred and when I needed to intervene.  That's when I realized that I needed to be there for the 20 mins mark.  once we got her past that (just putting hand on her tummy or head) then we worked on the 45 min mark.  That took a lot longer!  Finding just the right amount of "poking" to get her to stir was the hardest, I would either do too much or not enough.  Then I also found that I had to be there at the 45 mins for added support with a hand on her head to get her through.  It took over a month of doing this partly because the smallest noise would wake her even with white noise and ruin her nap.  I also sometimes missed the window    But it did eventually work and boy what a difference!  we had two 1.5 hour naps that let me get some rest, get some work done or just have down time.  It let me refresh so I was ready for the night!

I know it is frustrating, but keep at it!  We are all behind you!
Jennifer (& Ashleigh)

[caf_uk]

It's funny how so many of us have exactly the same observations of our lo's!  Yesterday I watched all her naps and she seems to do a little twitchy stirring at about somewhere between 16 and 18 minutes ish so I think I will try stirring her at about 15minutes and see how we go.  If that's too early I'll try maybe 17minutes.

Couldn't try it today as we were out all day visiting friends with dd sleeping in the pram.

Here's hoping it works!

[caf_uk]

Well mixed results today.  Went and stirred her at 16/17minutes (had to fully lift her head up and turn it a bit) and twice she got past the 30minutes but cried out at 45minutes.  Managed to settle her both times though and she ended up getting 2hours this morning and about 1hour after lunch.  Yay!  This afternoon she woke up at 25minutes - don't really know why but also managed to settle her with the dummy.  I'm thinking since she did a full wake up this time I will go back and stir her at 16minutes again and see what happens...

How many days should I do this before I let her have a go on her own?

[Elphyrafire]

Hey Congrats! For  me, it was about 4 days and then I forgot to go in and he just did it himself. Hope it keeps working for you!

[EASYconfusedMom]

I don't remember how many successful WTS attempts I had before DD did it by herself.  I think that the book suggests three days straight.  I know I had a hard time getting them in a row, so it probably took 5-6 successful attempts.  I remember that I fell asleep and to my delight woke up an hour later because she hadn't cried out.

Jennifer

[UNCMomma]

We've had similar results with W2S for naps, we can sometimes get past the 30 min mark but not the 45 min mark.  So I've tried going in at 20 min and again at 37 min (40 min is too late!)  and stirring her.  It's not 100% but it works SOME.  Better than 6 45 min naps in one day!  (exhausting for Everybody!)  Keep at it!

Amanda

[caf_uk]

Well, I've tried going in at 17mins and again at 34mins with about 80% success rate, hooray!  I've yet to try her on her own as its only been a few days with some disruptions with us going out etc.  I think she needs a few more days.  Thanks for all your help and advice!  Hopefully extended naps will help with her night wakings which are becoming more frequent...

[UNCMomma]

Good job!  WIth my LO it took a few days of being 'back on track' with better naps before night sleep improved.  Now I guess I'll just camp out at my house for the next year so my LO can get good day sleep and we can all get good night sleep!   

Amanda