Having to force 1st mouthful

[i-wei]

Aidan is 17mths.  We've been having this problem for a while now but it seems to be getting worse and I now dread going out and feeding him in public.

For breakfast and lunch (he's fine with tea) he will refuse what we offer him.  If I keep offering it to him he will scream in protest until I take whatever I am offering to him away.  I must admit that I usually place the food in his mouth whilst his mouth is open and as soon as it is in his mouth he will eat it and continue eating his meal as normal.  I don't understand why he is doing this.  Surely if he wasn't hungry then he wouldn't eat it as soon as he's had a taste of what I'm offering?  The screaming and wiggling is getting so bad now that I'm thinking of just offering the food to him 3 times and if he still refuses to let it go until the next meal.  If I do this, do you think I should still offer him his pudding when he's refused his savory?

Here is an example of what he eats.

9am - 4oz milk & wheatabix followed by fruit
1pm - Some kind of sandwich (1 slice of bread) follwed by fruit
4:30pm - snack (usually crackers or fruit)
7pm - cod & veg pasta bake followed by yogurt

Any thoughts and advice very much appreciated.

Thank you

Ivy

[Katet]

Personally, I'd put the food in front of him & let him try to feed himself & if he refuses, then stop & wait until later & see what happens. My 11mo has just started refusing the spoon, but if I give him a spoon & let him help feed himself, he is happy to eat.

I don't think forcing food is a good idea & I think it is natural at his age to want to start having some control, messy as it is, it is a good time to let him self feed & control his own eating... toddlers will never starve themselves, so just take it away & offer it later, but don't offer a food he likes more as that WILL become a habit.

[*Nicola*]

Hiya Ivy

I agree with the post above.  The main thing is to try not to make it a big issue.  If it becomes an issue for you then it is more likely to be an issue for your ds. 

If he refuses food consistently at breakfast and lunch but not at tea, it's probably a habit for him anyway - unfortunatley we sometimes don't see this til we are right in the thick of it  .  You also say that he begins to eat the food when you put it in his mouth for him ... is it possible that this is how he now associates beginning to eat, as opposed to eating himself?

As the post above says, I'd step back and let him get on with it himself, feeding, making a mess etc.  Remember to praise him tonnes when he does eat.  The only other thing I'd consider trying if it continues is to have lunch in another location.  Kitchen instead of dining room or big table instead of high chair - whatever applies to you.  This may help break the behaviour for him.

HTH I'm sure you'll get some good advice here

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