Author Topic: waking up every hour crying (Read 4047 times)

seaflower · « **on:** May 29, 2006, 20:31:44 pm »

Hi,

I've posted before on the other forums regarding DD's routine. She is 10.5mo and used to co-sleep and breastfeed all night long (waking every hour or two).

We moved her to her own room and her own cot a week ago, first days were very hard but now she is settling and when she wakes up only takes about 2-5 minutes sush-ing to get her back to sleep. She still wakes up screaming though every hour or two!!

Any ideas? Although we do have some progress, I am getting a bit discouraged at this point and dying for sleep!

teezee · « **Reply #1 on:** May 29, 2006, 20:38:37 pm »

could you pls post your lo's routine...actually it would be very helpful if you could answer all of the questions posted here:

https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=54625.0

seaflower · « **Reply #2 on:** May 29, 2006, 21:22:31 pm »

Hi, sorry, I should have answered them I guess. I already did in another post and didn't want to repeat them, but then find that after two or three posts the topic changes from breasteeding to nightwaking, or to activity time, so have to post in another place

Here we go:

How old is your child?
10.5 mo

What’s his/her daily routine?
We've been working on a routine last few weeks, so it is kind of like this:
Wake up and breastfeed 7am (anytime 6:30-7:30)
solids 8-8:30am
nap 10am for 45 mins, sometimes 1.5 hour. usually breastfeed before that if I am not at work
solids 12:30-1pm
nap 2-2:30pm for 45 mins, sometimes 1.5 hours
solids 4pm (fruit) and sometimes bf
dinner 6-6:30pm
bath 6:30-7pm
breastfeed and bed 7:30pm

then she wakes up every hour or two.
Used to co-sleep and bf all night long, now feeds around 12am and 4am

What’s nap routine?
two naps, play music and shush, wants me to be there. Used to fall asleep while nursing up to a week ago.

How long are naps?
usually 45 mins, sometimes 1.5 hours

What's bedtime routine? Time?
bath, breastfeed, bed at 7:30pm

Do you bottle or breastfed??
breastfeed

How much? or how long?

If breastfed.. one side or both?? (at each feed)
one

How many wakes per night?
every our or two

What’s your LO like when waking at night? How long is he/she up?
wakes up crying, last few days started falling asleep after 2-3mins of shush an music, but wants me next to her

When you go to him/her is she fussing or crying? Or is it a mantra cry?
crying, ifI go out gets up in the cot and screams the place down!

What have you tried to settle??
back rub, shushing, music

What do you do for A time and how long is it?
play, on her own or with her.

Are there developmental issues such as teething or milestones?
teething

Have you introduced cereal? Why, how much, and how many times a day? (for LO’s under 6 months)

Do they have a prop? If so what is it?
don;t know.

Do they have a lovie?
no

Sorry it is so long! And thanks for reading if you've read so far

teezee · « **Reply #3 on:** May 30, 2006, 03:48:16 am »

first good for you for getting lo on this routine - if a week ago you were nursing to sleep and now you aren't - wow!! that's an accomplishment! good for you and congrats!!!

do remember rome wasn't built in a day and don't get discouraged if other things don't move as quickly..

ok well i would def try extending that A time somewhat - start with 15 min at each A time and see how that goes. if needed or it seems she will do ok with it i would go even further..but just don't let lo get overtired and keep the extra A time really low key.

as far as the length of the naps, i would suggest not letting that am nap go over 45min to an hr. the pm nap 'should' be the longer one and it usually works out better that way anyway in relevence to night wakings.

i think it would be an excellent idea for you to introduce a lovey at this point since lo was sleeping with you for so long ( i did this too... ) she wants you near to have that comfort to go back to sleep. get a nice soft blankie or stuffed animal...something soft and light and sleep with it for a night - get your mommy smells all over it and start to introduce it to your lo. it may take a bit for her to 'catch on' to it, but will be very helpful to you in the end as with the sleep training, when it starts to take effect, this will compliment sleep training as hopefully lo will feel close enough to you b/c of the smell to be able to resettle.

don't be sorry it is long - i asked for the information

and it's all good information b/c it has shed some light for me

if you have anymore questions don't hesitate to ask! hth and good luck! keep us posted

is maybe your lo waking b/c she is not comfortable..pain, temperature of room, gas??? it sounds as that may be a problem. or perhaps is she getting too riled up before bed and becoming overstimulated b/c of it?? it could also be (if you have ruled out the others) that you just need to do some sleep training as lo was in the habit of waking so often and this may take some time, patience and consistancy on your part. if shhing or patting or whatever you are doing is working for you then keep it up! you may want to entertain pu/pd as another option for sleep training (which imo is harder work esp in the middle of the night..once you start you HAVE to be consistant with this, but won't take as long to achieve most times.)

