HELP! NAP QUESTIONS BEFORE I GET STARTED

[Zoey]

Hiya!

I too read the no cry sleep solutions.  Alot of Pantley's concepts are similar to Tracy's, as she doesn't think babies should be left to fighure stuff out on their own either.  We even use her Gentle Removal Plan for paci and breast.  However we are not really well versed in her methods and solutions.

I think if you want to pull parts of Pantley into your parenting, that is great.  But I also think the parts you tried that failed and messed things up - well that is in the past now.  What's important now, is that Stacy has laid out a great plan for you and your baby - and now is the time to put what she has said into action and give it a try.  You won't know if its going to work, unless you have at it and stick with it for 2 weeks.  Stick with it ALL the way, not half or just parts - its a plan, and needs to be done a certain way to work correctly.

The stressed points here are commitment - to one plan, to one way, for as long as it takes.  And consistency - to one plan, each time you do it, for as long as it takes.

Here is a success story I think my help you:  https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=67630.0 - here we set a plan up for a similar situation and she had fabulous results.

Good Luck Hun, don't be afraid - we have so many successes here with these methods - they work if you keep at them.

Zoey

[Lauren_Mommy]

Thanks everyone for all your advice.  I'll create a plan and send it off. Zoey, I read the link you sent - thanks!! She'll be my inspiration.

A night-related question:  It seems that Sophia is teething right now- I think her incisors are comming in.  Should I wait until they come it or just give her lots of pain relievers and start it anyway? 


 

[Lauren_Mommy]

Hi Stacy and Zoey,

What do you think of this plan - I'd like to get started tonight - but she missed her afternoon - and is already tired and cranky - oops!  It's only 4:20!:

Bedtime - Bedtime routine starts at 6pm. Asleep by 7pm  (I'll probably move it up a little tonight).

2 Dream Feeds for the first night: 11 pm and 2:30am
1 Dream Feed for the next few nights: 11 pm
If she wakes other times, don't feed her put sooth her and do PU/PD

Wake at 6:00am
BF and Breakfast

8:30First Nap - Nap train - put in Crib use PU/PD.

Lunch at 11:00 - 11:30
Second Nap - 12:30 nap Train

Dinner at 5:00pm

[Lauren_Mommy]

First, she's super cranky - missed an afternoon nap - should I start this tomorrow instead?

Oh,
I will do the basic PD method - not Wi/Wo at this time.
When she cries for me, I'll come in and lay my hand on her stomach with some light pressure.  Don't say much, try to soothe her in the crib and say "you're only going to sleep" "sleep - sleep.   If she bucks up in the corner, i'll pull her down a bit.  If she gets on all fours or sits up, I'l lay her back down. If she stands up (never done this when really upset), I'll do PD - no eye contact.  (Do I give no eye contact the whole time?) 

Only pick up if frantic and momentarily - put her right back down - facing away from me.

Does this sound right?

[Zoey]

I am so proud of you!  There is no time like the present.  I have high hopes for you and Lauren.

Go for it!
Zoey

[Lauren_Mommy]

Thanks - she just cried herself to sleep - I was there soothing her with my sh-sh and rubbing her tummy intermittently.  I did have to pull back down, from bucking up - but I think she's soon going to realize that that is not going to get her picked up and fed. I picked her up briefly.  BUT NO BOOB!  :-D

I better get things ready for bed, cause it's going to be a long night.  But I already feel better finally being the one in control again. 

Question: should I ONLY feed her if it's me initiating the dream feed?  What if she wakes up right at that time?

Regarding the Walk-in/Walk-out - I think I'd like to hold off on that for the night - is PD a good option though? Or does it usually inevitably lead to standing-up games?  Henry's Momma said she only did WI/WO for naps when they're playing and not napping.  Your thoughts?

[Zoey]

Again, I am so proud of you!  Hang on tight, you can do this - don't give up.  You are in charge, be confident - you know what you are doing here.

Big hugs!
Zoey

[Lauren_Mommy]

Thanks both of you!!

Stacy - so it won't hurt the process if I feed her at those times if she wakes?  Just make sure she doesn't fall asleep nursing if she wakes me up - right?

What if she wakes at 10ish - should I go ahead and feed her then and not again until 2:30?  (She often also wakes up around midnight also)  Will this confuse her?

[Lauren_Mommy]

My milk supply has been a little low lately.  She did have a nice bowl of food for dinner, and I gave her a sippy cup of water at bedtime - in case she was simply thirsty (We live in the desert - I drink water throughout the night). 

If I give her a nice feeding at 11ish then I'll probably just forget the 2:30 feeding.

[Lauren_Mommy]

I wonder if I should sleep in the daybed in the nursery.  If she wakes tonight - should I sooth her back down asap so she doesn't fully awaken?

[Lauren_Mommy]

Okay - we made it through the night here's what happened after bedtime:

She woke at 10:30 - I went ahead and fed her but put her back down as soon as she stopped feeding. She cried for about 10 minutes.

She woke at 1 am - I went in but didn't feed her. She cried on and off for 50 minutes and went back to sleep
She woke up shortly after at 2:30 - I was just about to give her a dream feed, so I started to feed her - but she wasn't really drinking, so I put her back down - she cried for about 5 minutes and went to sleep
She woke up for the day at 6:20!!
Gave her a long nursing - the nursing I've actually enjoyed in a loooong time.

Today's morning "nap":
Put her down after short nursing and did a wind down with a book and quick cuddle - she was rubbing her eyes so layed her right down at 8:50.  She cried for about 30 minutes - she finally went to sleep, but awoke after 15 minutes.  Then tried to soothe her back down for about 15 minutes, went to sleep for I think 25-30 minutes.
Up at 10am - nursed

Just finished lunch

It's 11:35 - When should start the afternoon nap wind down? Should I wait until i see tired signs or until a set time? How long should I try to put her down - a full 40 minutes?

[Lauren_Mommy]

Yes, it was feed time- trying to keep the milk supply up. But I'll try to avoid doing it too close to nap times.

I just had a bad experience with the afternoon nap. She went down within 10 minutes and then I goofed and woke her up by opening the door (to turn off the air conditioning).  She woke up and when I tried to get her back to sleep, she started frantically crying (trying to catch her breath kind of cry). I held her for a while to get her to calm down a little. I decided it was too much and put her down for a few seconds walked out and walked back in for a "nap's over wake up".  She took a while to console even out of the room in the light.  I hope I didn't set us back any or "up'd the ante" as Tracy would say.

[Lauren_Mommy]

She settled herself tonight completely peacefully - babbling herself to sleep.  Let's hope our nightweaning goes well also.

[Zoey]

Can we dance?  Let's dance!    Great work Mommy!  You should be SO proud of yourself.  Keep at it, you won't be sorry.

BIG HUGE HUGS!!

Love,
Zoey

[Lauren_Mommy]

Yeah - only she often settles herself like this - but still wakes up to nurse often.  But from now on, the All-Night Dinner is closed!   

It was great to see that after a rough Nap time, she can get back in her crib without crying. Thank god we never did the cry-it-out method.  I can't tell you how many people told us "just close the door and let her cry for a couple hours".  Even if this takes longer and is harder, it's worth it. She trusts me and my husband 100% - I'd hate to loose that.

One tip that Tracy gave is great: EARPLUGS!!  It's not only saved my hearning, I think it's an emotional buffer as well. (sort of like watching a scary movie with the sound off  ) It's helped me stay calmer and more peaceful for her through this.