I'm back...what a mess!

[luvmykiki]

I cannot believe I'm posting again... I just want to type my issues out and see what I think..If anyone has any input I would love that .   I cannot believe that 15 months...still with sleep issues..mostly (all?) my fault!
I started PU/PD at 7.5months...WORKED SO GREAT. Had her sleeping from 6:30-5am with Dreamfeed at 10pm.  I dropped the dreamfeed at 11.5m (late, I know, but it was working!).  She slept without dreamfeed from 6:30-5 for about 2weeks and then we MOVED. UG.  It's been unreal ever since...this was sept. 30th.  My plan was to get her re-adjusted after the move and then work on the early wake up.  Naps have been good 1hr am, 2hr pm.  Goes down to sleep just fine.  Since the move she's gotten four molars and four "eye" teeth (still working on those!), she's had Coxsakie virus and TWO colds (all pretty much back to back), she's learned to walk, she's traveled to New York for a weekend (totally messed up trip as far as sleep goes)... She's been waking mostly around 3-4 each night, then sometimes it would be 2ish, then she started 9:30-10ish right before new years.... I 'fixed' that by PD but she's back at it.  I am SO tired that I have been completely UNABLE (er, unwilling  ) to 'sleep-train' .... I've (for the most part) been taking her to bed with me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Now I'm SO STUCK I don't even know what to do...I"m so afraid that she's in pain with the teething or too hot, or too cold or congested or WHATEVER that I just CAVE COMPLETELY.  Last week I was really working on getting her back on her 'schedule' and was having success until my girlfriend came over when she was asleep one night and had her 5month old with her...my LO heard that baby in the house and woke up and there was no way she was going to go back to sleep. I didn't know what to do!  I brought her down and she played...she was up a lot that night and had issues with naps the next day...the next night she slept through!!  I was so excited...then the night after that she slept through!!!!!!!!  SO excited.  Then the next night....up at 11.... (into bed with me..SHAME ON ME) then last night 10:30 (again with the shame on me).  Now I don't know what to do.... I just want to scream.  To make matters worse, my husband is out of state working for three months and we are supposed to travel to stay with him for about a month or so, departing in 2 weeks. So more upset to us!  Also, during this time we will travel (inside of the traveling) to our inlaws to visit for a few days where we will all be in one room (this is a nightmare for us as she ALWAYS wakes during the night when she's in the room with us!)
If you've read this far thanks.. I feel like such a loser...Can't deal. 

Susan and the LO with mother-induced sleep issues....................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[imsmum]

You poor thing!  I know how tough ti is when you are trying to deal with sleep issues and you just can't seem to catch a break.  First off, how is she sleeping when you bring her in with you--is she still waking early?  What time are her naps? 

Anyone who can help you with the sleep training ie.  even mind her a bit during the day so you could nap and then be able to do PD at night?

I guess before doing that you'll want to do things to reassure yourself she's not too hot, cold, congested, teething etc.  so try some pain meds before bed, raise the mattress head and put in a vaporiser and put on some warm sleepers so that she'll be warm even if she tosses the blankets off and you're good to go!

If you take care of those things and pd and she's still night waking you can try to rule out other causes, like she needs to go to one nap so her schedule is disrupting her sleep  etc.

Keep posting and let us know how things are going so we can support you along the way!

[JoC]

Hi, I know it sounds weird, but i was so glad to read your post.
We are in very similar situation with our 16 month old. Never a great sleeper, did pu/pd with great success and everything was great for a few months. Since christmas, all hell seems to have been let lose.
Similar scenario to you, ds had bad cold, then chicken pox, then chest infection now cannines coming through...on and on.
Mistakes were made (giving milk at 2 in morning, cuddling at 4am, bringing him into my room... )
I am back at work now full time til May (covering maternity leave!!!), and have averaged about 4-5 hours sleep for the last 4 weeks or so.

I know what i have to do...pd again for a week or so, but when you are SOOOO tired, it is just SOOOO easy to give in. I need strength.
Sorry to ramble on your post so long with no advice....but I know just how you are feeling....HUGS

Jo

[andibig]

susan
i can assure you that you are not the only one.i don't think i've actually had a full nights sleep for over 2 mths.started with a v.bad tummy bug.managed to get the NWs sorted she was sleeping through for a week and then she got a cold.plus shes teething on and off with 2nd yr molars (ugh!!!!).dd is 19mths btw
i also work fulltime working rotating shifts!!!
pls god 1 full nights sleep would be heaven!

