Toddler wind down routines

[cath~]

Hi foxy,

I just read your comment about chamomile and lavender and wondered if you'd had any luck with it?

When L was little (pre crawling) I used to massage her before bed and the oil was a calming blend including chamomile and lavender. I think it helped a lot. I had to stop though cos she wouldn't stay still for it but maybe I could try again now she's older... Or use the oil in some other way...  How do you use it?

I find it really hard to get L in a good relaxed stated before I PD for bed. She is always so alert and active at the moment!

[*foxy*]

Hi cathn

I put it in her bath sometimes or sprinkle it on a dark coloured cushion or something (its yellowy in colour so seemed to stain her sheets) and put it in her room whilst she was in the bath and close her door so when we went in there after the bath her room smelt of the oil. I found it very soothing and relaxing but I'm not sure if it helped her! Someone mentioned chamomile tea (made up very strongly) and putting it in the bath is supposed to help sooth and promote deep sleep. I haven't tried that. Rescue remedy night seems to help, I use it too and it definitely helps me.
Our DD is awful at BT, she's been particularly awful the last week. OT or OS is a big factor so we're still working on her routine and the wind down.

[cath~]

Hi foxy - thanks. You've got me all inspired to try that now. I might try adding some chamomile to L's bath and see if it helps. Sorry your BTs are so tough at the moment. Hope they get better soon. L went through a patch like that recently. They're still not great but improving gradually.. although the teething and SA isn't helping things!

[*foxy*]

Yep, we've got SA too, so hard to deal with! Things are gradually getting better here too although not quickly enough! Good luck with your bedtimes, hope the chamomile helps.

[cath~]

Put some chamomile in L's bath this eve and gave her a v quick mini massage with chamomile and lavender oil. Smelt lovely and she seemed to like it so will continue with this.

BT was horrible today though (after I PD) but that was for other reasons...

Was also doing some reading and frankincense is recommended as being another good one but the trouble is it's at least twice as expensive as the others...  Might splash out on it one day though.

[*foxy*]

Yeah these oils can cost the earth. Glad your DD liked the chamomile though, hope it helps when you haven't got other things going on.

The sense of smell can be very powerful so I also thought that if DD was used to that smell at BT it may help when we're staying away from home to hopefully comfort her if shes feeling a bit insecure being somewhere new, who knows. We didn't have a great BT either, SA definitely not helping! Good luck tonight

[trimbler]

Interesting to hear about your experiences with oils - the only time I've ever tried anything like that was chamomile tea and lavender oil in DS bath when he had nappy rash! Might give the lavender oil a go to scent his room...

It's still taking ages for DS to wind down after PD, but we have tonsillitis and teething issues at the moment too so not really expecting too much just yet... I'm a bit wary of extending WD too much or we lose some flexibility if we're away/travelling and needing to have dinner out or something - a longer WD would mean having to rush back sooner or not getting to our destination in time to do the whole thing before he gets OT... But I guess if he needs it, he needs it! Kind of extended it a bit by trying to ensure he gets some 'physical' time (easier to go for a short walk outside now that it's lighter for longer) after dinner, then watching a few short films on youtube ('super simple songs')- which he loves and asks for at other times during the day but we try to limit it, then while I'm running his bath I let him select 2 books to read at bedtime and make sure that there are no other books in his room! When I manage to do this successfully, it's one less thing for him to get wound up about right before PD; when I forget to remove the other books, he's so desperate for more that when I say no I think it riles him and makes it harder for him to relax!

Still not sure about A times etc so may be getting this completely wrong but atm aiming for more sleep as he's ill. Will have to reassess once he's better!

[1stimer]

One thing Ive noticed that has helped in the past week for our wind down is we try to do some calm play (no nosiy flashing toys with crazy music, no chasing each other around the house etc) starting 30min before we go upstairs to finish putting DD down. Ive found that I have to remind my husband about it more than I have to calm my daughter now (she definately gets all of her energy from him) and I stopped letting her watch the cartoons that are on at that time if they are too stimulating. We usually have it on one of two channels for background noise and music while we play in the living room etc but I read somewhere (cant remember) that the amount of screen changes that happen in a cartoon can really affect a childs mood, so the calmer the cartoon the better. And I have noticed a difference this week already!!! (knock on wood!!!!)

[Mama_Mia]

My DS is so spirited that you cant really wind him down. As long as he is up he wants to be going. But here is what we have done..

(18 months), Bath, Jammies, say goodnight to the sun, shut off all the lights in the house, rock and have bottle, then into bed.

(2yrs)  Bath, jammies then bottle while mommy rocked him and sang silent night. Finish his bottle then rocked another 5 minutes and into bed.

Now (2 yrs 2 months)  he has decided he LOVES mickey mouse clubhouse so we do the same routine except that after his bath and jammies, he gets to sit on the couch and watch Mickey Mouse for 30 minutes, then we do the bottle,rocking,singing and into bed.

[dylansmum21]

Any tips for winding down a very active (physically and mentally) toddler (21 months) who will not settle to bed?

He finishes dinner between 5:45/6pm then daddy comes home which I think hypes him up as he wants to play with him and they like the rough, tickly play.

He's started asking to go in the bath which he stays in for anything between 15-45 mins depending on his mood but after this he just will not settle so I'm wondering if he's not getting enough wind down time?

We usually do nursery after bath for nappy and pj's then he lays in his bed and has his bottle, we sit with him (he used to fall asleep with us sat there) but then he just finishes his milk, gets up from bed, plays around, sings, chats, cries whenever we put him back in bed, flicks the plugs by his bed and it takes over an hour (and a lot of frustration and tears) to get him to sleep

[MarciaMSPT]

Wondering - my 21.5 month old will scream if I were to put him in his crib before he was asleep (in my arms).  This started at about 18 months.  Do they grow out of that?  I read so many littles here talk themselves to sleep - how do I get to that point with our wind down (which lasts about 45 minutes at times).

[cath~]

Hello - sorry you didn't get a reply. 

I think that some LOs can grow out of it but it can take a while.  IME, simply changing your wind down routine won't necessarily help on its own.  If you would like him to be able to settle independently in his cot then you may have to do some gentle sleep training.  Is that something you'd be interested in?  You say it started at 18 months - did he settle by himself before?  If not, then Gradual Withdrawal would probably be the best method for you to try.  It's explained more here:
Toddlers: Walk In/Walk Out vs. The Gradual Withdrawal Method (HOW TO CHOOSE)

If you have more questions after reading that then please do start your on thread with your questions on the Sleeping for Toddlers board:
Sleeping For Toddlers

The ladies here are great and you'll be sure to get some helpful advice

[Twosweetgirls]

hey! Any ideas for a routine for putting two kids down at one time? I have an older child, 4, who has been really good at going to sleep after our routine, but my second child, 20 months, has never found sleep easy.  We are at least at the point where she sleeps the night, and falls asleep at nap time well.  The girls sleep in a room together so it really makes sense to put them to sleep at the same time. I've done this long enough so the younger one is thrown and sad harder to put to sleep if the older one isn't there.  Always, I am pregnant and frustrated with the second child's go-to-sleep needs at night.  Does anyone have a routine for a spirited child along with an older child?

[cath~]

Hello,
sorry you haven't had any replies.  This thread is pretty quiet now.  You might get more ideas and people seeing your post if you start your own thread with the same question.