3rd night on EASY didnt go well... need advice

[Sabbynur]

Hello dear mums,

It's friday night here in south australis (1.30am) and i've just finally put dd to sleep.

On fridays we always spend the evening and dinner time at my mother in law's place. I was a bit worried about how to go on with dd new's routine on Easy. She did so well last night, only took her 15 mins to get to sleep.

DD had dinner at 6pm (milk only) instead of 6.30pm and then at 8pm had fruits. She didnt had her afternoon nap and only catnat for 15mins around 9pm when we were at my mother in law's house. (She had a big nap in the morning 2h30). She really had a fun time there and always enjoy being there. She crawled a lot today, in the afternoon at home and in the evening at grandma's. She was really happy and excited and didnt look tired at all, and didnt want to sleep. We got back home at 11pm and immediately changed her in her pj's and brought her into the bedroom, as i have done for the past two days. She didnt want her dreamfeed milk and was very sleepy and tired. We said prayers and sang a lullaby as usual and put her down. She almost fell asleep instantly and woke up 30mins later in screams!!
I ran to her and tried to calm her down before picking her up without much success. Had to do pick up and put down several times and still didnt work, she was really screaming and in terrible tears. It was so hard to bear! I had to hold her in my arms, as she was used to before to calm her down and make her fall back into sleep. And when she seemed calmed and was falling into sleep (but not totally asleep) i put her down in her bed. It is now 1.30am and i just left her. And even though i've calmed her down, she still was sobbing and in her sleep was still sobbing too (you know when you have cried a lot, and makes little noises when you breathe, can't find the right word).

My question is, is that normal for her to do this on the 3rd night on EASY? Or is it because her routine changed today and she was overtired?
If so, should i not go out in the evenings (past her bedtime) anymore?
I have another family dinner tomorrow night, don't know what to do?

Thanks for your input.

[Grace's Mom]

I would say that it definitely could have been because she was overtired and overstimulated which of course makes it really hard for them to sleep and stay asleep.  I know for us, we just make sure we are home for bed time routine which starts at 6:15 and in bed by 7ish.  It makes things more difficult but in a few years I know we will be wishing they were in bed by 7 

I hope it all works out. Good luck with EASY.  It really is worth it.

-Melissa

[rebecaq]

Hi again!!

I agree with Melissa, she was definitely overtired. She's too young to be eating at 8pm, at that time she should be fast asleep.  While she's still getting the hang of things could you invite your MIL over for dinner? Or maybe ask her to have an early dinner so you guys can go home and put dd to bed?

HTH

 

- Beca

[Sabbynur]

Thanks Beca and Melissa for your imput.

Yes, I believe she was overtired too. But the thing is that this is also a routine to go there every Friday night for dinner and spent time with grandma. This is the only time we can go there. There is also her little cousin of 7months old who comes there too and they play together with grandma and the mums, while the dad go to play their cricket game (they are in a club and have games only on Friday).

My point was that before we started the EASY Routine, she was very much ok with that. Because then her bebtime was very late too. She would have dinner around 8.30pm then she would sometimes sleep till 11 or 12 then i feed her again and then sleep till morning (in her bed). Some nights, even when we are at home, she wouldnt sleep until 11 or 12. Just wants to play and be with us.
When i go to family gatherings, I would usually bring her bassinet with us and she when it was her nap time, we try to put her to sleep, i would hold her in my arms or sometimes grandma's arms, and she would fall asleep, then we would put her in her bassinet in a quieter room. But sometimes she won't sleep because she wants to play with everyone else. She really likes the attention she gets from the others.

But since her routine has changed, and that i am trying to get her to sleep on her own (without me or anybody else holding her to fall deep asleep before we can put her down) we didnt do that last night. I saw she was a getting tired, so i went into the bedroom and put her into the bed, surrounded by pillows and making sure she was safe, she immediately fell asleep and but woke up after 15mins.

My point is we dont want to change this routine of going to grandma's on Friday and play with cousin etc. But when we go there, how do i put her to sleep there. Should i hold her in my arms, or let anyone else hold her? Should i keep bringing her bassinet to make her sleep there? She is used to sleeping this way before when we are out of the house and she does have any problems with it. And usually when we got back home, i would feed her and put her to sleep (in my arms) and she would usually sleep fairly quickly and sleep till morning.

Thanks for trying to help me out understanding this issue, and please do let me know if you think i am doing this the wrong way!

[joannad]

Sounds like it to me too.  MY DD1 was so easy to settle but DD2 is touchy & I had a night like that on Thurs 1.5 hours to settle I had to walk away & DH take over I couldn't cope with it.  If you catch her 'sleep window' she coos & gurggles but miss it badly & it's pure meltdown!  Watch her carefully & learn to read her signs - it does get better.

[Sabbynur]

Hello ladies,

Thank you for your advice.

Indeed, you were all right. LO was really tired on Friday, she didnt had her afternoon nap and went to bed late.

On Saturday, we did go to the family gathering. But this time i made sure she had her two naps and during the evening, she slept in daddy's arms in a quiet room. And when we got back home, she slept as soon as i put her down in her crib.

It's really amazing how fast EASY works (well at least for the night sleep).
I was very worried that it would take a lot of days and time and cries to get her to stop using me as a prop. But she is getting used to the idea that she has to sleep in her crib now. Of course she not 100% happy about it, but after being by her side and patting her for 10-15mins, she falls asleep fairly quickly.

Now i have to work on the naps. (Need some help in that section.. will post in naps)

Thanks again for your help.
Greetings from down under,
Sabby

[rebecaq]

Hi Sabby! 

I'm glad to hear that you were able to work the kinks out!  As for the night's at grandma's, I think it's a good idea to stick to the routine as much as possible, but without holding her in your arms to sleep. They get very used to that very quick.  Maybe you could try her stroller, because once she gets too big for the bassinet then you could be facing another problem.  I got ds used to napping in his stroller from time to time when he was very young so that if I was ever running errands and nap time came around he would be able to nap easily without a meltdown.  I think that is one of the things I'm happiest that I did, we can be in a mall wlaking around and he can easily fall asleep in his stroller and I can get my things finished 

All in all it sounds like you are both doing great! 

EASY works when you commit to it, so kudos to you for commiting to it so well!!

- Beca

[Sabbynur]

Thanks Beca!

I am pretty happy and proud that i am able to make her sleep by herself!! lol...

The pram idea is a good one. She does sleep/nap in it too when we are out and about. But i don't know if it would be practical to use it inside grandma's house (it's a pretty big one and there are two babies at the same time on friday nights dinner - with all theirs stuff : walkers, bouncer seats, bags and other equipments etc... lol). But i might use it in last resort! I am willing to try anything to not get her to sleep in my arms again (it's really not fair for her after all the efforts she is putting into it and i definately don't want her to get the wrong message!)

Thanks once more for your advice! It's been really helpful.