What time should 2mo go to sleep?

[Alenka]

My ds is 2 mo and over 12lb. We have a 3 – 3.5 EASY routine: the day starts at 8 am, he stays awake for about 1 hour – 1 hour 40 minutes (every time deferent), then sleeps for 1.5- 2 hours. The problems start at night – he eats (somewhere between 6.30 – 7.30), has a bath, goes to sleep, sleeps for 20-40 minutes and then wakes up and stays awake for 1-5 hours. Sometimes cries, sometimes not. When we get tired of sitting with him in his room we take him in the living room where he quietly sits in his bouncer and seems to be happy. We keep lights off and everything is very quite so it’s not really an activity for him. He just sits and looks around. If we try to put him back in his crib after some time, he starts crying again. Sometimes, if he cries, we hold him and he fells asleep on our arms….Tonight  I put him in the crib and he was lying down looking at the ceiling with no intention to sleep. After 40 minutes he became fussy so I gave him the paci and he lied down for another 40 minutes or so…

He started acting like this about 3 weeks ago. We can have 1 or 2 “good” nights when he stays asleep (even though he cried before for 20-40 minutes) and then we have 3 or 4 “bad” night when he is awake for 2-5 hours!

So my questions are:
- If he doesn’t want to sleep at 7-8 pm, should we still force him? May be try to put him to sleep at 9 or 10? What problems might we have if we do so?
- Should I change anything in the routine? He shouldn’t be overtired since he has at least 2, sometimes 3 good naps during a day. I tried not to bath him and had the same result, so it’s not about the bath making him overtired…
- Should I cut on his day naps? Overall he sleeps for 4-5 hours during a day.
- Should I keep everything as it goes and assume that all babies don’t want to sleep at night? Is it what they call “colic”? Did anybody straggle with it at his age? And if did, for how long can it last and should I do anything about it?

Thanks!

[angelina and andrew's mum]

can u post us ur routine.

[Alenka]

Hi there,

The routine is approximately like this:

E 8.00
A
S from 9.30

E 11.00
A
S from between 12.30 and 13.00 (depends on how long he can stay awake)

E between 14.00 and 14.30
A
S from 15.30 – 16.30 (sometimes he is awake for 1 hour, sometimes for 1h 40 min)

E between 17.30 and 18.00
A Bath
S from between 19.00 – 20.00

Then wakes up or doesn’t fall asleep.
From  20.00 – 24.00 eats once or twice, depends if he is sleeping or not.

From 24.00 – 8.00 eats twice, every time at different time.


If he wakes up from his nap about 2.5 – 3.5 hours after the last feed, I feed him. If earlier, I soothe him and he goes back to sleep. If he doesn’t wake up by himself, I wake him up in 3 or 3.5 hours after the last feed (depends, if he didn’t sleep good I let him sleep some extra)

[angelina and andrew's mum]

hi, i have to admit my dd was all over the place at 2 months-it does get easier. ive had a look at ur routine- 1hr 40 seems a bit long for a 2mnth old. could it be that ds needs to be on a 2.5 easy-i have found this on another post-just to give u an idea:

i did not find Baby Whisperer until dd was 2 months old so it took a while to get onto an EASY routine.  This was my ideal schedule at 2-3 months when it worked out.

E 7:00am
A
S 8:15

E 9:30
A
S 10:45

E 12:00
A
S 1:15

E 2:30
A
S 3:00

E 5:00
A
E 7:00
S 7:30 bed

E 12:30ish
S
E 3:00ish
S
E 5:30ish
S
im on a 3hr schedule and dd is 4 mnths tom so u have to go with what easy suits ur baby. is ur wake time in the morn always 8am or does that change?

[rebecaq]

Hello! Welcome to BW  

At 2 months babies are still getting the hang of a routine and still hit a few bumps in the road. Hang in there, it will get sorted out soon.

Does he catnap at all? I think that may be a good part of why he's having trouble falling asleep at night. He may be overtired. At his age he should be on 3 hour EASY which looks like this :

3-hour EASY:

E: 7.00 wake up and feed
A: 7.30 or 7.45 (depending on how long feed takes)
S: 8.30 (1.5hr nap)
Y: your choice
E: 10.00
A: 10.30 or 10.45
S: 11.30 (1.5hr nap)
Y: your choice
E: 1.00
A: 1.30 or 1.45
S: 2.30 (1.5hr nap)
Y: your choice
E: 4.00 feed
S: 5.00 or 6.00 or somewhere in between – catnap (approx. 40mins) to get baby through the next feed and bath
E: 7.00 (cluster feed at 7 and 9 if going through a growth spurt)
A: bath
S: 7.30 bedtime
Y: the evening is yours
E: 10 or 11pm dreamfeed

Allow me to answer your questions  

So my questions are:
- If he doesn?t want to sleep at 7-8 pm, should we still force him? May be try to put him to sleep at 9 or 10? What problems might we have if we do so?