seaflower · « **Reply #4 on:** May 30, 2006, 16:51:58 pm »

Quote from: teezee on May 30, 2006, 03:48:16 am

ok well i would def try extending that A time somewhat - start with 15 min at each A time and see how that goes. if needed or it seems she will do ok with it i would go even further..but just don't let lo get overtired and keep the extra A time really low key.

Which one do you mean? It feels as if she has plenty of A as it is, it is the sleep we are lacking

I'll defenitelly work on the lovey. I tried giving her a doll everytime she goes to bed but she doesn't seem interested. I will try and keep the toy with me for a day or two and then see if she takes to it.

As for why she wakes up crying, I still don't know. She wakes up like that from all naps and during the night. Temperature is different, teething some days but not always, the fact she goes back to sleep so quickly makes me think she is scared or confused when she wakes up. No idea how to help her though.

There is a defenite progress, I was just hoping it will be quicker

Both DH and I are pretty tired and don't know how much longer we can stick to it!

teezee · « **Reply #5 on:** May 30, 2006, 19:04:28 pm »

the pm A time

nap 10am for 45 mins, sometimes 1.5 hour. usually breastfeed before that if I am not at work
solids 12:30-1pm
nap 2-2:30pm for 45 mins, sometimes 1.5 hours

if lo is only sleeping for 45 min in the pm then maybe she isn't tired enough to stay asleep and this should be the longer of the naps. if you have a long am nap it usually just robs the night sleep kwim?

fyi - it took me MUCH longer than a day or two for my lo to really take to the lovey i gave her - just keep persistant about giving it to her..and you may have to find a few different things to try before one will click with her.

hopefully with extending the pm A time before the nap, it will start pushing the day forward so there is a little less A time before bed (hopefully this will help) and if she is by chance becoming overtired in that time it will stop it from happening.

everything does take time unfortunately - but you are doing a wonderful job

just keep consistant and persistant!!

teezee · « **Reply #6 on:** May 30, 2006, 19:05:43 pm »

just wanted to add that when lo's wake up and cry every hr that it usually means imo one of three things

1. pain or discomfort
2. too much sleep (naps)/not tired enough to stay asleep
3. overtired/overstimulated

seaflower · « **Reply #7 on:** June 04, 2006, 20:18:14 pm »

DD still wakes up

I decided to expore the possibilitied one by one, so the first one is her being overtired. i'm going to move her naps earlier (9am instead of 10:30am as she seems ready to sleep then), and try and keep PM nap longer, and get her to bed at 7pm instead of 7:30.

Any other ideas are welcome, we are really exhaused from lack of sleep at this point. Last night for the first night in a year when I slept for FOUR hours uninterrupted (DH looked after her)

teezee · « **Reply #8 on:** June 05, 2006, 14:33:32 pm »

keep me posted on your results - keeping my fingers crossed!

seaflower · « **Reply #9 on:** June 08, 2006, 18:57:58 pm »

Don't know where to post this. I feel on the verge of getting into the car and driving far, far away

She still wakes up, last two days it takes me 40 minutes to put her down for a nap and she only sleeps 30 minutes. In the evening is the same, in fact she is still up now, I just gave up after an hour. Sitting next to me happily smiling and playing with her toy. We do have a routine, she does seem tired, and then she just won't go down. She keeps climbing up in her cot giggling at me. Over and over, and over... Really don't know what to do anymore.

andibig · « **Reply #10 on:** June 08, 2006, 19:14:38 pm »

so had this with dd. trying to put her down to sleep she'd stand up in the cot.put her down.stand up and laugh.put her down.stand up in cot throw lovey out of cot etc etc etc etc. in the end i just had to stand there not looking at her look REEEEallly bored until she finally laid down. v frustrating.

teezee · « **Reply #11 on:** June 08, 2006, 19:21:54 pm »

what happens if you put her down and leave the room immediately. recently my dd has started trying to play this game too and i find if i leave the room right away after the routine and putting her in the crib she may let out a few wails and then she goes to sleep.

maybe you want to get a lovey for your lo and get your scent all over it?..sleep with it for a night...'maybe' that will help some.

do you do 'anything' else for the bedtime routine besides bath bf and bed?

seaflower · « **Reply #12 on:** June 08, 2006, 19:39:26 pm »

Thanks girls, I'm in a pretty bad state today, lack of sleep for the last few weeks (and months) is finally catchign up with me. Sorry for the emotional post earlier. Just got DD to sleep so a bit better

Re evenign routine -
give her dinner,
wash her face,
run her bath and wash her,
moisturise, change her into babygro (at this point she is rubbing her eyes usually),
cuddle her for a breastfeed (she usually tries to climb over me and play, very hard to bf her recently).

