What do I do?? (would love response ASAP)

[Sabine]

My recently turned 1 year old is fussing with mealtimes for the last 2 weeks.  It is a battle to get him to sit in his high chair and eat.  I have started to hate mealtimes....I would think you would be hungry to eat.  I have run out of things to try, I have tried finger foods mixed with meals.  I make all my own and vary it up but he doesn't like that either.  He wants to move all the time so I think he hates being confined....after all he will only take his bottle watching Einstein.

I don't know what else to do and to top things off he has been waking at 5 am  crying now for the last 2 weeks.  Is it teeth?  Is he hungry??  I know I should do solids first but getting up at 5 to do this is hard b/c I need to sleep b/c of work.  Is he getting too much fluids....he loves water and milk. He'll take about 20-24 oz milk and about 5-8oz water every day--no juice. Here is his schedule but solids are hit and miss:

Wake 5-530 am bottle 8oz
730-8 breakfast apple pieces and toast and banana pieces--i try to spoon in some fruit and cereal, 2-3oz water sippy
900 nap
1130 lunch (pasta, veg, meat and yoghourt) will now eat maybe 3 tablespoons total and refuse--sips water
130 bottle
200 nap
530 supper same as lunch
730 bottle and bed asleep by 8

Any suggestions before I lose my mind??

Sabine

[Wife and Mummy.]

ok hi not sure if i will be much help but ill try.my dd2 is still like that now she likes to run off all the time,does he feed himself?have you tried given him different stuff at dinner rather than the same as lunch?how long does he nap for?it could be his teeth.just stay with it it will get better i prmise.have you only  1 child?

[Ennypen]

Hi there Sabine...

My DS is a couple of weeks younger than your son - he will turn one on July 18th.

Meatimes here too can be a challenge as William also hates to be confined in his chair. We also have to make sure that all TV etc is off so that he will concentrate on us as we feed him and sometimes have to turn things into a game - another thing I find works is if I give Wiliam a spoon too and let him try to help me.
Its also been so hot here that he hasn't eaten as much as he was as he just isn't feeling like eating. As long as he is drinking I don't panic too much - he will eat when he feels hungry. Teething also puts him off lumpier foods and I notice that he resists foods when his gums are sore due to teething and I find a bit of teething gel about 10 mins before eating works on days when I know he is teething.

Here is William's routine for you to look at how we do it here.. I'm not saying its right mind you - but its working for us...

6.30am bottle of milk 8oz nappy change
He then plays in his cot as I get ready for work.
7.30am - gets up from cot and gets dressed
9.30am - breakfast - weetabix cereal made up with about 8oz milk. He adores this!
He then plays or goes out for a walk etc...
10.30am - Nap - approx 2 hours
12.30pm - gets up - nappy change etc
1.30pm - lunch - vegetables and meat meal of various variety, fruit for pudding either pureed or pieces
again playing etc
4pm - nap - about an hour
5pm gets up
5.30pm - tea - small vegetables/meat meal , finger food e.g. cheese spread sandwich and fromage frais/yoghurt.
Watches TV for approx 30mins while tea goes down!
6.30pm Daddy comes home so plays with Daddy
6.45pm bath
7pm bottle of milk 9oz - bedtime.

Looking at your info your LO does seem to be drinking a lot of milk - its good to drink but maybe it is taking the edge of his apetite for his food. Could you try to decrease the amount you offer a little and see if it makes any difference to his eating. Also have a look to see if this makes any impact on the time he wakes up. Will wakes at about 6am but sits and chats to himself as he's an angel baby and is always cheerful in the morning bless him.

Sorry I can't be more helpful and tell you what to do to fix your problems that you are experiencing.. I've always been a bit laid back with Will and if one day he decides not to eat much, or even for a couple of days Im ok about it.. as long as he drinks.. As you say its a bit hit and miss sometimes and you need to persevere and tweak things around to see what works for your LO.

Try not to panic. As long as he is growing and is healthy and hydrated he is fine.. if you are really worried see your health visitor or doctor I am sure they will be abe to check him over and give you some advice xxx

Helen xx

[Sabine]

Hi and thanks for the replies...

Helen- it looks like your lo gets 25oz milk per day...I guess my lo isn't too far off (gets b/w 20-24oz).  I don't know what would be normal.  I thought that amount was fine.  He may be teething but I'm not sure.  Maybe after his am bottle he is too full to eat at the 2 hour mark after and perhaps I should wait 3hrs b/w bottle and brekkie like you do???

Should I cut out his lunch bottle?? He will only max take 2oz with a sippy??  If he isn't eating at least he'll be getting something by way of milk. 

What are your thoughts??

Sabine

[workingmum]

Hi Sabine,

 I have had very similar probs with DS (now 16mos) and have had a lot of advice from child health nurses and a paediatrician. This has helped us a lot and while we still have a way to go we have made heaps of progress. Jack is eating more every day including foods he's been refusing for months.

