frustrated

[xraychic]

I'm starting to think all this is a bunch of BS.  I can't spend 30-40 min in her room trying to get her to sleep for 40 min.  She was up at 5am after sleeping  since 8 pm. Slept all night. Finally got her to fall asleep at 6:15 and she woke up at 7:15. I started to get her to sleep at 8:15 she was out by 8:40 and back up 1 hour later. gave up at 10:15 and fed her at 10:30 she ate last at 7:30. shhh/pat does not work she lays there looking at me. But if I leave and let her try to fall asleep that doesn't work either. Sometimes the bink works and sometimes it doesn't. Anyone have any ideas. I go back to work in 3 weeks so Idon't even know how the babysitter is gonna be able to do it cause her environment is gonna change when she starts going there during the day.

[Missy Lou]

xraychic - your post made me smile.  i know it wasn't supposed to.  but it sounded like i felt when i first tried this.  this junk doens't work and i quit.  but believe it or not, my lo is 6 months and we're doing great.  she has issues now with all of the developmental stuff going on and teething but believe me, without a routine, her and i would be crazy.

so, i think in 3 weeks, we can at least get things better. 

let's start with how old is your baby? 

tell me more about your routine - when does she eat?  how long does she play?  how long does she usually nap at one time? 

when do you use pat/shhh?  is she upset and fussing at any time when you're using it? 

does she ever fall alseep alone?  what does she do when you leave the room - cry? 

do you swaddle?

do you nurse or bottle feed?

just to let you know, my lo didn't actually like her pacifier until she was about 8 weeks.  and it's really great that she can sleep from 8 to 5.  i don't know her age but if you're just about to go back to work, i assume she's under 6 ot 7 months.

melissa

[xraychic]

she is 8 weeks old 

yesterday looked like this

eat 6:15 am
a- 6:45-7
s-7:30-9:25

e- 9:30
a - 10- 10:15
s- 10:30- 12:30 ( had to wake her up )

e- 12:30
a - 1:15- 1:30( took forever to eat/ poopy diaper)
s 1:50- 2:40( could not get her back to sleep)

e- 3
a- 3:30- 3:45
s 4:20- 5( tried to get her back to sleep till 5:30 , gave up had to start dinner)

e- 6:15
a- bath at 6:45
s started at 7, she did not go to sleep till 8

she slept all night till 5, I got up and gave her a bottle, she went back to sleep by 6:15 and woke up at 7:20 or so. She ate at 7:30 and a little after 8 I took her up to put her to sleep, she finally went to sleep around 8:35 and woke up at 9:45, she ate around 10:20 and around 11 we went up to try and sleep, she slept from 11:15-12 and we gave up getting her back to sleep and she's been awake in her bouncy chair for the last 15 min.

Any suggestions..................

[Missy Lou]

i'm about to feed lo lunch which will be a while because she's a little messy but i'm going to read the routine and post back. 

melissa

[xraychic]

plus my son starts school on mon.  I will be taking him and picking him up since I'm off work, plus that's what the sitter does only she's closer to school. Anyhow that's frustrating me even more thinking about that.


Jamie

[xraychic]

She just ate so we're gonna get in the car and go to the store I know she'll get some shut eye then.

[Missy Lou]

at 8 weeks, she shouldn't be up for more than an hour.  it looks like she's up for an hour and a half sometimes. that may make it harder for her to nap.  also it looks like she eats more than 3 hours sometimes.  she's really young and 3 hours is long enough. 

at night, she's up at 5 and bedtime doesn't start until 7 and that's what i do for my 6 month old.  i know it's a hard time having the rest of the family to help out.  but the other family members aside, when she gets up at 5, i would bathe her and prepare her for bed then feed her dinner at 6.  she should be in bed no much later than 6.  i always had a hard time with the last meal because it doesn't fall right.  for her to only be up an hour plus eat after 3 hours, she'll be going to bed just a few minutes after eating but i think as long as you don't feed her to get her to sleep then she'll be fine.  maybe after eating, she can tell everyone good night and you two can go into her dark room and sing to her and then put her down by 6:10.  then you can finish getting dinner ready.

use the catnap to start dinner and leave it simmer.  my best friend became our crockpot because it required so little when i was busy with a baby. 

now, you're concerned about how bringing your son to school and picking him up will affect your baby's routine? 

lastly, a thought about errands, is it possible to leave her behind sometimes?  does she get over excited in the store?  it may take her a while to settle back down with all that stuff going on around her.  when my lo takes power naps in the car but not a full naptime, then when we get home, she wakes up but can't get back to sleep so she doesn't get enough sleep. 

i'm sure it's really difficult juggling so much.  it sounds like you are doing a good job though.  she at least is on some kind of routine and that really helps her.
melissa

[xraychic]

keep in mind we just started this and the only reason she is up for an hour and a half is because I've already been trying to get her to sleep and we've given up. plus she is eating every three hours in my example from yester day one time she went 15 min longer.

