How Much do You Offer?

[Mom to M&M]

Just wondering how many foods you all offer your picky toddler... Marisa is still mainly on purees (12 months Friday - yay!) but does have finger foods after each meal. She is getting increasingly picky but I do keep trying new things. But I don't want to become a short order cook either. How many things would you suggest trying? Maybe try one new thing first each time and if that is rejected offer something I'm relatively certain she'll eat? What if that gets rejected but she still seems hungry?

[Nikki~Nathanamp;Danielle]

I guess I fall into the short order cook category. I will try new things out but always fill them up on something they like if it's not something they like. It can take up to 20 tastings before a new flavour is accepted, so I'd just offer a small portion of the new food alongside the regular food (and it will need to be over and over - I wouldn't offer it every day but maybe once or twice a week - so yep it can take 6mths for something new to go down). I have found my ds who was picky pretty much eats everything at just over 3 now. I've never made a big deal of it and he eventually will eat it. At 3 I am able to suggest he takes one bite (it's not mandatory, just a suggestion) and he'll often eat new things because he knows he has the right to say no. We do family meals here, so it's a given that meals will repeat themselves anyway the next week, so it's not like I'm cooking up something especially for it to be rejected iykwim?

[Marisa's Mom]

Ok, I know they recommend that you introduce a new item, wait a few days, then try again ... just to see if there are any reactions, allergies, etc.  I try to do something like that, but I have been guilty of giving her several new things all at once ... so if she had an issue with one of them, it  would have been hard to figure out which food it was. Fortunately she ate new stuff without any problems.  I generally like to give her one new thing at a time (one new thing per day, not a new thing at each meal during the day), along with the usual stuff I know she will eat. Sometimes she takes to new stuff right away, other times it takes a few tries before she decides she likes it. I try not to push it. If she doesn't like the new thing, that's fine.

[Nikki~Nathanamp;Danielle]

Oh sorry, wasnt' thinking about allergy testing still. So yep, if it's totally new like that offer it every day. I must admit 2nd time around I offered complete meals with a few new things in them at a time so if there was a reaction I'd know it was a combination of a few new things and then eliminate from there. Fortunately we haven't had any problems, so I haven't gone down that track.

[Mom to M&M]

Makes sense Nikki. So then would you suggest, for example, that I continue to start the meal with her puree and when we are done with that offer whatever new food and if she rejects it then offer something she usually likes and if she still rejects that then offer a standby like Cheerios? And maybe try that same new food again the next meal?

Unfortunately we dont' get to do many family meals yet as DD's dinner is too early and DH is not home in time.

[Nikki~Nathanamp;Danielle]

My DH doesn't get home in time for when the kids are hungry either - but what I do is cook a meal for all of us, I sit and eat with the kids and then DH eats his when he gets home. Saves on cooking two meals and the kids get to try a different range of food that they otherwise probably wouldn't. BTW, I used to do what you do when I only had DS and he was still eating frozen meals that I made for him, but because he's now on proper meals I have just always done that with dd. Also I think it can be motivating for them to see us all eating together - the social thing and all that.

But yep, your plan sounds good - offer the usual, I'd also put the new food actually on the tray so it's there if she wants to pick it up and have a nibble while you're offering the puree. I probably wouldn't offer it as a separate "here you are, something new to try" type of way, just here's your meal and just see what she does. If she ignores it, no worries, just continue offering the puree until she's full or if you finish meals with yoghurt or fruit then just move on to those but I'd probably tend to leave the new food in front of her - if all she does is play with it, then so be it for now.

[Mom to M&M]

Interesting - so leave the food there WHILE I'm feeding her the puree? I've never done that before - always did puree first and then put finger/table foods down when we were done with that. She gets distracted and overwhelmed pretty easily so I'm not sure she will do well with that but I'm certainly willing to try if you think it will help. If that doesn't work should I put the new food down the same time as something I know she'll eat - like the new food plus also some cheese dices or whatever? Also, any thoughts on when I stop giving so much puree first and move more to the finger/table foods? Or do I wait until she starts refusing the purees - which so far she never does unless she's full or sick.

Thx again - you've been really helpful!

BTW - we do try to eat together more on the weekends and DH is on vacation next week so maybe that will help!

[JennŠ]

Try just a couple of bites on the tray at once so she does not get overwhelmed.  Last night Charlie got 2 pieces of banana and 2 bites of sandwich at a time.  Also prevents stuffing too much in at once.  (kinda)   The sandwich was new, the fruit was a favorite.  I agree, just a matter of fact approach. 

[Nikki~Nathanamp;Danielle]

It's funny reading this, I pretty much did what you are doing with my ds - he was still on a lot of meals that I needed to feed him. But dd is on all finger food now. She just uses her hands to pick up handfulls of food even if it is a casserole type meal. She skipped the chunky puree stage and went straight to finger food only at around 8mths and I probably helped her out until around 12mths. The only food I need to spoon in for her now is yoghurt - but at 16mths she's now got using a spoon figured out (sometimes!).

Our guidelines in NZ say from 12mths that kids can be having regular family type meals - so no longer needing puree. So yep, I'd just add a bit of finger food the same time as what you're offering and wean out the purees - I can see now what is probably happening. Because you have a puree meal prepared, then she finishes it you need to find something else, so it's easiest to top her up using finger foods which are bits and pieces. Whereas if you just offer a big meal that is a regular family type meal it will be a combo of finger foods and something requiring a spoon.

[Mom to M&M]

Thanks again - I'll definitely try that - putting table foods down same time as I feed purees and see what happens. Since she loves grilled cheese I tried a grilled banana sandwich (just wheat bread, butter and banana) this morning but she didn't like it. At least she tasted it though! So when that happens would I try that food again same day? Best to wait a few days? How did you get your DS to start eating more variety?

[Nikki~Nathanamp;Danielle]

I'd probably leave it a few days, just remember that it takes xx number of times to like (or decide not to like) something. Not sure what you do, but I'd sit down and eat the same thing as you're offering her so she sees you enjoying it too. I didn't really have a big plan with getting DS to eat stuff, but just realised when he was close to 2 that his range of likes increased and he became less picky.

Good luck.

[ks6]

At 13 months, I feed ds whatever we're eating for dinner, just a few pieces at a time.  He always has Cheerios available just in case.  Usually, he tries a bite of everything, and then points to what he wants.  He is very clear about telling me if I've put the "wrong" food on his tray.  Rather than finish all of one food first, he likes to take a few bites of each, then goes back to the first food.  I think this has helped me sneak in new foods.  If he spits something out, he still gets to try it again the next day as leftovers.  He likes almost everything, but we're still working on brussel sprouts.