I think the biggest thing we were doing wrong was giving him too much milk. I also felt that at least if he was eating nothing else than he was at least getting that. But the problem was that he wasn't going to eat more while filling up on milk. I was advised to cut his milk down to 3 times a day, with (pref after food) the main meals. Each time he gets between 150 and 250 mls (approx 5 to 8.5 ozs). He has water at other times during the day. The calcium requirement is 3 serves, 1 serve being 1 cup (250 mls or 8.5ozs). But this includes the calcium from other foods such as yoghurt, custard and cheese.

Another really bad thing was trying to persist with getting him to eat when he didn't want to. This meant he didn't enjoy mealtimes and wouldn't experiment with the food on this own. When we relaxed about him playing with food and not eating or just downright refusing, it changed his attitude too. Now, if he eats he gets praised and if he doesn't we just let it go. Even if he plays with it or spits it out it is showing interest so instead of getting frustrated we chill about it. However, if he doesn't eat what he's given the first time he doesn't get offered anything else. I have been assured that kids won't starve themselves. If they are hungry enough they will eat. If they don't eat a thing just get them out of the high chair and wait until the next meal. This was very hard for me but as I say we have had amazing results so I now think it's good advice.

We were also advised to give him small amounts of vitamin supplements (specially for toddlers). This means that until he is eating better he is getting more vitamins and interestingly it also stimulates appetite. This does seem to have worked with Jack who, as I say, is eating more than I would have ever thought possible.

I hope some of this helps, and I wish you lots of luck. It takes a lot of patience but I'm sure you'll get there in the end. In the meantime, relax!!

Melanie.

[Ennypen]

Hiya Sabine..
Yes Will does get about 25 ounces of milk offered to him but actually only drinks about 18-20 of those ounces each day as these days it varies how much he fancies lol... He is also a huge little boy.. he weights 29lbs now so he will need sighty more to keep him going that your average 1 yr old - so maybe your LO is having a bit much milk for her weight etc and it is taking the edge off her apetite. As I said before try cutting it down a bit and see if there is any impact.

I totally agree with everything Melanie has said and I think that her experience and words could be realy useful to you in helping to get your LO to eat more solids. She says pretty much what I said.. if you don't stress about it your LO won't be worried about food and will have a go. They won't starve themselves..

Take care and relax  - mealtimes will soon be fun and your LO will have food everywhere as wel as in her mouth!

Helen xx

[mari]

I think that I was giving our little one too much milk and she was off her food but beware of cutting a whole bottle, maybe reduce her milk at every bottle as I found cutting a whole bottle in one go disrupted her sleep (if it could get any worse!)  Have you tried just giving a fork and letting them get on with it, I know that they are young but they will enjoy having a go, just cut up rather than mash.  Also, I think that we are all suffering from this hot weather, I am a little off my food in the day time so I just stuff junk food at 9pm!!!!!

[andibig]

hi sabine
wanted to say i agree with pp posts try not to worry (easy for us to say). when DD is teething it can really affect her appetite so i tend to go with softer foods. your routine looks similar to mine (although i don't get her up till 6). she is still on 3 btls a day but never normally takes more than 5-6oz from them. is doesn't affect her appetite for solids (she doesn't have snacks in between meals just water).

DD feeds herself (completely refuses to be spoon fed now as shes started to spoon feed herself-yippee ). ok she makes a mess etc but finds it far more intresting than sitting there with me trying to feed her!!! she'll even eat spaghetti with her fingers!!!

IMO i would start to cut down the amts in the btl rather than cut them out completely and see if that makes a difference.

hth

[Sabine]

Just an update..

I have tried to be more relaxed about the whole eating thing.  Some days he is definitely a better eater than others but I don't struggle anymore.

For breakfast I let him self feed and he is usually eating 1/2 waffle or toast, 1/2 banana, few slices apple, yoghurt or cottage cheese with fruit and some Nutrios with about 3 oz water

For lunch I let him feed himself toast/fruit.  Yesterday he ate chicken and I spooned him some veg/pasta.  He ate his yoghurt and applesauce for dessert with 3 oz water.

Snack, homemade trailmix for baby with raisins, pretzels and cheerios.

Supper beef barley soup and fruit.

If he isn't hungry I don't force things and just make up by offering more snacks.  He is still having his am and supper bottle 8oz each but has cut back his midday one to 5-6oz. 

I think I will keep up with this routine for now.

Thanks for all your advice.

Sabine

[mari]

Sound like you are doing great, looks like a very well balanced diet to me!
I think that you are best not to stress out about food as it can make them resent eating and it becomes a chore.  And food is such a wonderful thing and eating such a lovely enjoyable experience that should be relished!  (As you can imagine, I don't get much chance to sit and relish my food that often, I feel the same about sleeping and dreaming and I don't get much of that either!) 
Well done.

[MamaC]

Funny, my ds went through the same thing right around his birthday as well.  I think his issue was the shiny new molar that popped through, though!  I'm glad to read, Sabine, that your lo is doing better.

[workingmum]

Hi Sabine,

That sounds great. Well done!

Melanie