Then we go to her room, turn on the music and place her down in her cot. she immediatelly pops up, i put her down, and so on.

If I walk out she starts moaning, I've tried staying out for 15 mins she keeps moaning. Sometimes screams real loud but never lies down. If I sit there ignoring her she usually keeps smiling at me, and eventually starts moaing again, which escalates to a scream. A real spirited baby, very stubborn.

I tried givign her a lovey, one cute doll, she plays with it sometimes, sometimes just ignores it. I slept with it, keep it in her cot all the time... She doesn't have any favourite toy as such to use as a lovey.

Sashas mummy, what did you do at the end to get your lo to sleep?

Edited to add: We don't have any routines for naps. The only one is put he blackout curtain and change her nappy.

seaflower · « **Reply #13 on:** June 08, 2006, 19:41:45 pm »

Sorry, forgot to say the positive thing - she is pretty quick to settle quring the nights these days, last night I only had to place her back down in her cot after she got up crying and she was fast asleep within seconds.

On the negative side, as DH said 'we are in a hostige situation' - one of us sleeps in her room as she wakes up so often!

I'll go and browse the PU/PD forum and see if we are doign something wrong.

andibig · « **Reply #14 on:** June 08, 2006, 19:48:20 pm »

not sure if this will help. once she finally decided to lay down realising mummy was not playing this game anymore!!! i used to just lay a hand on her tummy not say anything until she was settled i'd then leave the room but leave her door open. for some reason leaving the door open seemed to reassure her.eventually after a few days i could just lay her down leave the room leave door open.eventually i could close the door. the first time i did this it did take me over an hour to settle her she wasn't upset just playful but i knew she was tired.
HTH

seaflower · « **Reply #15 on:** June 16, 2006, 21:00:52 pm »

Ok, guys, I don't really know where to go from here.

DD goes to sleep much easier, and usually stays asleep until around 12am (may stirr in once or twice occasionally if she gets stuck in the corner of her cot) but then after 12am still keeps waking up every hour or two. Usually the waking at 3am she is very hard to settle, around 15-20mins. Then she gets up at 5am for the day! (we do have blackout curtain, used to help but not anymore).

Feel as if we should tweak the technique but don't know how?

teezee · « **Reply #16 on:** June 17, 2006, 01:32:21 am »

have you changed the routine at all since you last posted it? if so, pls post the new routine and we will take a look for you

did you have any progress at all?

seaflower · « **Reply #17 on:** June 17, 2006, 06:03:13 am »

We have changed it a little bit, mainly getting her to bed early and her waking up at 5am $:-\$

Wake up 5 - 5:30am
breastfeed 6am (she usually moans until then and seems tired but can't get her to sleep)
solids 8-8:30am
nap 9:30-10am for 45 mins, sometimes 1.5 hour.

solids 12:30pm
nap 1:30-2pm for usually an hour (usually a bf beforehand)
solids 4pm (fruit)

dinner 6pm
bath 6:20pm
breastfeed and bed 6:30pm.

She is asleep by 6:45-7pm. Stays asleep until around 12am and then wakes up in the small hours regularily every hour or so. If I am in the room with her and catch her while she is sturring, and say shhhhhh she settles quick enough, if I leave her for few minutes she starts to cry and takes ages to settle her afterwards. Don't think it is discomfort at this stage, as it is repeating every night.