I think it's important to put babies to bed early. It will set a good pattern for the rest of their lives. Plus, a baby so young needs his sleep very much. Remember to sleep is to grow.  

- Should I change anything in the routine? He shouldn?t be overtired since he has at least 2, sometimes 3 good naps during a day. I tried not to bath him and had the same result, so it?s not about the bath making him overtired

I think a catnap might help him out alot. In fact it's the only thing I see that needs changing in your routine.?

- Should I cut on his day naps? Overall he sleeps for 4-5 hours during a day.

I don't think you need to cut on his naps. He's sleeping exactly the amount needed for his age. This I copied for the General Sleep FAQ's
1 month old:
Night: 8.75 hours;
Day: 6.75 hours - 3 naps, 2.25 hours each;
Total: 15.5 hours

3 months old:
Night: 10 hours;
Day: 5 hours - 3 naps, 2 naps of 1.75 hours and 1 of 1.5 hours;
Total:  15 hours

- Should I keep everything as it goes and assume that all babies don?t want to sleep at night? Is it what they call ?colic?? Did anybody straggle with it at his age? And if did, for how long can it last and should I do anything about it?

I think you need to tweak your routine regarding the catnap.  I also suggest that when he wakes and wants A time at night to not take him into the living room. He needs to be taught that nighttime is for sleeping. so by taking him out and putting him in his swing he's getting the message that there is A at night, even if it's low-key A. My recommendation is that you shh/pat until he drifts off again. He will probably give you some resistance and cry, but that's just because things are being done different. Not because he's mad at you

Let me know how you get on

- Beca

[Alenka]

Thanks everybody!  Our wake up time has always been 8am. I’ve started it like this from my selfish perspective – sometimes he wakes up at 7.30 and I can handle it. If he woke up at 6.30 it would be too much for me. I think, he already got used to this time. At least, several times I woke up at 8am and found him awake in his crib, laying down and looking around. 

I’ve also tried 2.5 routine but had the same result at night. The reason why sometimes we have 3.5 hours between feeding is that I try him to nap for at least 1.5 h. So, if he is awake for 1.5 h, needs 30 min to fall asleep, and sleeps for 1.5, it will give us 3.5h between feeding. However, he is often awake for only 1 hour. I also tried to put him to sleep earlier (after the first yawn) but he didn’t like it – he screamed and cried. If I put him to sleep a bit later he falls asleep much easier and often without my help. 

Beca, I guess you are right about the catnap. Actually, we sort of have it – after his bath he sleeps for 20-40 min. before he decides to stay awake I guess I just need to move his bath after the catnap and have the bedtime at 8.30 instead of 7.30 (since we start our day at 8 am). It should give him 11 hours of the night sleep. Will try it.

[rebecaq]

Alenka,

Let me know how it goes!

- Beca 

[teteali]

This is the exact same thing that has been happening with my 10 week old LO too!  I've posted about it before too, but still haven't gotten it right!  My schedule is exactly as you posted it should be but she still wakes up an hour after i put her down at 7:30 and then won't go back to sleep after i feed her at 8:30.  Sometimes she will catnap again for 40 min if we carry her around but then wakes up again.  I end up keeping her up until 10:30/11 to do the so-called "dreamfeed" and then try to get her to sleep after that.  By then she is overtired and struggles to go to sleep, but the last few nights has slept for 7 hours straight when she finally is down. 

I'm so happy to be having that long stretch of sleep after, but she is so fussy and miserable before that and it is really stressful.  She does not need much help to fall asleep during the day, and only cries a little bit at times for some naps, but nothing like this fussy time at night.  Any other suggestions?

Thanks!

[Alenka]

Hi there,

The catnap didn’t really help. Actually, right now he fights both -  the catnap and the “nighttime” sleep.  But overall things are getting better. He doesn’t stay up for several hours anymore, he just has hard time falling asleep and staying asleep (might wake up in 10 or 20 minutes and needs to be soothed). But as soon as he passes the 40 min. mark he will be sleeping all night long  (waking up only for feeding).

On the other hand, right when you think it works, everything changes – we started having trouble with the second nap. But I’m kind of get used to it already  to know that he needs me time to time to fall asleep   

Teteali, I don’t know what we can do to help our los sleep better. I guess, they are just babies and this is the way how babies work.  We just have to be patient and wait for things to improve (which I can see is happening). Btw, my lo started to have long 5-6 hors stretches at night as well!   

Also, I was wondering, if it says that 3 mo old needs 10 hours of night sleep… if my lo goes to bed at 7.30 and wakes up at 7 am, it will give us 11.5 hours of sleep, why so?

And one more question. My ds started waking up at 6am for feeding. To start out day at 6am is too early for me. But at 7 or even 8 am he is not so hungry and he is very-very sleepy. So, for the last two days I stared the day after 9 am. I’m very happy to sleep till 9am  and my ds seems to be happy too and not as sleepy as before. I know that it’s recommended for babies to wake up at 7am. But I don’t know why and I’m wondering what is wrong about waking up at 9