[xraychic]

this morning she was up at 7, she did not nap at all after 3 pm yesterday couldn't get her down, finally got her to sleep at 9p!!  Anyhow at 7:45am we went to her room got ready for nap, laid her down before asleep 5 min later she started fussing, went back in and she was sucking her thumb but couldn't get to sleep. took about 30 min of shh/pat but she went to sleep @ 8:45 and woke up @ 9:20 . She wasn/t crying so I tried to let her soothe herself she did for about 20 min then started crying. Tried to shhh/pat for 20 more min. didn't work. Went downstairs at 10 because 10:15 is time to eat. Anyhow daddy is gonna give nap time a try @ 10:45.

[Missy Lou]

i must have misunderstood your post.  sorry about that.  it looked like she was up for 3 hours at a time sometimes.  i don't know what i was thinking with the eating.  you're right the 15 minutes is nothing. 

i'm about to leave for work but i'll be back on tonight after lo goes to bed.  i'll be able to post longer about yesterday.  your poor little angel though, she must be exhausted and you must be aggravated.  if you get a chance, let me know how last night went and today.
melissa

[Missy Lou]

is she swaddled?

i know it doesn't seem like it and you know your baby better but in my experience when they're fighting sleep so much at first, they just aren't tired enough to go to sleep yet.  could you try keeping her up just an extra 5 minutes at a time?  that's a good way to slowly increase her A time without a huge shock to her. 

do you have tracy's third book?  there's a sample routine in it for a baby eating every 3 hours.  i could copy it onto the board if you don't have the book though.
melissa

[xraychic]

She eneded up taking 2 good two hour naps on sun. in the afternoon and went to bed at 7:30 and slept till 6:30. Yesterday she got one good nap in the late morning, the first one she cat napped because we had to take her big brother to school and the second I had to wake her up to pick him up, and wouldn't ya know that little stinker didn't go to sleep in the car. Anyhow It's gonna be trial and error here the next few weeks with taking him back and forth to school, which is what the sitter does so we'll have to find a way around it. Anyhow I"ve decided to follow the 3 hour easy routine, minus the sleep training. I want to rock my little girl to sleep the way I did my son, and I've felt so bad about people not recomending it and saying it's wrong. It's not wrong, it's part of my bonding time with her and her daddy feels the same way so we're just going to concentrate on making sure she's not up for too long at a time. I'll be back at work full time soon and I want to have that special bonding time with her. It's such a pleasure to watch them fall asleep in your arms.

[clarapist]

Hi, I've  been lurking this thread. Can you post that 3 hour routine, Melissa? I am having trouble figuring out a "bed time".


I would give anything for my DS (also 8 weeks) to sleep from 8-5!  I can't seem to get enough calories in him during the day. 

Jill

[Missy Lou]

xraychic:  i totally understand about rocking your lo to sleep.  i think most people here don't do consistently so that it's not the way lo is used to sleeping in case someone else watches lo during the day or when they're 15 pounds (like my lo) and it's hard to hold them anymore .  but look, i use her catnap as cuddle time.  i work and get home about 20 minutes before catnap and we sit in the glider and rock.  i rocked her to sleep and slept with her until i started reading babywhisperer but i was just unsure if i could always be there to rock her so i tried the techniques to get her to sleep by herself. 
i'm really happy to hear how well sunday went and the night time sleep went.  trial and error seems to be the way with figuring out lo's routines.  i always think i know what her routine is and then a few weeks later, it's different.  i'm sure you'll find a good way to adjust her routine around your son's school.
please do what makes you and your lo happy.  i have learned to trust my instincts when it comes to my baby.  i know no one meant to make you feel bad about wanting to cuddle with your little angel.  it's definitely not a bad thing to be a loving mom.     i think the routine tracy suggests is great.  it helps me figure out how to adjust her routine the older she gets too.  so good luck following that and if you need any other suggestions or want to just post and keep us updated, please do so.

clarapist - i just posted somewhere else to you.  let me find that and i'll post the routine there. 

melissa