Dont know what else to do

[Bobby brown]

My DS is now 9 months old and never been a great sleeper. About 8 weeks ago he started having longer naps in the afternoon rather that his 35 Min's. which in turn help with the night time sleep.

Charlie used to wake every 2 - 2.5 hrs all through the night and then wake at 5.30 most mornings - This was extremely hard for me but I learnt to live with it. Things have now changed for him. He still goes to bed between 6.30pm - 7.00pm and will genrally sleep till about 1.30am - 2.00am. The problem now is when he wakes he cant put himself  back to sleep, so for for 2.5 hrs it a constant fight to find a way to help him, but nothing works - PU/PD never worked for us when he was younger and still doesn't now and wake to sleep just wakes him sooner.
Eventually he crys himself to sleep which totally breaks my heart and he gets so frustrated as all he wants is to sleep.  Then 5.30am comes round and he wants to get up.

His routine

Wakes around 5.30 - 6.00am
Breakfast around 6.30 - 7.00am
Activity
Back to bed for a 45. min - 1 hr nap at 8.00am
(this is also a struggle for him too as he normally ends up moaning himself to sleep- which takes around half hour)
Wakes around 9.30

10.00am - Small snack to get him through till lunch time
Activity

12.00 pm Lunch

12.30pm Sleep - Last between 1.5 - 2 hrs (Once again struggles for half an hour to drop off)

Wakes between 2.00pm - 2.30pm
Activity

3.00pm Small snack

5.00 - Tea

6.00 - 6.30pm Bath time with daddy

6.30 - 6.45pm Bottle - then bed (Which ends up being a cry/ moan to sleep)


The Naps and Bedtime and hard for him to go to sleep easily, but I don't pick him up I just walk in every now and then and reassure him it okay and that it sleep time for him. It is only if he gets himself in a uncontrollable cry that I comfort him and then put him back down when he has calmed down - or I rub his back which seems to calm him too. The one thing I have noticed is if I stay in the room he does stay calm, but unfortunally still cant get off.

I hate to see him like this as it obvious that he wants to go sleep but cant settle himself - Its always the night that worst as it takes around 2.5 hrs before he exhausts himself.

Can anyone help as I don't know what I am doing wrong - Its been 9 months of sleep deprivation for me and some times I feel like a woman on the edge.

[teezee]

maybe you should let lo stay up a bit longer in the morning before the nap?! it seems he isn't quite ready to go to bed from what you have said and this would also help with the early waking imo. this would also help push the day forward some so that lo doesn't get overtired by bedtime. hth.

[Bobby brown]

Yes in theory I agree but by 2 hrs of being awake he is rubbing his eyes so much and then starts to whimper which makes me think he is ready for a nap.

Okay I will try though.

[teezee]

he is 'used' to going to sleep at that time so is conditioned to be tired at that time and starts giving sleep cues kwim? keep lo up 15 min or so every few days by having very very low key A time in the extra time he will be up and it should work.

[Bobby brown]

Thanks

I will put into action today

[teezee]

let me know how you guys are getting along

good luck!

[Bobby brown]

HI,

This is my update since last posting.

Have now stretched DS first activity time to about 3hrs and he is generally so tired by then that the manta crying only lasts about 10 min, then he crashes out.

Unfortunately that has not help with the 5 - 5.30am waking up OR the 1.5 - 2hrs that he stays awake from 2.00am

Anyone got anything else I could try.

[teezee]

are things still the same?

have you tried tweaking a bit more here or there to see if you can find something better to fit your lo?

[Bobby brown]

Hi,

Hope your feeling refreshed after your break.

Although the1/2 crying before nap has improved 100%.

I am seeing a slight improvement in the 1.5 hrs of being awake from 2.30am as over the last couple of weeks as it hasn't happened everynight (I have my fingers crossed that it will continue to improve). Although he is still waking around this time he is learning to fall back to sleep, but I do feel that this is because we have had a heat wave in England over the last couple of weeks and I have learnt not to rush in to quick - I generally know that if he is still moaning for me after 5Min's he will be awake for the 1.5 - 2 hrs.

