How do you keep a 2 year old in their bed?

[minimum]

I am at my wits end,  About 7 weeks ago ds started in his big bed because he could climb out of his cot, even with his sleeping bag on.  However, almost every night since he has spent between 1/2 and 2 1/2 hours getting out of his bed, fiddling with whatever he can in his room and sometimes coming out of his room.  My husband & I have now spent hours sitting upstairs putting him back to bed.  Can I make ds stay in bed?  Or should I just focus on stopping him coming out of his room?  If so, how can we do that?  I tried using a door stop this evening to stop him opening his door and that made him hysterical.  Any suggestions?

[Florencia]

When is he climbing out of bed? at bedtime or after a solid period of sleep?

If it is right at bedtime you can try placing a mattress next to the bed where you will "go to sleep" with him, to reassure him you're there, it's ok and it's night time. Everytime he tries to climb down, you redirect him and reassure him till eventually he settles and goes to sleep and you can leave the room then. Gradually, as he puts less resistance you can start moving the mattress next to the door till you manage to be out of the room.

If he's waking after a period of sleep and doing so you just redirect him to his bed every single time. The first one you explain shortly it's night time we need to rest in our own beds, I love you, see you tomorrow. For the following, you just redirect him kindly, without words or other interaction. This might take a few exhausting hours but he will eventually get that there's no point in climbing out, since he's not getting anything from you. Even if you show upsseting, he might get that he's getting a reaction out of you and by so, being encouraged to keep on going, so you just calmly direct him again and again being really BORING.

HTH! hang in there!

[Petunia]

I tried using a door stop this evening to stop him opening his door and that made him hysterical.  Any suggestions?

Guess you found out the hard way that that is not a good idea  .  It would make him hysterical to all of a sudden be 'locked in'.  He doesn't understand what you're trying to do.

Florencia's advice is good.  You need to look at the situation differently.  He doesn't know he is supposed to stay in bed when it's so easy to get out of bed.  This is a new bed for him.  And you've let him play with stuff when he gets out of bed so he thinks that it's ok to do this now.

Be prepared to be in training mode for the next several weeks to several months.  When you put him down for bed in the evening you are not done.  You need to be readily available to intervene as soon as he gets out of bed.  You can do this by lying down next to him like Florencia advised or by staying right by his door so you know when he's gotten up.  Exacting consistency will help him to learn the new routine and expectations much better.

It is extremely common for a child this young to do exactly what your son has done.  And it is common for it to take weeks to months of consistently redirecting a child this age before they stop getting up out of bed.

You may want to have a little talk about how bedtime is going to be different now.  Just explain what will take place and in what order and that he is not to get out of bed.  Then plan ahead about what you will say every time you put him back to bed.

Hopefully, he'll pick it up sooner rather than later so you can have your evenings back.