Could you guys look at my routine and help tweak? N/W

[kc456]

I'm dealing with frequent night wakings, 3-4 per night, and that's in addition to a dream feed. I wonder if there's something in my routine that I can tweak to help baby sleep better at night -
- start the day at the same time every day?
- drop the dream feed? (Or is my dream feed too early? -- but that's when I go to bed, too tired to stay up past 10)
- not feed him every time he wakes up at night?
- is there a way to reduce the dirty diapers at night? (the diaper changes wake him up even more)

Some of the night wakings are not even nutritive, out of the past 7 days that I tracked, there were 3 wakings 1.5 hours after I fed him.

He sleeps and naps in his crib; the crib is in my bedroom.

Please let me know what you guys think.

Here's the info:
How old is your child? 3 mo 1 wk
What’s his/her daily routine? Please see pdf attached, roughly: wake up 7-7:30 AM, bed time 7-7:30 PM; 3 or 4 naps; eat every 2.5 - 3 hrs (on the document, the top rows are night feedings)
What’s nap routine? 3 or 4 naps
How long are naps? 45 min to 2.5 hrs, for a total of 3.5 to 5 hours during the day
What's bedtime routine? Time? Bath, nurse, put in the crib. If tired, falls asleep right away. If not, takes 15-30 min to self sooth (not crying)
Do you bottle or breastfed?? Breastfeeding
How much? or how long? How much -- I don't know, my breasts do not have ounce markings  , but he empties the breast pretty well. Feeding takes about 15  min -- he's pretty efficient
If breastfed.. one side or both?? (at each feed) - Most commonly, just one side
How many wakes per night? 3 to 4; occasionally, 2 but this has becomre rare now that we moved to an earlier bed time
What’s your LO like when waking at night? How long is he/she up? Wakes me up by stirring and grunting; acts hungry; eats and often poops, so we do a diaper change. The cycle takes about 30 min.
When you go to him/her is she fussing or crying? Or is it a mantra cry? Offer breast (he does not really cry, just stirs a lot)
What have you tried to settle?? Turn on hair dryer (on those occasions when it's been less than 2.5 hours since the last feed, and in those case hairdryer works). If it's been 3 hours since the last feeding, then the hair dryer does not work, and I have to feed him.
What do you do for A time and how long is it? Activity time is 1.5 hrs: eat, tummy time, play with me or toys; in the evening - bath. A time also includes about 15 min wind-down when I place him in the crib ahead of nap time.
Are there developmental issues such as teething or milestones? Not yet
Have you introduced cereal? Why, how much, and how many times a day? No
Do they have a prop? If so what is it? Pacifier
Do they have a lovie? We recently introduced a cloth napkin.

[*Kimberly*]

Answers to your questions:
   -Yes, start your day at the same time.  At least try to be consistant on what time he gets up and what time his first meal is.  I find that starting off the day the same really helps.
   -Your DF seems a little bit early.  It is usually between 10 and 11pm.  I would keep the DF but I would also be consistant with the time of the DF.
   -I would suggest not even going into his room at night unless he is upset or crying.  If all he is doing is moving around or making some noises, wait it out.  He may put himself back to sleep.  That said, if you do go in, don't feed him unless he is crying and nothing else has worked so you know it is hunger.
   -I leave my little one in his diry diaper at night.  For a while I was changing it at his DF but I stopped once he began to wake up when I did it and I just let him stay.  If the diaper is getting really full you might want to use a bigger size or a "night-time" diaper.  That said, my little one does not mind to stay in dirty diapers.  Hopefully not feeding him a bunch at night and maybe using a different diaper will help him to make it though the night on one diaper.

Other opinions-  I would try to make the rest of his day a little more consistant.  Try to keep his meals at roughtly the same time.  That should also help at night.  I remember in one of Tracy's books it talks about fixing the day before the night.  So I would start with waking up at the same time and doing the first BF at the same time and then go from there.

I hope that helps.

P.S. I thought I was anal, your baby schedule was awesome.  I mean that in a good day.  I loved it.  One thing I have learned though is to try to keep my analness at bay because it doesn't work with a little one.

Kimberly
Brendan's Mom

[kc456]

Kimberly, thanks for the great suggestions!

I stayed up last night and gave him his dream feed at 10:15, which I think really helped. His naps are much better today too.

He woke at 1:15, 4:15, and 5:30. I fed at 1 & 4, but not at 5:30 awake time. I reswaddled him and turned on the hairdryer, and he went back to sleep. I realized I automatically fed him the earlier two times, and that I should try other things first.

I think I also found the cause of his frequent pooping -- dairy in my diet. I ate none yesterday, and the night was completely poop free!

Starting the day at the same time is another thing I want to implement. I had the alarm set for 7 AM but he woke me up by stirring and pooping in his crib at 6:45. It looks like he's settling for 7 AM, 10 AM, and 1 PM feeds so far. I'll try to aim for these times.

This was very helpful! I feel like I'm on the right track.

I've attached the updated routine.

Another question -- would it be better to try eliminate 1 AM or 4 AM feeding first? Or keep both since he's only 3 months?

[*Kimberly*]

It looks like he is on about a 3 hour schedule, which is exactly where he should be. 

