DS is having 5 45 minutes naps every day....

[kbella]

DS will be two months tomorrow.  She sleeps well at night (about 11-12 hours), but during the day? Oy, she sleeps horribly.   Here is an example of our day today:

Wake up 7:55
Eat and Activity
Nap 9:00
Wakeup 9:45 - Try to get back to sleep, no luck
Bring her out of room around 10:30
Eat and Activity
Sleep 11:30
Wake up 12:00  - Try to get back to sleep, no luck
Eat around 12:45/1 p.m.
Activity
Sleep 1:30
Wake up 2:30 - - Try to get back to sleep, no luck
Eat again around 3:00/3:15
Try to put down around 3:30, falls asleep (this time on bottle) around 4:20 after ssh/pat, burping, etc.

She's down now but who knows for how long.  I think it took so long last time to put her down is because she's overtired.  I'm at my wits end, I don't know what to do.  Do I extend activity time?  Am I putting her down too late?  I've been setting my timer for 30 minutes and going in to try to do the wake/sleep method but it doesn't work on her.  I moved her yesterday, she woke up slightly then when right back to sleep.  10 minutes later she was up and screaming (45 minutes on the dot).  Today rather than move/awaken her, I thought I would just rub her when the jolt hits or when she starts to move around the 40 minute mark, didn't work (though I think that's why she slept 1 hour instead of 45 minutes - possibly).

What am I doing wrong?  I need some help.  I go back to work in three weeks and I'm worried how she'll be for my mother-in-law with the horrible napping, not to mention dependency on the bottle as a prop to fall asleep for naps (she seemed to go straight from paci as a prop to bottle).

[cathbilson]

Hi there.
First thing to mention is that your first awake period seems really short - only 1 hour and 5 mins?
I have always found the first nap to be the most important one. If the first nap was rubbish the rest of the day just went to pot. If she's not tired enough at that first nap, she will only sleep 45 minutes and then won't want to go back down.
Try for nap at 9.15. She will probably only go 45 minutes and then wake up, but you mgiht have a slightly better chance of getting her down, even if only for another 20 minutes or so.
Wake to sleep didn't work for us either. Holding through the jolt sometimes did, what I found was that I rarely managed to be in his room on time, so I would race in after the first noise, pop his dummy in and hold him still (one arm across legs, one across arms and chest) even though he was swaddled, this helped calm him. He usually dropped right back off. I still do the same thing even though he's not swaddled any more.
And I'm sorry to have to tell you that even though he's almost 5 months, we're still battling 45 minute naps at least some of the time, and his nights have been rubbish recently as well. What I foudn was there was a period between about 3 and 4 months when everything settled down and I thought 'oh, I've got the hang of this' and then it all went horribly wrong...
Things are improving now though!
My mum said something very wise, she told me not to expect too much of myself or DS in the first six months, just try not to do any AP - or anything that would set me up for trouble later - and rest when I can.
Good luck.

[*Natasha*]

Agree with pp the 1st awake time isn't very long and she may not be tired enough for a long nap only a 45mins catnap. Then by the next nap is probably overtired. Try extending the awake time 5-10mins at a time until you find something that works. You may have more success extending the nap if she wakes after 45mins if she is still tired enough to sleep longer. HTH

[kbella]

Okay, I'll try that.  However, one last question for clarification.  While I wrote that her sleep time is 9:00 a.m. she isn't actually napping yet, that's when we start the winddown routine (changing diaper, turn on noise machine, sing song).  She probably doesn't fall asleep until 9:15 (if I'm that lucky, other times it could be half an hour before she's asleep).  Does that count as activity/awake time?

[rinajack]

If they aren't asleep it is A time albeit low key.

Has your lo always short napped?  After the first short nap do you watch tired signs or try to stick to schedule? Because whilst your first A time seems to short, your other A times seem a bit long for her age.  Maybe at the moment, (watching cues of course, this is just a guide), aim to have her fall asleep 1.5 hrs after she wakes each time.  So start your wind down a good 15 mins before that.

[kbella]

Her awake times are longer in the afternoon b/c she naps so short and I'm worried if I put her down too long that she won't sleep.  It's a vicious cycle.  I know she's supposed to stay in the room/crib during her naptime but that's not always easy because of my four year old.  One time I got her back to sleep, took 30 minutes and she woke up after 5.  Soooo frustrating.  I never had this issue with my son.

[rinajack]

Have you considered that 45 is all the lo needs?  And that 5 of them each day is OK?

My lo woke happy from naps and stayed awake for a full A time, and she only napped 45 mins, did not get longer til she was about 5-6mo.  In BWSAYP Tracey acknowledges that this is true for some babies and if they are happy and not cranky and tired then you actaully don't have a problem to fix (except short times for you lol).  If you lo sleeps 45 and then is fine for 1.25-1.5 hrs then that is all he needs.  Those A times are appropriate for the age.

If what I said above it true, it will be much less stressful for you to accept it.  if it is not, then continue to work on naps.

[kbella]

Hmmm, I'm not sure.  The reason I think that she needs to sleep longer is because she's quite cranky and you can tell very tired with so many short naps.  Yesterday after her failed second nap, I brought her downstairs with me and she fell asleep in my arms for two hours.  Bad I know, but I was desperate.  So I know that she needs to sleep and would do so if I held her (she *has* slept in her crib for 3 hours twice unless they were flukes).  I guess it's just something I need to be consistent about and hope that she'll outgrow this.  Tonight I grew frustrated when she wouldn't calm down so I walked away and she cried for a minute and then went to sleep, so maybe I need to give her a little more time to figure out how to self-soothe herself.  Thanks for trying to help me.  You guys understand what I'm going through, hubby comes home and thinks I'm lucky to be home all day, that I've got it made. 

[rinajack]

I think you just said something I can help you with.  To this day, my lo get put in her cot then I just walk out.  I wait until she starts to cry (this can take a while, she talks or moans, and I wait for it to start to escalate, not always to a cry but to mean "I need you"), then I return, pop in the dummy, and by then she is ready and goes to sleep.  If I try to encourage her to sleep she gets furious.  If I stay in the room she chats to me.  She needs some time to work the energy out of her system before she will sleep.  As we continue doing this, sometimes she just talks or moan and then goes to sleep and it doesn't escalate (she just did this for the nap she is having now ).

Maybe try this kind of approach a few times and see if it works for you.

[kbella]

Well, today is much different than yesterday.  She was up about an hour before I started the nap/winddown  routine.  She started crying once I started singing.  I settled her down and put her in her crib.  She was furious with a capital F.  I picked her up once more and then decided to use the sleep positioner to prop her on her side - she prefers her right side.  She cried again, I tried to calm her down, didn't work.  I decided to just sit there and see what happens.   She cried for about three minutes, gave some vicious sucks on her fingers (weaned from the pacifier last week), and fell asleep.  That was 75 minutes ago - wooooo.  I hope this isn't a fluke.  I guess maybe she's a bit of a cryer and needs to do so to calm down.  So weird.

[rinajack]

I know, dd used to cry before every nap no matter what I did.  It is much less now though.

Hope she keeps up the good naps for you.