moved to the big girl bed... now she knows she can get out!

[Lilah'sMommy]

In preparation for the arrival of Lilah's baby sister, we successfully transitioned Lilah to her big-girl bed without a hitch about 3 weeks ago.  For 3 weeks, she hadn't yet figured out she could get out, it seemed... she'd call for us to come get her in the morning, and she'd just talk and play in there before nap and bedtime until she fell asleep.  But just a few days ago, she figured out she could get out!!  Bed time hasn't been too affected, as she doesn't seem to want to get out of bed when it's dark in her room, but we've had some issues with nap-time... one day it took her 1.5 hours to actually go sleep, and another she skipped the nap entirely, and kept screaming for us to come in (we close her door and have since she was very small, as we live in a small apartment and this greatly cuts down on the noise in her room).  Is this a phase that will pass?  It seems already that naps are going better... but how do I handle it if we have the same problem again?  I want to be prepared!

[james030405]

Hi Sabrina

We too moved james into a big bed in preparation for his new sister and for a few other reasons.  He was 16mths at the time and at the beginning he also didn't realise he could get out.  We decided to move him also because of several night wakings which has now resolved and also because he got out of his cot.

We were doing gradual withdrawal with him but when he started to wake at 3:45am in the morning we decided to do a variation of WI/WO.  We would stand beside his bed and cuddle for a couple of minutes and then place him down and walk out.  This of course started with screaming when we closed the door. Instead of going back in to him, we waited until he came and opened the door.  This was usually only about 30sec to a minute after closing.  We would then take him back to his bed, telling him that we would be just outside.  The first night continued for about 1hr.  The next day at nap I did the same thing and it only took around 20mins.  The 2nd night I think took about 15mins.  In the end it only took about 3 days in total and so far we haven't had any walk outs.  We also use this for early morning wakings.  We have got to 5am which is good and anything earlier he gets taken back.  I did make sure for about a week after starting this when I heard him waking up either from nap or in the morning, that I was standing out the front of his door so he thought I was always there. 

Things have greatly improved and also this is the exact way to do WI/WO, it definitely worked for us.  I hope this helps you. 

Lisa

[mattandcindy]

Hey Sabrina
We also moved Abigail to a big girl bed at 16 months due to me being pregnant. Exact same thing as you-she was fine for about a month and then the wake ups and walking out of the room started. We tried the WI/WO for a few days with no improvement (we actually did it once 40 times in a row without success).
What we had to do (which actually sounds mean but it worked) is "lock" her in her room. When we would hear her get up and get out of bed we would race to her door and hold it shut when she tried to get out of the room-she realized she couldn't get out and went back to bed. We had to do this for naps and morning wakings for about 2-3 days and now she doesn't get up anymore. She still does seem to sleep less than she did in her crib but now she will stay in her bed until we come get her.
Also, {{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}} to you. I remember being pregnant and so tired and not wanting to deal with a toddler who isn't sleeping...don't give up, it all works out eventually.

[Katet]

We put a "night" light on a timer in his room & when it comes on he is allowed to come out...still works a treat... we'd just say "is the fishy light on" (aquarium night light) & if it wasn't he had to go back to bed... then it wasn't us controling it but the light
We are about to move Liam to a bed (so tall) & on my shopping list is a light for him

[Lilah'sMommy]

Great idea, Kate!  I was trying to think of a timer-type solution, but I definitely don't want any ringing or anything, in case she actually does go to sleep... I'll keep this in mind if we start having trouble with naps again.

[Pigeon]

Hi Kate, I know you're in Australia, but was wondering where you got your light from? Think it would be very useful in our DD's case too, as she will lie in bed at 6.30 am  and shout "is it morning yet!" at the top of her voice. We make a policy of not getting her up until 7 am but I'm fed up of having to go into her before then and saying "its not morning time yet, we will come and get you when its morning time".
A light could work wonders for us! (She has a clock, but can't tell yet tell the time)

[xxkaty23xx]

With Mikey, we had the same problem, so eventually with nap times i started giving him a book and he would ''read'' it and he would usually fall asleep doing that, i let him choose the book he wanted and then he'd go up to bed, i think he liked it because he had something to do other than just lay there but it wasnt exciting enough as to keep him awake iykwim, the timed light is a great idea though!

[Katet]

Laura, I got it at a $2 shop, but they don't sell them there anymore & I am about to hunt for one for ds#2 thinking of looking in a lighting shop & also maybe a toy shop... I have a friend who uses a "Lava lamp" & her almost 2yo wakes up & waits for the bubbles & lies there for ages watching them