18 mo eater don't know what else to do!!! PLEASE HELP...(long)

[Sabine]

My 18 mo (27 1/2 lbs) old has always been picky.  He used to eat the same for breakfast/lunch/supper everyday for the last 3 months.  Recently he has improved with respect to variety but not by much.  This is what he usually eats:

breakfast---1/4-1/2 Nutrigrain waffle, dried cereal and pear or banana occ yoghurt plus milk 8oz in cup
snack--pears or banana, breadstick or rice cracker and/or dried blueberries
lunch-- egg, toasted pita, apple/yoghurt or if not egg will have ham/turkey breast, sometimes will eat homemade pizza
snack--fruit either apple/pear and yoghurt maybe few cheddar crackers plus milk in cup 3oz
supper--either pizza, breaded fish, chicken fingers (homemade), BBQ chicken or egg plus peas/corn, pita or potato wedges, yoghurt, applesauce, homemade oatmeal cookie
milk before bed 5oz

In b/w he will have water too. The only fruit he will eat is apple/pear/banana and dried blueberries.  Have tried numerous times with melon, strawberries and grapes plus others but ends up smushed on the tray or on the floor.

This is the problem I didn't know how to deal .  Today at lunch we made him a sandwich of turkey and cheese on a croissant.  He has eaten this before and he refused.  HE cried and balled.  WE (DH and I) said "no this is all there is for lunch".  and he got so upset to the point he was heaving and vomitted a small amount.  I felt so horrible so offered something I thought he would eat ( I know bad mommy) and he ate it.  He has done this once or twice before and I just hate to see him act this way.  I know I am catering to the behaviour too but DH and I want it to stop...but how?

1) How do we deal with this if it happens again?  Give in or put him to bed hungry?  What if he gets upset to the point of throwing up...do I let that just happen and hope he will learn? (seems traumatic to me but hey I will do whatever I can to get past this).

2) He also doesn't use a fork at all...spoon yes for yoghurt and applesauce but no fork.  I love stews and pastas but he won't even try.  I have abandoned giving him a bowl with his own b/c he just stabs at it with the fork and pushes it away.  I have tried for weeks on end and just find it is a waste.  How and when will he learn to use the fork?

Please help!!  I am desperate.

Sabine

[Sabine]

Thanks!  I'm with you I can't be that rigid and I certainly don't want to turn him off food or make meals a traumatic experience either.

Thanks again for the advice.

Sabine

[Two mummies]

Sabine I totally sympathise!!!

Our 18 month old is exactly the same! Last night I tried pasta with cheese sauce...was happy trying the cheese sauce but as soon as I slipped a piece of pasta in we had total meltdown...full tearful episode.

I think she thinks pasta comes straight from the devil!!!!

Riley will also refuse to eat most new foods. At then end of the day if she refuses to eat any of her dinner (old favorites not new stuff) we call it quits and figure she isn't hungry enough. Its tough because you feel like a bad Mummy putting them to bed on an empty stomach but you have to believe that if they were hungry they would have eaten.


It is hard to keep up with offering her new foods at every meal as it seems such a waste of food and effort but I guess we should be doing more of it.

Soph

[Katet]

I'm thinking wow I wish both my boys ate that much at the toddler stage...actually even my preschooler is only eating about that much variety.

Food rule in our house.
This excludes Breakfast which they pretty much eat the same thing.
Food gets put on the plate 4-5 things different colours & shapes & includes 1 will pretty much always eat, one sometimes eats, 1 new & 2 what ever I have to fill up the quota.

Then what ever gets eaten gets eaten... "it is the parents job to provide healthy nutritious food, it is the childs job to decide if & how much they will eat"

If they are hungry say between Lunch & Afternoon tea, they get offered any leftovers from lunch or if their arent any, fruit, which would be part of afternoon tea.

Yep I have wastage, but no we don't have dramas.
BTW neither of my boys let me feed them AT ALL, so trying to hide something on a spoon or force feed wouldn't work
Also I apparently on ly ate, peas, custard, cheese, sausages, mash, bread & butter/toast & fruit when I was a toddler... now I pretty much eat everything (not big on peas, mash or sausages now though  )

[Sabine]

Glad to hear I am not alone.
I guess I won't make meals a struggle and won't feel bad if nothing is eaten...he won't starve, right?

thanks mommies.

sabine

[Katet]

In the last 2 weeks Liam has gone to bed on "sparrow meals" (ie  bite each meal) at least 4 times & sometimes he wakes & wants breakfast straight away, but mostly he just goes into a new day.
They also slow down their growth once they go through the growth spurt that follows learning to walk (legs getting a bit longer) so around 18mo +/- a few, most toddlers start to survive on air

[Two mummies]

Hey Kate,

Didn't know about their apetites dropping off around 18 months, makes me feel a bit better when our little sparrow eats a couple of bites for dinner!

Last nights tea was half a vegetable patty and two small cheese sticks!

Soph