Chiara is 9 months old and is clearly a "spirited" child, which we love.
But, I find that everyone's advice on how to get her to stop the night feeds and gain more weight doesn't seem to apply.
She had jandice and weight loss early on, coinciding with my post-natal high blood pressure. I went to a bf clinic and they found that she was eating enough at feeds, which were always brief.
I didn't know how long she should be sleeping and followed the "feed on demand" advice. Since the bp issue exhausted me and I was bfing, AND she outgrew her bassinet early on, she ended up sleeping with us. Then we moved to a bigger place, set her crib and room up, but she was teething and I followed the advice of not trying to enforce the new crib all the time since she was in a transition.
My mommy group talked about the BW book and I started reading it and using some of it's methods on April 14 - just before her 8 month mark. I quickly got her used to having 2 1.5 hr naps and 3 solid food meals per day and no more night bf. Then we managed to move her into her crib for naps and bedtimes. BUT, some of the pu/pd sessions looked like the scene from the Helen Keller story where Ann Bancroft is teaching Patty Duke to stop acting like an animal. I mean, for 20 minutes solid we'd go back down, and down and down - and she was getting madder and madder. I kept reminding myself "this is not a battle of wills. I'm teaching her to sleep". I kept calm and expected that it would last only a week, and that the night wakings would soon end.
The naps got easier, but not always. I tried to keep them at consistent times, as well as mealtimes. But, some days she wouldn't eat and her formula intake got better for a while, then fell off again. She's drpped from the 25th to 10th percentile for weightover the last 4 months, although her height is 75th. She's learned to crawl, cruise, climb the stairs;has pushed her 4th tooth through; her bowel movements sometimes come after breakfast, sometimes not and tend to be firm.
I've changed my own activity level to accommodate this readjustment period for her - maybe 2 outside activities per week. I'm trying so hard to
get her on a good routine while being PC.
But evertime I think I've got it and do the same thing the next day - SHE changes and it doesn't work the 2nd, 3rd, or 4th days.
For example, she started spitting up where she never had before, but was taking more formula and food. Then 3 days ago she was awake for 4 hours during the night, slept in, ate like a pig for breakfast, had a great morning nap, slept only briefly in the car ride after errands, wouldn't go back down for the rest of her nap in her crib, ate a great lunch and dinner, then didn't settle well. The next day she did the same thing, skipped her afternoon nap (which maybe normal in a 9 month old?) ate well all day and went down for the night 2 hours earlier than normal (8:30) (yes I know that's what time she's supposed to go down, but we have been moving it slowly to earlier bedtimes). She slept for a blissful 4hours, I fed her 4 oz, then she slept for another 4 hours! She woke again, I gave her another 4oz and she slept unitl her usual waking time at 7. So, was the trick to let her skip her afternoon nap, put her to bed earlier, and give her a couple of bottles at night since she seems to be hungry? She does self soothe and go back to sleep early on in her naps and bedtime.
Not supposed to feed at night, but every weigh in is a disappointment, so if she's hungry, don't I need to feed her? The book suggests increasing her daytime calories, but she stops eating and I can't force her to eat anymore. She's underweight (so am I), so I don't know how the common advice plays into that and it was the nurse at the last weigh in that told me to give her a bottle in the middle of the night. She eats her breakfast fine, so it's not affecting her daily appetite, it seems.
If something were to work for more than a day at a time, I could be guided by that. But I have been at this for a month and a half. I have had some success, but then she mixes things up on me again. Today she woke early, ate poorly and seemed tired at breakfast and didn't want much formual after,so I took the hint and put her down for a nap. She slept only 30 minutes (usually 1.5), woke happy as a clam (she's always happy!) and still wasn't hungry. We gave her the usual night bottles last night (2am and 5am) plus another at 7am to try to get her back to sleep for a bit. She never has a short morning nap - it's one thing I can count on.
I read about acid reflux in the book, and wonder if that's an answer. She's always been a bad burper, farting and hiccuping alot (even in utero) and her dad has it too. I keep her up for at least an hour after feedings and she has a small pillow under her sheet. We have a Dr appt this week to see if they think that could be it.
I really am trying to be consistent, and even when she misses one of her feeds or naps, I keep with the program, but I can't see not feeding her at night when she's not gaining weight and the controlled crying method has never been something I want to try since she's the type who doesn't "cry herself to better" - she just gets more and more worked up (Spirited, remember?)
We don't know what else to do.