The improvement is that she sleeps 7pm-12am, which I am delighted with, but we are still exhausted from all the waking afterwards.

teezee · « **Reply #18 on:** June 18, 2006, 04:05:28 am »

you may want to try extending A times a bit...esp that pm A time before the second nap, and that will help make sure lo isn't getting overtired right before bed.

also the way your naps are set up (mind you it works that way for me) don't always work for all lo's. usually the shorter nap 'needs' to be in the am and the longer one in the pm..the reason for this is so lo isn't making up for lost sleep at night with a long morning nap..a catnap should be sufficient at this age - if they had a good night's sleep should be well rested enough with that. look at the am nap as an extension of night sleep. i would try limiting that nap and letting lo have a longer pm nap - in essence try 'switching' them around - hopefully that will help solve the issue. good luck hun! hth!

oh and once she starts sleeping til a 'normal' hr in the morning, i would think she could handle a bit more than 3 hrs at this age - all lo's are different but if you are still having some issues i would try extending this a bit too.

seaflower · « **Reply #19 on:** June 18, 2006, 11:12:21 am »

Hi teezee!

Quote from: teezee on June 18, 2006, 04:05:28 am

you may want to try extending A times a bit...esp that pm A time before the second nap, and that will help make sure lo isn't getting overtired right before bed.

she starts rubbing her eyes much earlier so was afraid to keep her up too long in case she is overtired. Also, if I get her to nap at 3pm for 1.5 hours won't thaht be too close to bed time? I'll try it anyway, can't get ayny worse

Quote from: teezee on June 18, 2006, 04:05:28 am

oh and once she starts sleeping til a 'normal' hr in the morning, i would think she could handle a bit more than 3 hrs at this age - all lo's are different but if you are still having some issues i would try extending this a bit too.

Which three hours is that? The morning A time?

Thanks for all suggestions, will try extending her pm nap and cut down on the am one.

teezee · « **Reply #20 on:** June 19, 2006, 01:25:26 am »

if you do cut down that am nap some then her A time won't take her as late in the pm kwim? and if it is only a couple hrs til bedtime i wouldn't worry about it too much myself, if you find it is having an effect on lo not wanting or being ready to go to sleep extend her bedtime to 7:30 if need be and see if that helps.

i do know that around 11 months i had horrible nap issues with my lo (and early wakings

) who has always been a great napper...i am not 'suggesting' you do it..but i do know some days i opted for 1 nap - 1 long nap and put her to bed early so she didn't get overtired. if all else fails you may want to try it if you feel confident in doing so. now on the odd occasion dd will take 1 nap - but always two - a longer one and a catnap.

Quote from: seaflower on June 17, 2006, 06:03:13 am

nap 9:30-10am for 45 mins, sometimes 1.5 hour.

solids 12:30pm
nap 1:30-2pm for usually an hour (usually a bf beforehand)

the A time after the first nap...if lo is sleeping from 10-11:30 (as is now) and is going down for the next nap at 1:30 then there is only two hrs of A time in there..i think that could be extending as A times as the day goes on should/usually do get longer by 15 to 1/2 hr each A time.

seaflower · « **Reply #21 on:** June 19, 2006, 06:42:43 am »

Thanks, TeeZee, I'll give it a go. I was a bit reluctant to mess with her schedule as it took us long time to get onto a routine and now it seems as if I am tweaking it every second day

Hardly know what her 'routine' is anymore, iykwim. We are just having a bit of a rough time at the moment and finidng it hard to cope, she has one of us hostage in her room for the second half of the night.

I'll have a look at the other posts and routines of babies similar age, and will try and stick to a new routine for a week, see if it makes a difference. Really appreciate all your input, will print it for DH to read

seaflower · « **Reply #22 on:** June 19, 2006, 06:50:49 am »

How is this for a plan?

Wake up 6am (she slept later lat few morning so hope it lasts)
breastfeed 6:30am
solids 8-8:30am
nap 10am (will try to keep it short 45mins)

solids 12:30pm
nap 2:30pm (will try to keep it long, 1.5h)
snack 4pm (fruit)

dinner 6pm
bath 6:20pm
breastfeed and bed 6:30pm.

teezee · « **Reply #23 on:** June 19, 2006, 14:53:24 pm »

if lo is sleeping later than perhaps everything you have done thus far is taking effect? maybe you don't have to do anything as of yet...i would give it a couple more days and see how it goes..unless that isn't including the other night wakings?!..you may still want to switch the naps around to be preventitive though.

are you and your dh both doing the same thing at the night wakings? keeping lo in the crib with a hand on her??

i do think the routine you posted looks pretty damn good

how many bfs is your lo taking a day now? i am still giving my lo 3 (not to say that is right..) but when did you cut out the other bf? could maybe your lo still need it?

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Author Topic: waking up every hour crying (Read 4047 times)

andibig

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