[luvmykiki]

Wow, so thoughtful everyone!  I feel so much better..... it helps to hear I'm not alone (especially with babe in bed.... I know this a major crime but in the wee hours it's bliss to me! ...then the next night rolls around and I just want to shoot myself at those first cries). Anyhow, when she's with me she sleeps well still waking early though, like 4-4:30 then back to sleep (on top of me..), usually up again at 5:30 and *maybe* back to sleep until 6-6:30.  When she first wakes early in the morning she seems to want to be ALL over me for that last couple of hours of sleep....snotty nose and all.  It's damn cute, though, I will say...and I won't lose sight of the fact that she will be big girl soon enough!  As for naps, she is currently still taking 2, am is at (breakfast at 9-9:30 and is usually 1hr 15min or 1.5hrs.....lunch at 12:30-1ish and second nap at 2pm (ususally 1.5hrs)...Lately (not sure for how long....) she has been babbling a lot when first down for pm nap..then she'll fall asleep sometimes not until 3 or later...she just did this today and woke at 4:20.  This morning she also babbled through a lot of her am nap and then fell asleep at like 10:15...I was going to wake her at 11:30 and she was up.  Sorry this is confusing...it's confusing for me too!!!!  I feel SO messed up! Like I have no clue where to go from here!  PD at night? *and* at the early wake up?  Drop am nap?  Wow, i'm clueless.... Thinking of going away makes me absolutely nauseous!  Everyone else in my life is like "you're so lucky...you're free to visit a new part of the country and stay for a good chunk of time..then flit off to visit relative...so lucky".... I feel like screaming because they're right but I get sick when I think of it!!!!  So, you gather, I"m not working ...  I don't know how you working ladies are surviving...I don't think I'd have the strength day after day.  You must want to kill me with my whining!
As for help, I have my parents nearby.... my husband, when he was home, would take her in the a.m. and I would sleep.  My parents mind her when we're together (often) and that helps just so I can take my eyes off of her and do whatever (usually cook or clean or run an errand...)
Well, thanks again, SO much for listening and help.  I wish us all a LOT of sleep soon.  I always feel better when I have a plan...but I can't even come up with one right now.
I can NEVER type a short post...sorry...

~Cheers,
Susan

[mari]

Hi girls, I am sorry that you have had it rough lately, but stop feeling guilty for taking them into bed with you, we need our rest sometimes it's the only thing on our minds.  At least our lo's know that we love them!

Susan, I would Check your routine, ensure that naps are fine and she isn't ready to switch, she might be at this age, as she does seem to be taking the afternoon nap quite late.  I would use  PD until you go away.  When you go away, try to keep the routine as close as possible.  I don't knwo how long you are travelling for, but when I took Nathan to San Diego I tried to work out what time it was gioing to be when we arrived and tried to get his body clock working to that time as soon as possible after we arrived (it was much harder returning with the time moving forward, it even took me a month to get back in to it)  Travel does disrupt them, but try as best you can to stick to a schedule.
Ensure that she has enough blankets, isn't cold, the temperature for the room is ok, just to put your mind at rest.  Look out for signs of teething ie runny nose, sore nether regions, crying, and give meds.  If she is congested, I highly recommend a menthol plug in for the bedroom.
The latter I would say to Sashas mummy too.
JoC, I would start the sleep training with your lo on the weekend and get the help of dh during the week to help you, as she was an ok sleeper previously then I bet it won't take that long, go for it.

If it's any consolation, Christmas put our routines out and we are still trying to get back on track here.  For some reason Alex has taken to doing a poo at 9.15pm every night precisely!  Why?

[imsmum]

Susan--it sounds like you are stressed about the travel so maybe you would be better if you put off any sleep training until that is over with so that you can better focus.  The downside to that is that you probably will be more tired from the continued disrupted sleep and the travel.

[luvmykiki]

Hi again,
Updating..... Last night I gave ibuprofen at bedtime and she slept until 3am then in with me and woke at 4,5 and 6:30 for the day.  I've basically been doing 'observation' for the last few days/nights.  What I've gathered is that she is *definitely* getting a tooth on the bottom (it's just beneath the gums, runnyrunny nose, etc.).  I'm thinking that I'm not supposed to do PD (sleep training) when she's teething/illness/etcetc...is this true?  Oh: what is a menthol plug? can i get it in the us? will this help if her runny nose is teething related???

