breastfeeing 2 under 2

[Ethan and Will's mama]

Hi everyone!

Need some advice; I have a 22 month old son and a 3 1/2 month old son and am breastfeeding both! It is so hard sometimes to deal with them both. My oldest needs a boob to go to sleep for his naps as well as an AM feed. Any suggestions as to how I can ween my older without making him jealous of his little brother? Two can be so tough and I worry that my oldest feels alone at times; therefore I am worried that if I stop breastfeeding him he might really feel left out. The guilt is so strong; I want to make both boys happy but I have such a hard time with it that I find myself getting frustrated all the time.

Any suggestions???
Thank you so much(in advance)!!!!!!

[mommyjill]

First of all - GOOD FOR YOU FOR TANDOM NURSING! I can't imagine how hard that would be. I had planned on doing that too but my DD1 was only 6 months old when I got pregnant with DD2 and was reliant on my BM for the majority of her calories. When my milk started to dry up I was forced to wean her at 13 months. It killed me, but she did just fine! I don't have much advice for you since your concerns seem legitimate. Your DS1 is going through a big change right now and as we know that's not the easiest time to ween....There is a WONDERFUL breastfeeding site I go to often and I bet you can find some great support/advice on there. It's http://www.kellymom.com - click on Forums and find the one that fits. Good luck!

[Ami ~ 3 girls' mom]

This might help too: http://www.mothering.com/discussions/forumdisplay.php?f=310

 

[binxyboo]

La Leche League have a website, just google it in. They have a forum similar to this, great advice there!

[Lana]

I am just going to move this over to the breastfeeding board cause you will probably get more responses

[Samuel's mum]

If there was a little icon with a person saying 'we're not worthy' a la the movie Wayne's World I would insert it here. well done for your committment so far.

There's a book called Adventures in Tandem Nursing that covers a wide range of topics. There's more about it here: http://nursingtwo.kellymom.com/

I think if you are looking to wean your eldest it might be tricky but of course with love and patience you will be successful. Think one step at a time. I think your first step could be to remove his dependence on needing to nurse to go down for his naps. It may not be easy but I think it would help if he was less dependent on boob for comfort in this way. You could check out the gentle removal plan here for starters (it can be applied to older nurslings):
https://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=52857.0
You may need to substitute a few extra cuddles at other times as the weaning process goes on.

A lot will also depend on how verbal he is e.g. whether you can negotiate around nursing such as asking him to wait/offering a substitute or distraction. Can you offer exciting 'big boy' alternatives during nursing time such as TV/ new activities? I would also work on separating their nursing sessions so the eldest's eventually only becomes associated with a particular place - not the place where you nurse the 3.5 month year old.

The LLL board as mentioned have a weaning forum and a tandem nursing forum. You may find support in both places.
http://www.lalecheleague.org/vbulletin/

[jbepko]

WOW....way to go.....GOOD FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Agree with PP and the great website info (although I am not sure when you are going to have time to read that info!!). Agree with Emma about going slow with weaning older one especially with new little brother around.