DS waking up all night

[Petra-Kate]

We need some help.  We do not know what we did wrong to cause this sudden change in sleep or what we are doing wrong to help DS to get back to sleep. DH and I are exhausted.

I have answered the questions in the sticky post below. In addition, I will tell you that with respect to night time sleep we have been pretty fortunate.  DS was colicky but during the afternoon and early evening.  He would settle by 8:00 pm and then would be fine for the rest of the night - waking for feedings and go right back down.  He started sleeping through the night with a dream feed at 12 weeks.  He dropped the dreamfeed on his own about a month or more ago.

We are having 2 problems.  First, what is causing DS to wake up? Second, what should we do to get the little guy back to sleeping through the night? As you will see below somethings have been changed in his eating and napping recently.  Napping is slowly getting better and nighttime sleeping is going to you know where. 
HELP!!!


How old is your child? 7 1/2 months

What’s his/her daily routine?

wakes between 5:20 am and 7:00 am, usually 6:00 am
E - 7:00 am
A - 7:30 - 9:30 am
S - 9:30 am-10:00/10:30 am

E - 11:00 am
A - 11:30 - 1:00/1:30 pm
S - 1:00/1:30 - 2:00/3:30 pm

E - 3:00 or 4:00 depending when he sleeps
A - from feeding until either 5:30 or 8:00 pm he often refuses to take a catnap
S - 5:30 if he cat naps

E - 7:00 pm
A - Bath
S - 8:00 pm

What’s nap routine?

Nap routine is to take him into his room when he starts cuing sleepiness.  Turn on sound machine and sit in the rocking chair and read books or sing until he looks really tired. We put him down - we try to put him down still awake.  We had major problems with naps a few weeks ago.  DH is a stay home dad and we fell into AP by letting DS sleep with Dad for naps.  When it began to effect his night sleeping, we worked hard to get DS back on track with naps.  Once we did this DS began sleeping better at night again.
 
How long are naps?

DS's morning nap varies between 1/2 to 1 1/2 hours.  We are trying wake to sleep to stretch this nap to 1 hour.  The afternoon nap ranges from 1/2 hour to 2 hours.  We are using wake to sleep on this nap too.  Most days he sleeps at least an hour at this nap. The afternoon catnap is usually a 1/2 hour when he has it.

What's bedtime routine? Time?

After bath, dress for bed then I sit in the rocker with DS and read/sing to him. I think put him down while he is still awake.  Most nights he settles himself.  Occasionally I have go back in after 20 minutes and resettle. On occassion if he is really tired he might fall asleep while I am reading to him = or more exactly he just suddienly collapses into sleep  on these occassions - going from fussy to asleep with a cry and sudden complete relaxation.  I try to watch for this kind of fussiness and get him into the crib before he falls asleep, but I don't always succeed.

Do you bottle or breastfed??

Bottlefed.

How much? or how long?

He has 5 1/2 ounces at 7:00 am, 4 1/2 ounces at 11:00 am, 4 1/2 at 1:00 or 2:00 pm, 5 1/2 at 7:00 pm

How many wakes per night?

DS was sleeping from 8:00 pm to about 6:00 am. over the last week he began waking first at 11:00 pm and over the last 3 days at 11:00 pm, 1:00 am, 1:22 am 5:30 am, 6:00 am.  When it was just 11:00 pm we could resettle him.  Now he it seems like he doesn't resettle.  He will seem like he is resettled but he starts crying before we get out of the room.

What’s your LO like when waking at night? How long is he/she up?

He is usually standing in his crib when we come in.  He is crying.  He stops crying when we pick up/put down - as long as we stay right there.  If we try to leave he starts crying before we get out of the room.  If we stay he starts crying after a minute to 2 minutes.

When you go to him/her is she fussing or crying? Or is it a mantra cry?

I do not know what a mantra cry is.  I think I should but I am so tired I can't remember. He is crying when go in. By morning I am crying.

What have you tried to settle??

We have tried to do pick up/ put down. Either we go in and say "its still sleepytime." and lay him back down with his pacifer or we pick him up and put him back down when he stops crying. We also stop talking to him after the first time we go in.

What do you do for A time and how long is it?

During the day he crawls all over the house exploring.  He visiits his great-grandmother and she plays with him.  We have started taking him for walks around 5:30 pm which seems to help with the catnap issue because he calms down.  Sometimes he even falls asleep at the end of the walk.

