Nap trouble-not time to drop it, right???

[Jessi]

Hi Ladies,
  Seems that there are all sorts of fun sleep problems popping up at this age! DS is almost 26 mo. and has been a GREAT sleeper up until now.  Looking at the post about "What does your toddler's day look like," I saw that his nap was earlier than most others.  He usually wakes between 6 and 7, then was going down for a nap around 11:30, for 2-3 hrs., then to bed by 7:30.  In the last month, I started to notice that he still seemed pretty awake at normal nap time, so started to push it back to 12-12:30.  In the last two weeks, we've struggled with that.  He seems tired around 11, then I feed him lunch, give him a bit of mellow activity time, and try to put him down for his nap.  He only napped every other day last week.  The other days we battled for about a half hour and I let him get up.  I thought pushing it back would help him to fall asleep easier, but it hasn't worked that way.  I'm not sure what to do at this point.  I also have a 5 mo. old daughter and DS's naptimes are my one break during the day.  What can I do?  I'm desperately in need of advice!

[tylersmommy]

Tyler's gone through quite a few nap skipping phases, and he always comes back around to normal again. He'll go for a couple of weeks of only napping half the time, then he'll suddenly go back to napping consistently. What we've done is continue putting him down for a nap as normal, and if he wants to play quietly in his room instead of nap, that's his choice and it's early to bed that night. It's worked well so far, and we plan to keep quiet time even after he's dropped his nap. That way, if he still needs the occasional nap, he's free to take one.

One other thing...as Tyler's gotten older, he hardly ever seems tired when naptime or bedtime come around. There have been so many days when I put him down for a nap thinking there's no way he'll sleep, but he'll conk out for 2 hrs. I wonder if you might go back to his old naptime, even though he doesn't seem tired?

[Jess-J&E]

Sorry I don't mean to hijack your post but we are going through the same thing here.  It is nice to hear some relaxed attitudes about the days they skip naps.  Ethan isn't even two yet and he has started to do it.  It has only happened a handful of times but I really freak out when it does   He wakes everyday by 5:30 and goes to bed at around 7:30 (I can't get him to go much earlier) so he still needs more than 10 hours a day.  But maybe this is a phase too.

Jessi- We have had the 11:30 nap time for a long time too since he wakes early and now it is starting to change to 12-12:30, just like you.  For me, whenever I give Ethan lunch before his nap it takes him an hour to resettle enough to go to sleep.  The food gives him a super charge or something.  I would love to hear what you do.  I was thinking about doing the 11 lunch and 12:30 naptime but maybe that won't work either.

Melissa- How do you make Tyler understand that nap time is quiet time if he doesn't want to sleep?  Ethan would look at me like I was speaking Japanese or something.  I don't think he would get the concept and he doesn't play in his room alone very well when I want him too.  He just screams and screams, but of course he will play there at other times during the day Did you work on it slowly until he understood more?  Will Tyler stay there for 2 hours?? 

Thanks!
Jess

[Florencia]

I was thinking that maybe lunch was winding them up. What about trying something low in carbohidrates like veggies or fruit or even cereal? staying away from cheese, yoghurt an that kind of treats might help them relax sooner.

If they don't get that nap time = quiet time = crib time alone in their cribs, then a few sessions of walk in walk out would be recommended. That also depends on child's temperament cause they can also find the wi/wo as a peekaboo session since they are reluctanct to go to bed.

Another thing that comes to my mind is a longer wind down. Long as 30 mins, starting waving bye bye to things at the house (we even say night night to the vacumm and blender lately ). I found that i had to "convince" ds that he had to start relaxing by letting him now it was nap time FOR EVERYONE IN THE WORLD LOL... so we spend a good 15 mins bye byeing things, then we tide up his room to prepare it for sleep, he helps me make bottle, put on pj's, etc... The more we associate things with bedtime, the more he's likely to go down without much fuss. Then i give him bottle, sing a few songs, tell him i love him a lot and that i'm tired and need to go to bed myself (oh dear God how i wish this was true LOL). When he had his nap strikes, i would leave the room the same and he'd protest and cry so that's when the wi/wo thing started. Even now somedays i hear him crashing the room, singing, talking for 20 mins and i start to freak out but i leave him be as long as he's not crying. He cries, i do wi/wo... and to my surprise when he's singing super loud the next minute he's out.