At three months my son was only eating once at night.  The first night feed that he dropped was the 1am feed.  For a while he still needed to eat at about 4am.  From that point he just graduadly increased it until 5am, then 6am, then 7am, the 8am, and then back to 7am which is the beginning of his day currently.  I liked 8am but 7am works too.  So I would suggest cutting out the 1am feed and seeing if he can make it until 4am.  Hopefully the dreamfeed will help eliminate the 1am feed.  I am glad to hear that you have solved the pooping problem.  Have you talked to your doc about your little one having some problems with milk? 

I think you are doing great.  It will be amazing how quickly he adapts to the routine and he will love it because it will help him to know when to expect things.

I hope tonight goes well.  Let me know.

Kimberly

[kc456]

Thanks for the feedback!

Last night went pretty well given that I'm just beginning to implement the changes. I fed him last at 6:30 PM, and he went to sleep at 7:30. He woke up at 9:30 -- 3 hours after the last feeding, like clockwork! But I was able to soothe him back to sleep. Dream feed was at 10:30.

He woke up at 1:30, and I used hairdryer and pacifier to calf him down, and I ran the hairdryer continuously until he woke up at 4. At this point I fed him and changed diaper, and he was back to sleep at 4:30 AM. Woke up at 6:45 AM, first feeding at 7:00 AM.

So the lesson for myself is that he does not really need the 1 AM feeding, and I was just responding to him as if he were still a newborn.

I spoke to his pedi, and he said that 8-9 dirty diapers was not normal for his age and that it could be milk protein intolerance. He advised to go off dairy for two weeks, and then reintroduce and see what happens. It's a bummer because I love yogurt and it's a good source of protein, too. On the other hand, I'm already eating gluten free (I have gluten intolerance) and consuming very few processed foods, so it would be simply cutting out yogurt, cheese, and butter. It's not like I have to overhaul my whole diet. He's doing much better already -- dirty diapers are much reduced, even though I slipped yesterday -- ate butter (duh!) and I also found out that my calcium chews have dry milk in them.

Plan for tonight is to deal the same way with 1 AM waking. And if I'm able to soothe him, then delegate to DH for the following night, so that I can get some sleep!!

[*Kimberly*]

Awesome!  It looks like your little one is doing great.  Waking up after the three hours is pretty normal.  He is just not used to sleeping though the night yet.  Now that you have a routine, it should be easy for hubby to take over and help.  My hubby did well with the DF's because they were so simple.  Hopefully, you will eventaully be able to stop using the dryer to help him go back to sleep.  It will probably take a little bit just because he is used to it.  To help my little one I used different background noise cd's.  I have one that is the sound of a heartbeat and one that is nature noises.  He liked the heartbeat cd the best.  You can also try the shush/pat and pu/pd.

I am sorry about the milk protein intolerance.  Is that something he will grow out of?  Brendan is on a no bananna and only whole grain diet right now because he has had a ton of problems with constipation.  It does make things a little more difficult when feeding him.

Good luck tonight!

Kimberly

[kc456]

Last night was interesting.

Last feeding was at 6:15 PM, and he was asleep at 7:15. Did not wake up around 9:30 like last time (yay!), and the dream feeding was at 10:30.

He slept through the 1 AM feeding! That was great, but he woke up at 3:15 so I fed him. I should have tried to hold out until 4 AM, because he was up at 6 AM (3 hours after a feeding), rooting and obviously hungry, since holding him or hair dryer did not work, and pacifier only upset him. So I gave him about 1/2 feeding at 6:15 AM, which messed me up as I slept through the alarm at 7, and fed him at 7:30. (At least after 6 AM feeding he did not act like it was time to get up, and went back to sleep.)

This is looking encouraging, although I'm not sure how skewed the results are because he was at day care for 1/2 day yesterday, and did not nap there well in the afternoon: skipped early afternoon nap, and only napped for 45 min from 4:30 to 5:15 PM, so he was pretty wiped out when he went to bed.

Oh, and the pooping situation continues to be much improved, yesterday last dirty diaper was at 1 PM, and he went for 14 hrs without pooping after that! I think it's contributing to him sleeping better at night.

This night I will try to hold out until 4 AM, so that his next feed will be at 7 and he can be up for the day. If I can get to this schedule, that would be great!

The milk protein intolerance is something they do grow out of; I've not looked into that in detail yet, but it seems to go away in their 2nd year.

[*Kimberly*]

Awesome.  Don't feel bad about having to adapt because you fed him a little earlier.  I think that feeding him a little at 6am and then letting him go back to sleep worked great.  The main thing is to try to get him back on schedule by the end of the day so that he can end it well and be back on track for the next day.  You cannot imagine the way some of our days have gone, really crazy schedules.  But I always try to get his last feed and bedtime the same (and the DF when he was on it) and that seemed to set him up to be okay for the next day.

I am so glad that his BMs are better.  Maybe he could send some of them this way, Brendan could use them.  I am also glad to hear that the milk protein intolerance is something that he will grow out of.  I know some people live with a milk allergy of some kind all their lives, but he has so many more options for food without it.  Yea.

Kimberly