Are there developmental issues such as teething or milestones?

He has no teeth yet.  He appears to be teething - chewing everything and drooling. However, he has been like this for months.  About a week and half ago DS started vomiting his 7:00 pm meal.  Per the physician's advice we have limited this meal to cereal and formula. (He previously ate a stage 2 meal, a fruit and formula.) He has stopped vomiting at this feeding.  DS has acid reflux and has been on Axid for it since about 2 weeks old. A week ago he moved from having 3 doses a day to 2 doses a day per physician's advice because of the vomiting and the fact that he has been sleeping through the night.

Do they have a prop? If so what is it?

DS uses a pacifer.  We decided DH was a prop for naps and so have eliminated that "prop" =)  (see above regarding naps.)  We limited pacifer use from all day to just for sleeping. DS had acid reflux and colic - we did some AP during the worse of the colic - mostly dealing with naps.  We let him sleep wherever he would sleep - hence how he ended up taking naps with Daddy.  We have been working on eliminating the AP.  We knew we would have to do that.  The pacifer is (we think!) the last of the AP that still exists.

Do they have a lovie?

No but we have been trying to get him to have one.  The closest thing to a lovie is a Baby Einstein turtle doll that has teethers for feet. However, he doesn't seem to like to cuddle with it.

[Colin Macs Mom]

I'm so sorry that things have been so tough!   

At his age, he's likely ready or close to ready to drop a bottle. Since he's taking smaller amounts with each I suspect he's ready. I would suggest removing one (or trying to  ) and seeing if that increases his intake with the other three. Usually the third bottle of the day is first to go, but if something else works better for you that's fine too.

I also think it's time to drop the catnap. At his age I doubt he really needs it anymore and it's probably interfering with night sleep. I would guess he's taking it to make up for shorter naps during the day, which of course makes sense but not if it's making nights awful.

I do not know what a mantra cry is.  I think I should but I am so tired I can't remember. He is crying when go in. By morning I am crying.

A mantra cry differs from a regular cry in that it's very rhythmic, on a specific beat. It's LOs way of getting themselves back to sleep. If this is what he's doing as opposed to a real cry it's important that you don't interfere.

[Lucysmom]

Hi there -

Do you think he might be experiencing separation anxiety?  This is a normal developmental blip but it is hard to deal with for sure.  Is he more clingy during the day or crying during the day when he cannot see you or your dh?

I agree with dropping the catnap.  I would also stress that he really needs to be put in his crib completely awake and that at this age he needs to go through **ALL** of the stages of falling asleep on his own.  I ended up having problems with my dd when she was about this age or maybe a few weeks younger that she seemed to not be able to fall asleep on her own anymore and would cry when I left the room.  Well, it turned out that I was still treating her like an infant and waiting for her to get really droopy eyed and tired whilst sitting on my lap in the glider.  This was backfiring on me as she was ending up depending on me to get her into the first phase of sleep or even the second phase.  Once I started putting her down wide awake, her sleep improved greatly.  She did fuss at the beginning as she did not understand what this change was, but I would go back in if things escalated and would reassure her.

The other thing I can think of is something that you already mentioned in that he may indeed be teething.  We recently went through a period of nightwakings which is really unusual for dd these days and we had no clue why.  Well, lo and behold we got more teethies!  So we gave her a dose of Motrin before bed for a while and that seemed to have worked.  Maybe try to get a good look and feel and see if he has teeth coming.  If yes, I would definitely try some pain meds and I recommend ibuprofen (Motrin) over other pain meds.  It lasts longer and is an anti-inflammatory drug so that helps with the swollen, painful gums.

I hope that this helps a bit.  We're here to help and give out big {{{HUGS}}} whenever you need them!

[Petra-Kate]

Thank you both for your replies.  They really helped a lot.

It seems he is ready to drop a bottle.  We dropped a middle one and in the afternoon he took 6 1/2 ounces. He has also dropped the catnap. 

After reading a bunch of stuff on here and your posts, Hubby has managed to extend the morning nap to 1 hour and the afternoon nap to almost 2 hours. Yay!  Between dropping a bottle and the catnap...along with the longs naps, ds was much happier throughout the day.  He also ate better with less fussing.

