what are the next steps for independent sleeping for 10 month old

[legend_018]

She just turned 10 months.
Althought this was not a habit from when she was a new born, as some of you know I started holding her and/or rocking her to sleep and than putting her into her crib. I don't do that anymore. I put her into her crib and I say night night time. She pretty much knows for the most part that means lie down...but I have to pat/rub her back the entire time. Keep in mind it can take anywhere from 10 minutes to an hour or more for her to fall asleep. Just a few weeks ago I did a combo of shh/pat/rub and walk in walk out. sometimes the walk in/walk out method actually worked. but I think it prolongs the entire bed process and I just sort of stopped doing that method. I just shh/pat until she falls asleep basically.  If I did the walk in walk out method.....I also started noticing that she'd play for like 1/2 hour or more and than if she didn't fall asleep on her own she'd cry as in a real cry and I would have to do the entire pat/rub her back until she falls asleep. Believe me, when doing that method I let her cry a little such as small crys, whines, moans ect. ect and yes at least a few times a week it worked and she fell asleep on her own. I can definetely get her to fall asleep faster by doing the patting/rubbing method on her back.

Now sometimes she'll be like extremely close to falling asleep and I try to leave and she starts getting up as if it was play time unless she's in a crying mood. What is the next step? Crouched over her crib patting/rubbing her back or even sometimes just puttin my hand on her back can get so tiring after awhile.  If she does get up I go right back in now and say night night time and lie her down...or she'll know what it means and lie down herself now but I have to stay there........."lol". What are some next steps I should be implementin?

[Diegos Mama]

The absolute KEY element to Tracy's techniques is consistency.  Why did you give up on wi/wo?  Does she have any other props like bottles, pacifiers, etc. that could be getting in the way?  Are you doing the process for bedtime exactly the same and consistently each time?  If not, you won't see results, you'll see a confused baby who's crying because they don't know what to expect and are frustrated.

What are her nap/naps like?
What how long is she sleeping at night?
What is her total sleep for the day?

Have you read Tracy's newest book so you know if you're implementing things properly?

[legend_018]

well I have been doin the shh/pat/rub back while she is lying her crib fairly consistently. Someone had suggested that combo of wi/wo and shh pat wasn't so bad. But I don't know if the wi/wo is working. She just stands and plays for an incredible amount of time which causing timing problems with naps and the such. It did work a few times. She just turned 10 months.

Sometimes due to her lack of eating solids since 7 months of age...she'll cluster feed and will end up being hungry around nap time and I'll have to give her a bottle. It's not consistent and she doesn't rely on a bottle ever time she goes to bed. But I am working on making sure bottle is not upstairs and right before bed. Her last bottle of the day is downstairs and than she finishes it upstairs before I start the shh/pat process.

She naps 2ce a day...I work hard at it tooo. Usually an hour to an hour and half each nap. I try not to control her naps. But if she goes down very late for some reason i might control the first nap so she can get the 2nd nap in. Or if she naps very well during the first nap and goes down very late for 2nd nap I might control that one. Up times are anywhere from 2 hours and 45 minutes to 3 1/2 hours. THis is before I put her into the crib for night night time. She sleeps anywhere from 9 hours to 11 hours. Although nights like last night don't happen often for some reason she was up from midnight until 2am as I shh patted her the entire time. She fell asleep 2ce but woke up like minutes later. I'm working on giving her mix of water/formula in the middle of the night to wean her off wanting a bottle in the middle of the night.
I haven't read that book.
Does this anwser those questions?

[Diegos Mama]

It does, thanks.  I really think you need to get a copy of The Babywhisperer Solves All of Your Problems.  I think trying to solve issues on the website alone, withouth having read the book first, is really hard.  Tracy delves into huge amount of detail and information about sleep training babies at different stages and with different sleep issues.  I think you really need to start there first, otherwise you're trying to implement a technique that you haven't learned enough about and are potentially not going about correctly for maximum effect.

Pls. start with the book, read though it and try out Tracy's suggestions first.  Then use the site to compliment what you've figured out and the plan Tracy gives with specific questions here.  It's just too much for the moderators to walk step by step through an entire changing of sleep routine as they then, in essence, become the book and have to give out vast amounts of information in order to help.



On that note, she may not be all that tired at her naps if she's coming up on dropping one aroun a year so you may try cutting one back to be shorter, such as a shorter morning nap.  You'll need to rid of the bottles at night completely and have solids well established before you can expect sleep to come.    I think one mistake lots of us try to make is to work on the sleep before we have other issues fixed.  I suspect you still have some fixing to do before the real sleep training can happen.

But, start with the book, Tracy covers soooooo much of this stuff there.

 

[legend_018]

ok thanks. I actually just ordered it through Amazon.com.

I guess I was mostly wondering what course of action do I take to ween away from leaning in her crib shh/pat/rubbing her back until she falls asleep. Not that I mind doing that sometimes but now she is relying on that just like she relying on me holding and rocking her. I am working on multiple things from consistent nap times, up times, weaning bottle from middle of night, offering solids 3 X's a day, working on no bottle upstairs right before nap ect. ect. "lol". whewwwwww

Thanks,

<Mary>

[Diegos Mama]

Mary.

breathe.

Heheeee...

1)  Read book.
2)  Work on food intake.  Don't move on until food intake is solved and she's getting sufficient calories.

You won't resolve the staying with her patting if the feeding is not fixed so there's really no plan to make yet.

She may be drinking too much milk in bottles and that's impacting her food intake.  Whatever the problem, you absolutely must fix this first or sleep training in any form just won't work.

Start with the book. I bet you anything you'll find your situation or one close to it in there and you can formulate a plan from there.

[legend_018]

All I can say about the food intake is that has been a battle since she was about 7 months old. It wasn't always about too many bottles/formula. Somebody sent me a link that basically has other mothers that go thru the same thing and it can take a long time. I had also many posts regarding her refusal to eat at around 7 months. finally since she was about 9 1/2 months old. She just turned 10 months she started to come around a little. Mostly finger types of foods and occassionally will let you spoon feed her a little. Things have started to improve in that area, but it will take some time.