Second, something is up with her naps/routine....Maybe time to switch to one nap but I'm not sure how to go about this *at all*.  She is up at the same time daily (6-6:30) but when I've been putting her in for am nap (9am) she is playing longer (currently up there fussing right now- 9:30) and falling asleep later, hence waking later, and going in for second nap later (again she fusses/play for a while before falling asleep)...getting up at 4-4:30 (LATE!) and then going to bed 7-7:30 (our previous bedtime was 6:30-7ish).  She is still getting close to 3hrs of daytime sleep but seems *reluctant* to nap (for lack of a better word).

I will be traveling/away for 5 weeks (staying in a 2bedroom condo in Albuquerque New Mexico)....I'm thinking I should try and get her to nap in the pack'n'play a bit before we leave...She will be sleeping in it for the duration of the trip!  I'm terrified... Traveling alone too!

Thank you SO MUCH for any input....  

~Susan
FYI ...just about to click post and she's asleep ...it's 9:35 (so about 35minutes of fuss/play..not bad?) SO CONFUSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[mari]

http://www.pfizerch.com/product.aspx?id=498

This looks like a US site.  It just helps free the airwaves a little when they are stuffy.  Usually when DD is teething she has a runny nose but is rarely stuffed up IYKWIM, so not sure if it would help, it would certainly help with a cold though. 
There is a sticky about the transition 2-1 nap on the naps board, HTH.  Sorry this is short, have to get DS from school.  Will post later with more time.

[andibig]

susan
i agree with Mari.it definetely sounds like she needs to drop to 1 nap.Sasha was about 14-15 mths when she dropped down to 1.
Mari
Sasha is now completely over her cold .we are now having a bit of a growth spurt as she ate loads today.had to give her 2 snacks instead of her usual 1 plus her 3 main meals .the girl must have hollow legs-LOL
i'm working on cutting down her nap time as her morning wake up is getting earlier.its just a matter of time to get rid of the NWs.i did it last time after her tummy bug so i know i can do it this time.

[luvmykiki]

of course,,,,right when i'm sure it's time to drop to one nap she does 2 perfect naps today....it's 2:55 and she's up from her pm nap which she went down for at 1:30.  What gives?  Last night she went to bed later than usual (see previous post about late pm naps.....).  Shall I put her down late again tonight?  It was 7:30 last night...maybe I'll try that.
ug.

[andibig]

Susan
when sasha was dropping to 1 nap there were still days when she would need 2 naps.it takes a couple of mths to settle.other than that you could try and shorten her AM nap to 1hr.so maybe down at 9.30am and wake up at 10.30am

[luvmykiki]

Thanks so much for all the great advice!  What a fabulous sounding board....
Well, last night I made her bedtime later.  She woke from her nap at about 3 and I brought her up for bath/bedtime at 6:45..she was asleep by 7:15.  She slept until 4:45 (which is good for her!).  She woke at one point but went back on her own...I remember feeling groggy/asleep and thinking 'oh crap' but then I woke at 4:45 when she was really calling out...
1. I think her runny nose is teething related but I'm going to get the 'plug' for future use!
2. So nervous to travel but I think I'll try keeping her routine with short am nap and normal pm nap for now.  --> What do you think about my trying to 'cold turkey' switch to one nap while we're away since she'll be such a mess already?  I'm thinking this would backfire but I know she'll be NWing the whole time we're away anyway....One nap would be SO much better from my POV but I'm going to do what she needs me to!
I've been reading the sticky on the 2 to 1 switch...good information.  Lots of people in similar 'boats'. 
I'll keep you posted....
thank you!

[imsmum]

I wouldn't try the 2 to 1 switch while you're away--they are usually super tired and need to go to bed much earlier which would likely interfere with any evening activities/visiting.  I'd try to do it when you come back when it won't matter so much if she needs to go to bed at 6.

[JoC]

Hi Susan,
I switched from 2 to 1 nap in a very short time with my ds when he was only 12 months. He started napping REALLY badly for both naps so one day i just kept him up til 12 and put him down, he slept for 2 hours and continues to to this day I have to wake him sometimes as he would carry on). This may have been a fluke, but just what happened to us.
Good luck with the travelling x
Jo