HELP! Just had 12 mos dr. appt. so confused!!!!!

[bicah]

So my son just had his 12 month doctors appointment the other day. I left feeling so confused! I am not sure if what he told me was just for my son because he is a big boy or all one year olds. He said to give him just milk now, no formula. Get rid of the bottles all at once. Also, no more pureed baby food. WHAT?? All that at once? Is this how everyone does it? I am so confused by this! I cant imagine not giving him a bottle? That is how we relax before naps and bedtime(none in the crib, he just has a bottle, rock a little and talk then i put him in)?? So, I have a few questions if anyone can help me with this.

First, Can I put the milk in bottles and then gradually take them away? He only has 3 so I figured I can do one a week or every other week to make the transition easier. He does drink water out of a sippy, but I have tried milk and he doesnt drink much. I am just afraid he wont get enough to drink.

Second, if I take the jar food away what am I supposed to feed him? He does get our food, yet we have to feed him with a fork or else he will not eat. The dr. said that if he is hungry enough he will get it in his mouth himself. My son will feed himself the Gerber puffs, thats it. Everything else, he just pokes and mashes. Nothing in his mouth. Should I put some on his high chair so he can 'play' with it and feed him the rest?

So I feel like if I make these two changes, cold turkey like the doctor said, I will be neglecting my baby and he will be malnourished. Can anyone give me any guidance with this? I appreciate it! Thanks

[ella&jack'smum]

Your doctor's advice sounds harsh to me, although coming with the best of intentions. It is true that most people advise that your child should not be using teats after 12 mos, but there are many women on this site whose children do. I switched mine at around 12 mos from a bottle with a teat to a bottle with a toddler/sippy cup style spout. It still looked like the same bottle - might make the transition a bit easier? Or if he doesn't like a sippy cup maybe try him with no top on at all and you holding the cup?

If you are using formula at the moment I think you can switch to cows milk one of two ways - just do it straight away, or if you feel it will be a problem then you could mix formula and cow's milk together in the same bottle, and gradually down the formula and up the milk until they adjust. I used a different approach for each of my kids based on what I knew about their ability to adapt. And don't worry if it takes a few weeks to get there - there is no HARM in your child having formula after 12 mos, it's just that 12 mos is the first time they are able to drink cow's milk.

Many children can't self feed at 1 year using a spoon etc, so don't even begin to stress about that one!!! Just go at the pace of your child - they should be doing finger foods themselves, but feeding them yourself at this point is no problem at all. Encourage them to use a spoon too, alongside you.

As for ditching the jars, again I think this is a guidline, although they do sell toddler meals in jars!!!!! Just try and up the lumps and consistency and get rid of the really sloppy stuff. Some kids eat exactly the same as their parents at this age, some don't. Again I'd say just go with the flow.

I think your doctor was maybe just a bit forceful with his advice - it's all along the right lines, but you don't need to do everything at once, and go with the pace that your child sets, rather than some 'milestone' age you dr feels you are at.

Hope this helps - let us know how you get on.

[Diegos Mama]

bicah,

I think you know just what to do.  Transitioning gradually is a much better idea.  I can't stand when doctors tell mothers to take away bottles.  I know for some babies they can become a habit, but jeepers, three bottles a day at one year old sounds fine!  You could slowly work on weaning off one of them, maybe the morning bottle?  This can be done by offering less and less in the bottle and giving him the sippy cup to replace it.  My two year old still has a bottle before bed, he loves it, I'll wean him off eventually just as I have the others and he eats like a champ and drinks out a sippy.

At one they are still absolute babies!!  DON'T feel pressured.  Go with your instincts! 

As for the finger foods I tend to just toss stuff on my son's tray including the fork/spoon and you'll often be surprised how much they figure it out.  Give him lots of opportunity when they're quite hungry and they'll usually figure it out.  At a year, my youngest was eating corn on the cob.  We'd just plop it on his tray and he'd naw away with his two front teeth! 

[andrea21]

On the bottle front my DD was 2 years old when she stopped using her bottle,she had the spout top though just with the normal bottle.She loved her milk and we found this to be the easiest way for her to drink her milk.
Then pretty much over night she changed herself to a normal cup.I look back now and I think it was the best thing for her.She still has 3-4glasses of milk a day now.She loves her milk.

Hope you work it out

Andrea...

[Deb_in_oz]

i agree with gradual and no pressure approach.

on the bottles - Liv is almost 17 mo and still has 2 per day. she loves it and as she is spirited this is what chills her out from hyper to relax and ready for nap and bedtime. and she is getting her milk.  i dropped dd1 last bottles at 20 mo because i did not want to have 2 kids sharing bottles  and she woudl still refuse the milk in a cup (had water in cup since 6 mo though) and since then she has NEVER had a drink of milk - she is 3yo now. she has dairy and has milk in cereal but she never transitioned because we just took it away and figured she woudl settle into the NEW cup we picked out etc... and so we lost that chance to have it as a drink/beverage. i think if i had left it longer she woudl have been more open to the change in her own time but at the time was too young and not interested in changing... SO i am not stressing about dd2. she drinks water every day from her cup and will have sips of milk from it but for a full drink of milk it still is the bottle.

about the solid food: if your starting point is total purees i think you shoudl just start increasing the lumps and get closer to adult style food (first puree, then mashed, then lumpy stage, then chopped pieces). do it as slow or fast as your lo responds to. so if he has no problem with mashed, try increasing the lumps etc.  olivia loves her jars because they are so moist so every week she probably still has 1-2 of the 10-15 mo stage jars or 1-3yo older meals. just provide opportunities to self feed (spoon and finger foods) at every meal and he will eventually pick up on it.  make sure he gets to see you doing the same thing and he will learn by observing your technique... It took Liv a while to get finger foods when we introduced them but once she "got" it she mostly refused to be fed and did it all herself - we just kept offering a few things at every meal and always gave her a spoon to practice with.

good luck and take it one step at a time.  are you in the states? i have noticed that back home there is such a push to get rid of bottles at ayear. i can tell you that no one has ever mentioned it to me at any single doctor or clinic check up here - it is recognized as an individual thing (just like BWing and EASY) and as long as children are not put to bed with a bottle in their mouth or having excessive bottles of milk (that interferes with solid food intake) there is no rush!

[bicah]

Thanks for all your help. I do feel much better about not dropping the bottles all at once. Yes, I am from the States and I agree, they do pressure you to switch right at 12 months. I gave him milk the day before yest and he didnt really care too much for it, but yesterday he drank 6 oz in his bottle. (the dr. said no more that 10-15 oz of milk a day (not sure why, maybe the sugars in it??) so i assume he will be hungrier than he normally is because he was getting over 20 oz of formula a day. I think I will just plan on switching him over to milk then dealing with one bottle at a time. As for the food, I didnt give him any pureed food and surprisingly he did great (although, grabbing a jar is so much easier, LOL) He didnt pick anything up though, just smashed it and pushed it off his tray. I am sure with time that will happen too. I guess it all takes time and a lot of patience. Thanks again

[Andys mum]

just wanted to add our experience...the health nurse told me not to feed Andy pureed food anymore after 12 months...just finger food...if he was hungry he would eat it...and if he didn't eat don't worry and to skip the meal...even if it meant going to bed without dinner....well I can tell you I ignored the advice!  At 15 months he is doing fine with finger food now!  I agree to go with your instincts....
Andy's mum.