easy not easy for us at the moment

[Sylvia.]

i found easy so easy with dd1 but then we only started when she was over 6 months

with dd2 i am finding it difficult establishing easy, rarely does she want to be fed 3 hourly, sometimes i have to wake her which is easy, but what if she wake at 2 hours, then what? just start at this time again

also if i am having trouble putting dd down can run into 1-2 hours then what, mostly i feed her after an hour hoping we can start at this point, doesn't always work, then i feed her again after an hour and then we are back to the 3 hour mark  this is just so hard, i've tried everything, if rocked a few time, paced a few times and put her to sleep in the pram, didn't work, i guess she is not used 2 these, she has no trouble sleeping when we are out

should i just go with it and hope easy happens?

[Zoey]

Aww Russyl!  I don't know how much help I'll be but I wanted to offer mostly some LOVE!

How about you step back, and just write things down for a few days?  Like when she seems hungry, when she seems sleepy, stuff like that.  Then after a few days you can try to get her on easy again?  You can do a 2.5 hour easy too if that is what she needs.  I think this is such a tough time!  Baby is getting used to this huge world that is SO much not like your womb, anbd you are getting used to her and what she is allo about.  Talk about stress!  AND you have another LO.  Bless you darling.

I think, relax and breathe.  It's all going to work out!  We have time to figure easy out!  I think if you step back and watch for a few days - and jot stuff down, it may seem more managable.  You can try and stick with the EASY idea to eat, activity, sleep - but let the times go for now- don't be so hard on yourself .  Maybe she needs to eat more frequently - if so then in a few you can start 2.5 Easy.

Just remember, when you SEE sleepy signs, then its usually too late to avoid overtiredness.  Make a note at when you saw them, and next time know to get her down 10-15 mins before that.  Sometimes when they get overtired it get really hard to get them down.  Is she snuggly swaddled?  Have you tried a paci?  I think they are a great help birth to 3 months!  Perhaps give it a try?

It will all be ok!  BIG HUGE HUGS!

Love,
Zoey

[Sylvia.]

thanks so much for the quick reply, i have been writing stuff down since the day she got home, i think one of the our big problems is that she is overtired before she begins the day, i am guessing she is already awake before she cries out so after i feed her she is ready for bed but and of course i still have to do a nappy, it is at this point i guess i have missed the window of opportunity, okay okay i realise i should wake her and set the time, but i am so tired myself, if only i could get more than 2 1/2 hours sleep straight, she just woke from a 1 1/2 hour nap and i fed her again, only 1 1/2 hours since last feed layed her down and she seems asleep, dd2 will be awake soon, can't ever find the time to bath her as she is always going to be overtired, oh well i shall continue 

[Zoey]

More hugs!  Can someone can help your tired soul?  Anyone - call in the troops!  You need some sleep girlfriend.  How long is she suckling when you feed her?  Careful not to get into a snacking habit.  Try a paci, I think it may help.  By all means if she is hungry feed her but if she only seems to be eating a little then sleeping, and this keep happening, it coul dbe she is just snacking and not taking a full feed, so she can't wait long before she needs to do this again.  Know what I mean? 
Yes, set the time - it may really be easier in a few days if you do hunny.  She won't always be overtired, really.  This time is just tough.  Man I can rememeber it so well.  Heck I took Owen back to the hospital the night of the day we were sent home.  Lol.  You will get through this - try a paci see if it helps.

Aww Hugs hun, I feel for you... wish I could come help ya!
Zoey

[corrina01]

Russyl,  could you post your routine please

[Johanne]

Russyl, our babies had the same due date but my baby was overdue so he is only 12 days old now. I don't know if developmentally they are theoretically the same age though if you adjust?

Anyway, at the minute I wake to feed DS2 if he sleeps longer than 3 hours and try to have some activity between breastfeed and nap if possible. if not I don't worry because i know lo has fallen asleep on his own so can do it. If he wakes up fussing less than 3 hours i just feed him. At all feeds I try and do 20 mins on each breast so he gets both foremilk and hindmilk. If he does for some reason only take 5 or 10 minutes and falls asleep and I can't wake him I generally expect him to be up again a long time before 3 hours is up and sometimes just count 3 hours from the last good feed anyway. The 5 or 10 minutes ones are rare and I think are just comfort ones to settle to sleep. i'm not worrying too mch because he can settle himslef sometimes too.

They are very young, I am still going to be demand led but not letting him go more than 3 hours was started by the midwife due to some excess weight loss and it now has had the effect that he sleeps quite well at night and I can get a 5 and a half hour stretch of sleep, maybe more. I don't think a 2 hourly feed is unusual at this age either though. LO is just waking up now - 2 hours after his last feed. i would see this as quite normal and not try to change it now.

Feeding time! Must dash!

Jo

[Sylvia.]

routine no two days are ever the same

yesterday

self wake - 7.30 feed, under 10 minutes only one side - tried and tried to put her down, less than 45 minutes after wake, using 4s, not luck

10.00 am feed again after no sleep, tried again to put down, to hard, eventally slept 20ish minutes in the pram

12.00 feed again - straight to sleep, not much of anything needed

1.30 self wake, oh my god, feed only slept a short time, can't really remember, 3.00 out in pram, slept slept slept,

5.00 wake to feed, still out, straight to sleep, still out,

8.00 wake dd up, bath, feed, dh tried to put down, no problem, wake change nappy poo, dd puts her down no problem

10.30 self wake, feed

2.15am wake, feed

4.30 wake, feed

7.45 wake to feed, tried to put her down at about 8.30, no go, what gives, i am sure it is my technique, cap nap eventally

10.35 self wake, out, of course she sleeps and sleeps

1.25 feed, out, of course she sleeps and sleeps

3.45 home, tried to put her down, quiet for 15 minutes then cried out feed, very easy to sleep with no 4s

normally we do not go out this much, doctors appointment ...

if only i could master the first nap, this is our biggest problem, 2 and a half hours in her room is not working, cannot get anything done, no shower is the worst, no breakfast, no coffee

tomorrow dh is going to do the first putting to sleep as i have myself convinced it is my technique, i find it very easy to have dd2 over my shoulder

[corrina01]

When my DD was her age, she would sleep nonstop.  Try putting her down after the feed and nappy time.

Also have you done the quizz yet to see what type your DD is?

The quiz is in the FAQ's at the top of the board.

[Sylvia.]

really no activity time at all? she does seem to go down better with little or no activity time, but then she wakes 2ish hours later, then i have to feed her again, then we are on a two routine, how will this become a 3 hour routine? oh thanks so much for your reply
 

[corrina01]

My DD was on a 2.5hr EASY till she was 21/2 months, as she was a premmie by 3 weeks and she was so tiny.

All you can do is ride it through, next week see if can handle some A time for about 15mins.  But if she can't, wait a few days then try again. 

[Sylvia.]

okay, i will try that, thanks, sounds like good advise, what would you do if she has been screaming for more than 1 hour and refusing to settle?

[deenz]

Russyl, I remember how hard those first few weeks are (with #2)....  What really helped me was giving a dummy, not sure if you already to that.  I was quite set against using one initially, but honestly it was a lifesaver!  I felt terrible that I didn't know my dd2 better after 6wks, but I felt like I didn't know when she was tired etc (even though I too had been writing everything down).  And I remember that it was actually sometimes easier to go out, because at least then I knew she'd sleep in her car seat.  Sorry, no real advice, just wanted to empathise!