Then when you've done all this and they still won't nap...well, there's no much you can do except for being consistant with the timings, routines and methods and hope for the best. You can provide the oportunities for sleep, help them go to sleep but unfortunately, can't make them sleep.

HTH! and i sure hope this is just a week off for the sleep of your lo's!!!!!!!!!!

[tylersmommy]

Jess - I can't remember, is Ethan still in his crib? It might just depend on your LO...Tyler's pretty good at entertaining himself and could seriously chat away in his crib for 2 full hrs. Now that he's in a big boy bed, he'll entertain himself for an hr or so reading books in his room. We've always let him choose and take a quiet toy or 2 to bed with him, like some books or trains, and we've let him bring in however many he wants since moving to the BBB to reinforce the "stay in your room" concept. If he starts hollering to get up or crying before I think it's time, I'll go in and remind him that it's time for night night and leave and do WI/WO until I think naptime should be over. For us, that's an hr, sometimes more if I think he might throw in the towel and fall asleep for a reasonable amount of time. Does that make sense?

[Jessi]

Thanks to both of you for responding!  It's good to know I'm not the only one.  I had thought of going back to normal early nap time, but that just isn't very much awake time in the am.  I may try it though.  I hate to keep changing things up.  DS just spent the weekend at my sister's house, where he doesn't nap and stays up late, so last night getting him to bed was rough and now he's still sleeping at 8:30!  I'm expecting today to be off too now.

Tyler's mommy: how much earlier do you put him to bed on days he doesn't nap?  Does he resist at all?

Jess: Now that I think about it, lunch may be making it worse.  I used to just give him a snack mid-morning, then he'd have more of a "lunch" after his nap.  Maybe I'll try doing that again...

[tylersmommy]

Jessi- I put Tyler to bed 30 min-1 hr early on no nap days. He shows no signs of tiredness, but about 1.5 hrs before his normal bedtime, we often start seeing some out of character behavior. He's often more clingy, whiny, or melts down more easily. We've also found that if we keep his normal bedtime when he hasn't napped, then he wakes at the same time the next day and is often cranky that whole morning. Yuck. He doesn't really resist early bedtime...usually he's so tired from not napping that he conks out pretty quickly.

[Jess-J&E]

thanks Melissa- Ethan isn't really so great at entertaining himself in the crib (yup he is still in his crib). It might be because his room is dark though, even for naps so he can't see to play very well.  I try to put a night light in but he says "off"
We'll keep working on it though.

Jessi- Today I gave Ethan a sort of lunch at 10:30, knowing that he would get the rest after his nap.  He had some ham, grapefruit and milk which filled him up. Then he played until 11:30 and went for a 2 hour!!! nap at 12.  So maybe the food so close to bed actually was winding him up.  He had an hour to work off the energy and then slept well.  We finished with another half lunch of yogurt, juice and goldfish at 2.  So then no snacks until dinner.  What are you going to try?

Jess

[Jessi]

Jess-
  I did roughly the same thing today.  Gave him a small snack around 11, then put him to bed at 12:30.  He did seem tired today, and I'm sure he needed to catch up after the last couple of days at his auntie's.  Anyway, he never cried to come out like he has been doing, but I heard him playing around until about 1:30!  I just figured if he was content in there to play quietly, that was fine with me.  It got quiet and I poked my head in at 3:30 to find EVERY toy he owns pulled out, not to mention all of the clothes in his drawers!    He looked like he fell asleep sitting up and passed out on his giant Elmo.  I took pictures, but don't really know how to put them up.  I woke him up, not wanting to fight him at bedtime.

Who knows?  It could have been the no lunch.  It could have been that he was just exhausted from a couple days of fun and no naps.  We'll see how tomorrow goes.  I'm going to try stick to the snack thing and hope that helps. 

Anyway, keep posting.  I'm curious to see what happens with Ethan.
Jessi