Author Topic: Separation Anxiety  (Read 1033 times)

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Offline John_Henry

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Separation Anxiety
« on: December 01, 2006, 17:58:23 pm »
OK.  We have a 13.5 mo spirited boy.  He usually sleeps through the night from 7:30 pm to 7:00 am, with one 1.5-2 hr nap starting around 11:30 am.  He has been a really good sleeper of late.  We have changed nothing in his routine.  HOWEVER, all of a sudden, he seems to have developed a serious case of separation anxiety.  He has had a mild version of it for some time, but not like this.  During the daytime, it's not a "problem", as cuddling him and playing with him will alleviate the screams.  HOWEVER, for his naptime and night-time sleeping, what used to work all of sudden doesn't.  Typically, we rock with him in the chair, and then put him down awake.  For his naps he would usually fall asleep within 15 minutes, and at night, he usually falls asleep almost instantaneously.  For his naps, before he falls asleep, he usually makes some noise, but happy noises.  At night, he usually silent before sleeping. 

NOW, he screams bloody murder, at naptime and night-time, at the slightest indication that we are about to leave the room (once we've put him down).  Last night, through patting his back, I was finally able to get him to fall asleep (around 9:00), after which I crept out of the room.  He woke at 5:20 am, and would not go back to sleep, screaming, until we took out of the crib at 7:00.  We went in ever 5-10 minutes or so to try to calm him down.  And he calmed down immediately, until, again, we showed the slightest indication of thinking of leaving.  And then he lost it again.

My wife is now apparently trying to get him to take his nap, with the same type of results.  Crazy mad screams...

This is totally out of the blue.  He was fine.  What have others done in this situation?  What would you do?

Thanks for any help...

Offline imsmum

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Re: Separation Anxiety
« Reply #1 on: December 01, 2006, 19:32:45 pm »
Well, first off you want to rule out any physical problems like ear infections or teething etc.  Another thing is that he might not be as tired as when he first transitioned to one nap so he may need his nap pushed back a bit (athgough with the early waking you might want to hold off opn that a bit).  Around that age I found I had to let my dd wind down a bit more in her crib so I had to put her in before she was really tired, otherwise I would disturb her drifting off process and do the same thing, scream until I stood there until she fell asleep but then because she fell asleep when she was overtired would wake up early.

Offline pleballois

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Re: Separation Anxiety
« Reply #2 on: December 02, 2006, 19:11:57 pm »
Hi,

Just to let you know that we have experienced similar from time to time - as far as we can conclude it is down to teething/pain- standing up and playing in the day they either don't notice the pain or it is not as bad.  As the previous respondent said, ear ache or teething could be the cause as this would be worse lying down.  We usually give a good dose of pain relief before bath so that by the time it has come to pyjamas and bed the pain is relieved and they can settle.
Hope this helps - we are having the same problem at the moment!

Offline mari

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Re: Separation Anxiety
« Reply #3 on: December 02, 2006, 19:22:00 pm »
When this was happening to my LO I moved her nap time a little later 12.30 - 2.30pm.  This way she was a little more tired for her nap and slept longer and wasn't overtired for bed, it's still working for us, (most of the time!) you could try it to see if it might help a little.

It is hard when they are up early, to keep them awake, but that's what I had to do to get her back on track.

Offline John_Henry

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Re: Separation Anxiety
« Reply #4 on: December 03, 2006, 17:52:49 pm »
Thank you all for your comments.  However, our son is not teething.  And I do not think he has an ear ache.  He simply freaks out when we leave the room.  All of a sudden.  He is a little better the last couple of days with naps.  However, the nights are worse.  We are able to get him to sleep with several rounds of the pat/shush thing.  However, it seems that at the times when he normally would have briefly opened his eyes and rolled over back to sleep in the past, he now opens them, realizes he is alone, and freaks...followed by more pat/shush...several times throughout the night.  It simply seems like this is our lot until he moves on to the next developmental stage.  Please, God, soon!

If anyone has any recommendations on how to deal with separation anxiety, please let us know.  And thanks again to all who have responded so far.