As to separation anxiety - he seemed to go through that a few weeks ago and has seemed to figure out that we still exist when he can't see us.  He actually will crawl out of the room we are in to go play in front of the sliding glass doors in the kitchen and doesn't seem to mind that we are not in line of sight.

One thing that we have come to realize though is that our son is a candidate for Binky Anonymous. (Hello my name is Marius and I am a Binky addict....) When he wakes up he cannot got back down without the binky.  So now we are reading up on dropping the binky.  We are mortally terrified - terror seems to be the natural states of parents. But we are determined. We are trying to do it in stages since he is under a year.

Thanks again for the help!  It is invaluable.  I gained energy just reading the boards - I felt so much less isolated!

[Colin Macs Mom]

Glad that we could help    Don't worry about the binky, it's something that we all go through at one time or another. It might mean a rough day or two but the end result will be SOOO worth it!

[Petra-Kate]

update:

Well, yesterday was a huge setback. DS did ok for his first nap (58 mins with 1 resettling), and he ate well, so I was hopeful. By the afternoon nap though, things changed. He only slept for a half hour or so, would not settle back down no matter what I tried. He was cranky and whiney all afternoon. By the time Petra got home I was a wreck. DS ate well, but awoke shortly after 10pm. We had to go in and resettle/put him down for the entire night every 20-60 mins (varied). At times he went right back down, other times he was very awake and crying if we left his room.

I'm trying to gradually wean him from the binkey by not giving it to him until he's in the crib (used to give it when we started our quiet time in the rocker), and I go in at 20 minutes to take it out of hit mouth. Invariably he wakes up within 20 minutes (often only 5-6 mins later) and won't resettle w/o the bink. {oh man....he just managed to climb up onto the window seat, thats about 1 foot high} We're either going to have to go cold turkey soon, or get him about 50 binkeys to line his crib so we can get back to sleeping again.

Petra and I thank you all for the advice by the way.

-Nino (daddy)

[linfran]

My ds is the same age and teething has totally messed up his sleep patterns.  He now has six teeth (got the last three in the space of the last week) and every time he has been teething it's like the bodysnatchers took our happy smiley sleeps-all-night little guy and left a double who wakes up crying every hour on the hour and wants a  paci to settle (when normally he wouldn't bother with one at all.  Once the teeth come through he goes back to normal again....but it's damn hard..with these last teeth it has taken about three weeks to pop the little suckers through.

[Lucysmom]

Hi Nino -

Sorry you had such a rough night!    Like the previous poster said, it does sound like teething pain right now.  Maybe try giving him some pain meds if you find he is not settling and cranky.  Let us know how you're doing.  I am sending lots of sleepy, peaceful thoughts to Marius for you!

[Petra-Kate]

Update: The night before last was rotten.  He woke up all night long. We gave him infant's motrin and he slept for about 3 hours.  He just is having a rough time of it.  We are still working on the binky issue.  Although Wednwesday night I learned that as long as he can find a binky he replugs himself.  So we do think that it might be teething.  He certainly due for a tooth to come in. He will be 8 months on Tuesday.   

Last night was better.  He slept until about 2:30 am and woke up once.  The binkies had all fallen out of the crib. DH put one back into the crib and DS picked it up and put it in.  DS promptly fell over asleep with the binky.  I am so tempted to do as some friends have done - by 5 or 6 binkies and toss them into the crib.

[Colin Macs Mom]

I am so tempted to do as some friends have done - by 5 or 6 binkies and toss them into the crib.

that's what I did!! 

[linfran]

Just to update - ds has beenteething...4 in the space of a week....

[Petra-Kate]

Wow Linfran!  4 in a week!  Still no teeth for our DS.  He only woke up once at 1:40 am and he went down ok after a diaper change.  He woke up at 5:20 though.  After an hour we gave up on resettling him (he catnapped for 10 to 20 minutes and then want us again.  We went and got him and put him in our bed to play and relax for 20 minutes before we got up and the little guy promptly fell asleep for an hour!  Little booger!   

Naps and feedings have been going better and that seems to be helping.  Starting to wonder if the issue was a growth spurt and not teething.  Starting to wonder if the kiddo will ever have teeth.  I just hope he starts sleeping through consistently again soon.  It seems to be an every other or third night is rough...

Just taking it one nap at a time....

Thanks for the support.  It helps a lot to know we aren't alone and that things will improve (if nothing else he will go to college someday!)