Won't eat from a spoon

[sophieellen]

Hi,

My dd is 8 months next week and in the past 3 weeks has decided that she only wants to feed herself. I give her a spoon but the food ends up on her hands, in her hair, in the highchair - basically anywhere but in her mouth! If I try and feed her she clamps her mouth shut and turns her head away. She loves finger foods, but again, I'm worried about how much she's actually eating.

I know that she has got her 2 bottom teeth coming thru so I'm blaming it on those as her appetite has been decreasing.
She was at 3 meals a day of fruit and veg purees and had a couple of  tastes of fish (won't touch chicken and thought beef was too tough for gums). She was doing well altho she's never been a huge eater.

Every mealtime is now so disheartening. I don't let my frustration show to her but I am getting to the end of my tether. I have made so many meals for her which end up in the bin. I tried jars which she did like but has even gone off those.
I have now had to up the milk (she was down to 4 ozs but now up to 7ozs) and she has been waking up in the night for a feed (5ozs which she downs in an instant). I know I shouldn't be feeding her in the night but I feel like I'm starving her otherwise and it's cruel.

What can I do? I'm dreading lunchtime. Has anyone else been here?! Heeeellllpp!!

[andibig]

hi
yes this is very common. I think we've all been there at some time with our LOs. IMO i would carry on offering finger foods and the spoon at meal times. DD can spoon feed herself now but wasn't able to do it at 8 months (i just don't think they have the co-ordination at that age ). even if she just plays with the spoon its all part of the learning process for them.
another thing i did with DD was give her things like spagehtti etc (messy foods) and showed her how to eat it with her hands (and yes there was a lot in her hair ) which she loved.
I know its difficult not to worry about it and believe me when i say that i was like that too. I used to dread mealtimes.But in the long run i realised it wasn't worth the worry its not as if i was starving her!!!!. once i became more relaxed about it her eating improved.
i really hope that puts your mind at rest.

[Katet]

Sounds all very normal to me. Just keep up the finger food & give her spoons to play & try to slip on in on the side... I have nearly always fed with about 4-5 spoons at a time.
Also at 8mo milk should still be the main source of nutrients, so dropping down to 4oz seems too little to me... I'm not sure of the formula quantities, but for a bf baby 5 bf/day is normal & I would have thought that would equate to up to 35oz/day... but you might like to check the bottle feeding forum. But I'd certainly think 7oz a time is the right amount as solids are really still  just considered a "top up"  for many babies until at least 9mo & it isn't unreasonable for that to be the case until 12mo

[Samuel's mum]

I would completely recommend the feeder bag/ baby safe feeder. It saved us when Sam went completely anti-spoon. I also got very clever with finger food (roasted veg, pasta, little pies, fruit, toast and dips, sausages, sandwiches).

 http://www.babysafefeeder.com/

Sam is almost 2 (tomorrow!) and is only now beginning to get back into spoons (with him doing it). All that time yoghurt was the only thing he really wanted from a spoon. There's not much you can't eat with fingers!

[sophieellen]

Thanks everyone for your replies. It's so good to hear that others have been there before and it worked out ok.
I will definetely get a feeder bag - thanks for the link.
Lunch and dinner were great. Chicken strips, advocado, toast, melon. She ate most of it too. I tried to help but she refuses food from me and has to do it herself. I think I have a very spirited and independent daughter!!
I feel much better that she's eaten.

Re the milk - I read between 20=28ozs is the norm for a baby this age?? I agree that milk should be the main source so I will try to get her doing 7ozs at each feed.

Thanks so much
xx