19 month old not going to bed like before..PLEASE read my post and help!!

[mommy2two]

My 19.5 month old dd used to go to bed very easily. I would just rock her for about 20 minutes, lay her in the crib and she would go to sleep. Well about a two months ago, she started NOT falling to sleep for at least 30-60 minutes after I put her in her crib. I did not mind too much because she was not crying and was just talking to herself and moving around her crib. Well, for about the past few weeks or so, in addition to not falling asleep for about an hour, she crys several times during that hour to the point where I go in and try to resettle her. Her day looks like this:

7-7:30 am- wake
11am- lunch
12-2/2:30 pm- nap (no problems with nap time at all)
2:30/3 pm- snack
5 pm- dinner
6pm- bath- then play/books, etc until bedtime
7-7:15 pm- Start rocking to wind her down and after about 20 min put in crib awake

MY QUESTIONS
1. Is it normal for her to take so long to go to sleep?
2. Why is she suddenly fussing/crying rather then getting herself to sleep like she used to?
3. WHAT SHOULD I DO???

Thanks!!

[imsmum]

First off this seems to be a very tough age and just when you think things have all settled down after the one nap transition--then, bam! 

I think many lo's around this age take a slightly longer time to settle.  Like yours, my dd used to go off in 20 mins to 1/2 hour but now she can chatter away in her crib for 30 to 45 minutes, occasionally longer so I think that's pretty normal for this age 

One thing that seems with many lo's around this age is the overall sleep time shortens slightly, with some lo's their naps start getting erratic with others the night sleep gets shorter so your lo may be experiencing that.  another thing that seems to happen is that their day starts to extend from 12/13  hours  closer to 13/14 hours.  When that happens you may have to move the nap later by half an hour.  I know it sounds counter intuitive but it sounds like the crying and night waking may be related to overtiredness at bedtime so if you push the nap back a bit then they actually go down a bit quicker and don't wake in the night.  Looking at your schedule there is only 4.5 to 5 hours before nap and around 6 hours after.  If you look at the sticky "what does your toddler's day olok like" you'll see that most have a longer awake period before their nap then after --usually about 5.5 -6 before and 5 or so after. Usually they are better able to handle longer awake times before nap because they ar better rested from their night sleep.  So you may want to try pushing the nap back in 15 minute increments to see if that helps. Alternatively you may want to try a slightly earlier bedtime to beat the overtiredness at bedtime--whatever change in your schedule that is easiest for your family.   

Before messing around with the schedule though you might want to rule out other things like illness or teething.  Ear infections can be a big culprit of night time discomfort since the ear pressure changes lying down and it becomes more painful.  Also there may be some teeth on the move.  You may want to try some pain meds before bedtime to see if that helps, or take your lo to the ped to rule out any ear or other infection.

finally this may just be a blip, there seems to be a lot of variability in sleep around this time so it may correct itself.  Good luck!

[Florencia]

In adition to the great advice provided by imsmum I think that maybe the rocking has become a prop for your dd so you might want to try to star teaching her another way to go to sleep where she won't need so much intervention for you.

I think it's ok for her to try wi/wo (the procedure is described thoroughly in the Faq's section, in the post of Teaching Independent Sleep). If you try it consistantly for a week or so, she might still take her time to go to sleep but at least she won't need your presence for long periods and I think that will solve the problem for you.

As they get older, they are more aware of what they can make (crying, being fussy) to get mommy's cuddles. And this might cause some stress cause mommy needs her rest too. So it's ok to teach her a different way to do things.

As for schedule, I don't see a problem with hers, perhaps just as imsmum already said, pushing her nap a bit later so she'll get to bedtime more rested.

Let us know if there's anything else we can add or clarify. Good luck!