Finally the 5.00am wake up - Unfortunately there is no improvement - This is the one I find hardest for me because it doesn't matter if he  does stay awake for the 1.5hrs in the middle of the night he always wakes between 5.00am to 5.15am - I think I find it so hard because it takes me about an hour to fall back to sleep and just as I do he wants to get up.

I don't think that its his teeth as his first tooth came when he was 5 months old and since that time he has had another 6 which I didn't know were coming as non of them have seemed to bother him - He is generally a really happy baby except on odd days but i think its all to do with his sleep.

[teezee]

ok just so i can get the full picture again..if your routine has changed would you be able to re-post it for us?

[Bobby brown]

Ok. DS Charlie is 10 months old in a weeks time.

His day starts between 5.00am - 5.30am   

Has breakfast at 6.30am (Solid) 

Activity till 8.00 - 8.30 am (depending on what time he got up)

Sleeps any where between 45mins - 2 hrs (this depends on what sort of night we had)

10.30am - Small snack to see him through till lunch time

12.00pm - 12.30pm - Lunch (Solid)

1.30pm - 2.00pm - Sleep time - Last between 45min to 1.5hrs

4.00pm - 4.30pm Tea (Solid)

6.00pm - 6.20pm - Bath with daddy

6.30 - 6.45 Bottle then immediately to bed.

Wakes around 12am but can normally put him self back to sleep after lots of moaning - occasionally needs my help with a back rub

2.00 - 2.30am - THIS IS THE 1.5hrs AWAKE PERIOD WHICH TOTALLY CONFUSES ME AS TO WHY 

Then awake by 5.00 - 5.30am   

Your help is very much appreciated, I am willing to try any suggestions as Charlie has never slept through the night and sometimes I feel like I am banging my head against a brick wall.

[Bobby brown]

Ok. DS Charlie is 10 months old in a weeks time.

His day starts between 5.00am - 5.30am   

Has breakfast at 6.30am (Solid) 

Activity till 8.00 - 8.30 am (depending on what time he got up)

Sleeps any where between 45mins - 2 hrs (this depends on what sort of night we had)

10.30am - Small snack to see him through till lunch time

12.00pm - 12.30pm - Lunch (Solid)

1.30pm - 2.00pm - Sleep time - Last between 45min to 1.5hrs

4.00pm - 4.30pm Tea (Solid)

6.00pm - 6.20pm - Bath with daddy

6.30 - 6.45 Bottle then immediately to bed.

Wakes around 12am but can normally put him self back to sleep after lots of moaning - occasionally needs my help with a back rub

2.00 - 2.30am - THIS IS THE 1.5hrs AWAKE PERIOD WHICH TOTALLY CONFUSES ME AS TO WHY  

Then awake by 5.00 - 5.30am  

Your help is very much appreciated, I am willing to try any suggestions as Charlie has never slept through the night and sometimes I feel like I am banging my head against a brick wall.

[teezee]

alright - well i would def limit that first nap...if it is too long then lo will continue the early waking cycle as he keeps making up for the lost night sleep with this nap. look at that nap as an extension of night sleep - if well rested lo should only need a short nap at this time to reenergize kwim? and as tracy says - start as you mean to go - so limit that nap and let lo have a longer pm nap which will also help if lo is getting overtired before bed (his A time 'may' be too long before bed). if you notice in the last A time that lo is getting to the point of overtired def put lo to bed earlier.

how many bottles/day is your lo getting now?

now for that middle of the night waking how are you handling it to get him back to sleep?? have you tried wake to sleep for that waking..or even if you want to try for the early morning waking as long as these wakings are relatively the same time each night it might be worth a shot. def for the middle of the night waking though.

sorry i am not more help